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Where are all the gentlemen? - - Its single guys like that (a few married ones too) that give single guys bad reputations. I personally feel that regardless if it is a swing party, event, occassion, etc. whenever a couple or woman in general is willing to allow you to touch her in any situation it should be done with all respect. OK, there are def times when she may want to be called a dirty whore, filthy cum slut, just a 3-hole bitch,etc. but those are very obvious times and just because she is a swinger doesn't mean you have the right to put your hands or any other body parts on her without her permission. NOBODY should assume they have any rights to do anything with anyone's body that is not their own! Swingers, Sluts, Whores, Prostitutes, etc. does not mean free for all who care to use me, touch me,etc. People in general should be repected simply because it is their body, regardless of what they may let someone else do to it. There is just no home training anymore, sad, sad wolrd.
Whenever I am lucky enough to find a couple that is looking for a single male I make sure to verify what is and what is not allowed. As a single male I understand that I am being given a gift to share in the sexual encounters of this man's wife, lover, partner, girlfriend, baby momma,etc. 90% of the time it is mainly for her enjoyment and I have yet to meet anyone that likes strangers to paw them out of the blue or see a person they care about be pawed without consent. My purpose in that situation is to bring more pleasure to the couple by pleasing the women with/without in same/different room, adding that extra spark they haven't been able to obtain with just the two of them.
Ok, I'm getting off my soap box, but this really pisses me off to hear things like that are still happenening and some people can be so ignorant and rude.
Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - Much of what has been said I agree with, but I do know poly couples in the lifestyle. Their swinging is a bit more complicated as far as the decision process because I would imagine that such a decision would need to be agreed upon by all partners involved.
The biggest difference I think between regular swingers and those who are involved in poly relationships is while most people who swing would shun the development of emotional ties to other swingers thinking it would be the doom of their spousal (primary) relationship, those who are also involved in or those who are open to the possibility of poly relationships would welcome the development of additional relationships for what they are knowing there is neither a need to replace their spouse or run off with the person they have formed this new relationship with. It does add further complication to their life, but it can also enrich it tremendously.
My .02 from an observers standpoint.
Christian Swingers - - Posted By: TEQUILAROSE Reply posted on:
Aug 24, 2008 - 5:13 pm
I am an Atheist myself.
well well well so are we lol
k & a
Swingers Vacation Spots - Help us - Hedo is definately the top destination on our list. We will be offering HUGE discounts to members with our travel agent partner. Look for group vacations being put together in the near future.
Lake Powell Trip June 11-14 (Last Topic got deleted somehow) - - OK,, not sure where the Announcement went but lets do this again....
Every year, we put on a Lake Powell trip. In previous years, it has been a mixed crowd,, swingers and vanillas. This year we are going to change it up and add a trip in June that is Lifestylers only. Dates for this are June 11-14. We are still doing the August trip as well, but it will be a bit tamer than the June trip.
Houseboats will be availible for those that want to go. The cost last year for the houseboats worked out to be around $800 for the 4 days per couple. This included fuel. With decreased fuel prices this year, it should be a bit less. If we get enough people to warrant it, and if I can talk the pig supplier to provide pigs twice in one year (Yes, Buttabing, this is directed towards you) we will do a luau pig on Saturday night.
Last year, some people tent camped as well so staying on a houseboat is not a requirement. As a courtesy though to those that are renting the houseboats, if you do use the amenities of the houseboat such as bathrooms, showers, cooking and kitchen stuff, etc... you donate to whoever rented the boat.
Having a boat is not a requirement. Those that do have them don't seem to have a problem "adopting" those that don't.
A bunch of peeps from this site went last year and from what we hear, everyone had a good time.
I will need commitments from those that want to go no later than March 29th so I can ensure that I tie up enough houseboats for those that want them.
Probably my last post - True colors are showing now - Well. I shouldn't. But we're all "getting it out of our systems" so I will.
I had been having a great time in the chat room, until Wild decided to badger me and badger me and badger me about the fact that HE was REALLY single - not "married but playing with wife's permission" (as I truly am). He just kept poking at it and wouldn't let it go.
How... ironic... that I am, indeed, what I said I was and the protester turns out to be not what he said he was. Hmmmm.... "Methinks he protested too much".
I even mentioned his heavy-handed "monitoring" to the staff and they refused to do anything but take his side in every item. OK. So I stopped participating in the chat room - for months.
