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Great Article About Swinging! - Great Article About Swinging! - [quote=KARMICSUNRISE][url=http://www.5280.com/magazine/2010/11/sin-city?page=0,1] Swingers Article...[/url][/quote]
There ya go Mav.
KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - "it felt like 5th grade and not getting picked for a team"
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - No drama here...fuck that
Searching for Sensual Photographer - - Gio is amazing GIOPHOTO is his profile name. Very classy and makes you feel comfortable. He has photographed many swingers and would be happy to show you his work. Tell him Koigirl sent you.
BUSTED! Your Kids Found Out Your Swingers. Now What? - - IMO, you wouldn't explain yourself about your monogamous "vanilla" sex life or activities, so why would you about this?
The subject of this thread was about your kids finding out. I'm not sure what age group of kids we're talking about and that can make a big difference. If they are adult children, you can simply tell them you are sorry they had to find out about it and regret that it makes them uncomfortable but it is your private life and will leave it there...in private. I think it is wise to reassure them that you will not do anything to embarrass them (start acting differently around them or other family members, etc.) and that nothing between you and them will change. Before they found out you were still the parent they loved and this will continue now.
If they are young children, it can be a little more complicated. The questions aren't just about the lifestyle but also about sex since they are probably learning and curious about the topic in general. But, you could keep it very simple (& age appropriate) and explain that sex is something adults enjoy privately and that if they have any questions about sex (emphasis not on swinging) you will be happy to answer.
If they pursue asking about swinging, I would just share that this is something better explained when they are a little older and that honesty and communication are valued so you will try to be as honest as you can be. However, you don't need to go into detail IMO. Often, kids are looking more for your reaction and some reassurance and aren't quite as concerned with the actual "words". They want to know their world isn't being disrupted.
The rest of your post mentioned family members, etc. Again, you would never feel obligated sit around and discuss the details of a vanilla sex life so it isn't necessary to discuss the details of swinging.
You could share that if someone has a private question they would like to ask they can if that's the kind of relationship you have with them. But, you can also add that you will only do so if comfortable.
I might stress or emphasize that you and your partner have an open and honest relationship that you enjoy together. There are a number of factors that go into enhancing that relationship making it so special and that they've stumbled onto one area that you've incorporated/explored. You appreciate that it might not be for everyone and you wouldn't expect everyone to understand but that you sincerely hope they would also be as considerate to not judge the two of you. I might add that while you've tried to be candid when answering their questions, you only ask in return that they respect your privacy and not share what they've learned or discussed with anyone else. Include them into the agreement by explaining that you will extend to them the same discretion they extend to you.
Who knows...one of them may have been curious about exploring the lifestyle and you might just be that one person they feel comfortable asking about it.
At the same time, people can be very judgemental so protect yourselves. However these family members found out...it could happen again if that avenue hasn't been fixed. I'm sorry this got so long-winded and I could write so much more. Whew!!! Good luck with this!
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - We do talk of different experiences, however, never do we "name drop". It is very important to not kiss and tell, we have even gone as far as to not let our testimonials be availble for people to see, its great to know what another couple thinks about ya but, too much info is givin sometimes....I really don't want everyone knowin how many people or what we have been up to, most of the time..just my 2 cents...
mrs. Tart:)
Black Rings - Do Swingers really? - We came across a piece of jewelry that is supposed to identify lifestyle participants that can be worn as a bracelet, necklace, anklet or pin. Its the shape of a heart combined with the infinity sign. We had one special made for Cyndi and when asked by vanilla people, we simply responded it stood for our love forever for each other. It was not long after we noticed another friend and neighbor wearing something similar. They had found it on a jewelry sight that caters to the lifestyle. Our friends are so vanilla they have no idea what they stumbled across. It seems there really is no for sure sign until you start swapping or taking your clothes off.
PICTURE SURFERS HANG A 180 LOL - - I think what they mean by "friends and MAYBE more" is that they are looking for friends first and if everyone establishes a friendship and clicks sexually more will follow. I guess everyone is different when it comes to the lifestyle and some take it more slowly than others. Some require a strong friendship before playing, some don't. Some feel that they may establish a friendship but one of the people just doesn't click sexually with one or more of the others and that feeling needs to be respected by all.
When we first started we were in the mindset that we had to find "best friends" with benefits and quickly discovered that we don't necessairly need to be best of friends, we do need to like the other people though and feel that attitude and personality are very important to us. We've been fortunate enough to maintain a friendship with everyone we've played with and some that we haven't because one of the group just couldn't make it to that level but we still maintain contact with each other.
I guess what I hate the most is when you run across someone that thinks that just because you are in the lifestyle and on a swingers site you automatically have to lay down and spread for anyone that asks. Doesn't happen often but seems like we get more than our share of it.
Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? - Attraction is just that... attraction. Age is just one of many factors that has the ability to blow my skirt up :) I think society gets a little hung up on it. I was out and about recently with a much younger guy and the looks I got ranged from amused to downright pissed off. I was actually a bit shocked that people even cared.
My issue with seeing much younger men is that their range of experience is limited. Now I'm not just talking sexually, but life experiences. So when you crawl out from under the sheets, what do you have to talk about? That is an issue. I enjoy conversation, debate and people who actually 'get it', yanno? In bed.. well they are typically sexual dynamos..woo hoo!
Older men...well they have their issues too. I find that a few have had difficulty with relationship/play/dating/romance stuff. Their heads are stuck in good girl/bad girl issues and so I either get treated like a total slut/whore or a princess. It's strange. Skill level here can be amazing and while they typically don't have the dynamo factor, they have stamina and MAD skills... woo hoo!
Women are great at any age. I find I always have something to talk about with them. Sexually speaking... well, women speak a very similar language and most are sexually intuitive. Even those that have limited bi experience... woo hoo!
That about covers everyone... LoL... :) Happy play to you all!
Te
Friend collectors or swingers - - We fwb couple. We don't like collecting friends and I usually clean out most about once a year. Just hard to find a good friend
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