Now. Big Breath. My "problem" is nothing compared to what has happened to others, so I suppose I should just count myself lucky. I *do* feel for you all, but I also will plead with you to consider that "swingers have some bad apples just like the general populace - but have mostly-good people - just like the general populace".
Thank you Lifestyle. - A commentary about our journey - [quote=SAMEROOMONLY]Thanksgiving just passed us by and Xmas and the New Year are quickly approaching. I thought I would take a long moment of my time, and your time if you are reading this, to tell this massive entity, called the "Lifestyle" how it has changed me this year.
We have been in the Lifestyle for a little over a year and a half. We don't even like the name lifestyle. We prefer "kinky" or "adventurous" or even just "fun as hell", but it seems the term will be around for awhile longer. The wife and I often ponder what exactly the Lifestyle is. Is it a certain set of rules and guidelines that we all live in? Is it the same for us as it is for everyone else? How often does it hurt marriage or relationships and how often does it help? Do we regret our decision to enter into it?
When we first tip-toed into the waters we were intimidated, in awe and totally unprepared for what we would experience. It all seemed magical and sometimes scary. We have and had a great marriage and thought we wanted a new, kinky adventure together. We planned to go slow and we would be fine, we were certain. But we were nervous. We were so sloshed at our first Sinful party that we irritated a few people there, no doubt, and probably made asses of ourselves. We still do that sometimes, but now we do it conscientiously. But we grew and learned quickly and have morphed into what we are today (huge asses).
Interestingly enough, a few years before we entered the LS, we thought swingers were all gross, dirty, sexually infected people ( I am still not ruling some of you out). We had met a couple that harassed us at every opportunity and were the "creepy" type. Now we know people may think of us the same way if they found out, which is sad, because we like to be honest and open with all of our friends. So, like many of you, it is a secret we keep. It is a trade off for doing what we do.
So what have I learned? How have I changed? I have always been a non-judgmental person by most standards, but still I had strong opinions about certain things. One spouse, one partner; that is how it should be done. So what changed? First off, our communication started to blossom about all sorts of things once my wife left her religion. I won't mention names, but it begins with an L and ends in DS. We talked and talked and talked and the more we talked the more we realized that we both had kinky minds and that maybe we should "experiment". So, we made some rules, actually a LOT of rules, and entered the ring. Still thinking one spouse, one partner, but maybe, just maybe we could play in the same room as other people. How kinky is that? Hence our name...sameroomonly. Well, as some of you know, the lifestyle is a monstrous, living, breathing beast and can quickly drag you to places you never thought possible. We made some mistakes, had some great times and just fumbled our way through for a few months trying to figure out where our lines were and what we should or shouldn't do. Then we got smart. We learned to communicate again, like we used to do privately, only now we could do it with other people around. And it was refreshing. No more secret code words (well, sometimes) and no more wondering if what one of us was doing was not condoned by the other. So that is the first thing I think the LS has helped us with. Communication. We communicate like mother fuckers. Better than all of our non-lifestyle friends, for the most part. Are we always amazing and never have bumps? Of course not. Anyone who says they never have drama are either liars or delusional. So thank you lifestyle for our ability to exchange ideas and to be more honest with each other, always.
The next thing we found was that we were making friends at a very fast pace. We made a kik group and had our first party with about 40 people up in Park City only 5 or so months after joining the website. It was a blast. We still host parties and invite new people all the time. We enjoy introducing new friends with old friends. Wait, did I say friends or fuck buddies? Don't we sleep with all of our friends? Isn't that the expectation? Not for us. We have made friends that we know will be around until we are all old and gray. We have lost friends because we wouldn't fuck. There are whole discussions on these forums about how some just want to meet and fuck, because this is a swinging site, not a friend site. And to each their own. We don't judge, but for us the rewards of our friendships have far outweighed the 10 or 20 seconds of amazing sex. We have friends around the world that we never would have met without the LS. So to the lifestyle, I say thank you for all of the wonderful friends we have made. Love you all, some more than others ( you know who I am talking about). :)
The LS has also taught me to be less judgmental and to avoid using words like "never" or "always". Life is full of gray areas and has lost much of its black and white features. Oh sure, I still judge, have preferences and prejudices, but we all do. I just really believe in walking in another's shoes before I make any decisions about someone's life. So lifestyle, thank you for making me more understanding of other people.
Last of all, I just want to say that the sexual journey has been amazing. We have shared many hot, sexy and intimate times with some of you and we have come to realize how similar we all are. We all like sex, we all have a kinky side, or else we wouldn't be here. I have done things that I never imagined would ever happen, with some of the sexiest, most beautiful people I have ever met. I have shared intimate moments with people I care deeply about and others that were just passing through. All have their high points. I have experienced more than most people would even dream about, as have most of you. We are the select who choose to follow our dreams and fantasies. I think we are fortunate. So lifestyle, thank you for all the amazing sex.
In the end the lifestyle is different for everyone. It is a whole sub universe in the middle of a "normal" society. Sometimes we have to walk among the shadows to keep our secret, but totally worth it. I would never trade the LS for my wonderful marriage and think I am the luckiest man alive to be married to my beautiful, amazing wife who has shared this journey with me. Love you, Babe.
As with everything in life, there will be people who read this and like it, some who don't care and some who disagree or will want to pick it to pieces. That is what makes this amazing. There are so many wonderful, different people and the lifestyle is a perfect diving board to jump into the sea of waiting bodies and personalities. So if you are new, jump in, explore and learn. If you are old school, help others to weather the bumps and keep exploring. Long live the lifestyle.
That is a little about my journey, how about you? I encourage anyone to add what they think or feel the LS has done for them, even negative things. Merry xmas to everyone and hope to meet some of you new people. And to my friends, I care about each and every one of you.
All of life is an adventure we live at the moment, and relive introspectively, over and over again. If the reexamination of our life experiences leads us toward insight and positive personal epiphanies, in so much that our day to day, in the moment life experiences, become more dear and vivid, augmenting upward and forward into the future, then can we not count ourselves lucky indeed?
If we are healthy, we want to be embraced, emotionally, socially and sexually. If the "lifestyle" can help to afford us the fulfillment of these desires, will it not lead to enhancement of our happiness, and growth individually and as a couple if we are partnered? Will the experience make us more proficient and giving lovers? Can it make us better people?
Quick question for couples - - [color=#411256"][/color]We began all this in 1996 and by 1999 we had totally quit meeting one couple at a time. (We don't meet singles so I can't address that aspect with meetings)
(1) Total mismatches. (Couples personality didn't match with our own, we [b]REQUIRE[/b] a sense of humor before any possibility of sex, we must laugh before sex and then you can laugh [b]at us [/b]AFTER sex)
(2) Couples not looking anything like the photos originally sent. ([u]Very[/u] old photos)
(3) No shows
We are in the entertainment business (Music) and work 10-15 weekends in a row before getting one off if we are lucky, having a night "crash and burn" for one the reasons mentioned was NOT accepatable. A few of these 2 couple dinners reminded me more of "The Last Supper".
These days we meet couples at swingers clubs, meet & greets, and we go on 1-2 swingers cruises a year. If we don't meet anyone of interest we still have a good time with each other, nothing lost and no bad dinners for us.
I can appreciate the folks living in small towns won't have as many options. All I can say is GOOD LUCK with the one couple meetings, they didn't work for us at all.
Can I get an AMEN BROTHER! :^)
How's everyone spending the long weekend? - Who's up for some spontaneous get togethering? - We're celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary all weekend, we started Wednesday night with our private dinner and a Vegas show, Of course Thursday is T-day so family time, Friday is party time with friends, a dinner with everyone and a party at the swingers club later that night. Sat and Sun is as much sex as we can fit in.
If anyone is in Vegas they can join us, we wish we lived in Utah though, so many people there
Escort Couple - - If you are doing research as to the viability of the concept as a business opportunity or just because you think it might be exciting then I think that yes it would work. Swingers would not be your target market. Really, someone who is interested, but cannot be associated with the lifestyle would be your most likely client. Of course, we understand, this is all just erotic fantasy. This is of course just fun and games. Bedtime stories more than bedtime realities.
There probably are, right here in Salt Lake City, more than a few ultra wealthy, attractive, intelligent men, deeply affiliated with the predominate religion that might just really go for it. Repressing a desire, over many years often lets it take control. So a descendant of old pioneer stock whose family life, social life, economic life and sizable inheritance are all contingent upon maintaining the appearances of absolute adherence to church standards, with a frigid wife, might be willing to pay bank rolls in return for certain experiences and discretion. The fact that you look quite upscale and are educated would most probably make you, as a couple, almost irresistible to just such a person with certain desires. Having once worked for a bank at a executive level (another life) and also having been part of church society (Also a former life for both of us) I still know quite a few tie wearing church going sorts that work for or in some cases are the