Otterville Swingers in Missouri

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International Swingers Day - How are you celebrating? - We are headed to the New Yorker and have a room downtown

Now that you're one of them there fancy swingers... - - I play as a single male (although sometimes I bring a vanilla swirl along to an event or something) but I've always had good experiences with people I meet up with. I have also had nothing but good experiences at parties, so I guess I'm pretty lucky that way. For me, the lifestyle hasn't exactly turned me into a sex snob or anything like that, but I have gotten used to the open attitudes. It has become much harder (and not in the good way) to play with vanilla females who don't have those same attitudes. Not in the sense of I'm coming on too strong or pushing boundaries harder, but just that "normal" attitudes towards sex and sexual exploration in the LS are different than those in the single scene.

Why do you swing? - Why not? - [quote=DEEPMOAN]I started early in college, wasn’t called swinging but partying, had been with women already but the threesomes and larger parties started then too. Had gotten married after grad school to someone that hadn’t experienced any of it. Started as pillow talk when he asked about my past, I asked him then if he seriously wanted to know, in the back of my mind I knew I shouldn’t bring it up. But things in bed weren’t great and I had tried and was trying to talk about it but he didn’t take suggestions well. So I thought putting it all out there might help. In the beginning it did help, we were trying new stuff just between the two of us but always talking. Then he asked if I still knew anyone, told them pretty much everyone you have met of my friends had been or still are involved. He asked if I what sex with her or her or her, but then reluctantly asked if I had sex with him or him and told him. Those two I had threesomed with, been with her and her and him and him. We would have great sex while I was telling him about the parties or whatever. I asked him if he wanted to go to a party sometime? I made sure I asked while we were not having sex so he could absorb it all or hope he would. At that point personally I don’t think I would need to swing but the thought of starting up again was certainly exciting for me as well. Am sure you can probably understand how this all went. Unfortunately he didn’t have the mind for swinging, talking about it or fantasizing about it he did. Thought the best thing would be for me to invite a couple over. Friends of mine that he had gotten to know, he was quite taken by her. I had always had a great time with them. I spoke to them both to see if they were interested, told them how we got to this point. They said they would be up for, us three agreed we would take it slow and let him try and get a handle on how things progressed. Had asked him if he wanted to be in the same room with things heated up? We would see how it went and make a decision then. My gf thought it might be better if they were separate and he didn’t have to worry about me in the room with him. All went great, dinner and drinks, out by their pool, the 4 of us were talking about all and at one point Tina grabbed him and took him to their bedroom. Was telling him I had no idea how this was going to go, but relaxed and started having some fun myself. Very shortly after I could hear them in the kitchen, she and I had talked that before they came out she would take him somewhere close so I would know they were on their way out and I could stop rather than be in the middle of something. Her husband knew as well. Tina and my husband were telling us how much fun they had but I knew something didn’t go well. Finding out he was asking Tina about my past, all sorts of questions, things he didn’t ask me. Of course Tina’s response to all were I don’t know, we got home and in bed I was asking how it went, he was telling me a bunch of shit, how he got her off, how much she loved it, a lot more of the same, also how much of a stud he was and she did things I never did. He asked what we did, told him not much, mostly talk, had given him oral, why just that, because you were gone less than a half hour, but told him we were talking. So much for the great sex after. Like I said earlier, he just didn’t have the mind for it, nothing I was going to do or say would have changed that I believe. After we went to a couple of house parties, but the pillow talk had stopped and knowing after he saw me had sex at a house party it wasn’t going to continue like our marriage, snide comments about me with other men and other reasons were the end of our marriage. Was meant to be single, truly believe that even when I get a romantic connection now with a partner, man or woman.[/quote] That really sucks. Sorry to hear that. It makes me laugh (cringe?) when I hear so many swingers talking about vanilla hunting and/or converting their friends to swinging. The harsh truth is that MOST people simply cannot handle swinging and are best left to their fantasies about fucking other people recreationally.

Is this one of your rules? What is it? is it fear? or something - Does everyone feel this way? - Don, I completely agree. I'm not suggesting "friends first" folks are wrong. I'm just explaining: 1. Why WE don't use that phrase...and folks often make offensive assumptions about us because we don't. 2. Why WE are always a bit uneasy about contacting couples who DO use that phrase. FYI, around where we live, we have this whole "lifestyle clique" who run around protesting WAY too much about how friends is all that matters and they aren't in it for the sex at all, and labeling anyone who disagrees with them as "bedpost notchers." Mostly though, the way you get in their crosshairs is by telling one of them "no thanks." So this is a bit of a sore subject for us...as we DID tell a few of them "no thanks" and we aren't about to lie and say we didn't become swingers for the sexual aspects. Duh! LOL

We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - We all meet with people we aren't compatible with. It's the nature of the beast. Why focus on the shitty times? It appears you've had successes. Focus on the positive :-) -D-

Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - [quote=T0RQUE][quote=MORKANDMINDY]I think the fact that the site hasn't offered lifetime membership specials for so long has really impacted people's ability to connect with newer couples. [/quote] Contrare, Mr. Mork. Last month, our lifetime membership was $35. just sayin... [/quote] what you got your lifetime membership for $35...shit they charged me $35.50, and what happened to the endless supply of former Victoria secret models living in the salt lake valley that they promised at my every whim? What ever happened to the good old days when a handshake was a promise...not a way to ejaculate.

Question - do you talk about other swingers? - Hehehe...See Te! You've got a lot of people covering your back! ;)

How Old Is Old - - hey blueeyes, from our perspective at least, we think you are probably right and probably wrong at the same time!!! . . . you are right about being in the minority relative to the kind words offered by most in this post, but we really believe you are also part of the vast majority of swingers who use age as a primary basis for discrimination . . . kind of a strong opinion we suppose, except that we can see at least 4 different ways anyone can pretty easily check for age discrimination providing some basis for that opinion . . . BUT, before we go into all of that, please understand that we realize that everyone is entitled to discriminate in any way they see fit . . . in fact, discrimination is not just ok, it is absolutely necessary!!! . . . you see, no one has enough time to sample from every cup (sigh!!!), so everyone has to establish discriminating criteria . . . and, for sure, we're NOT feelin' sorry for ourselves; we realize it's just part of the deal . . . there is one more thing to mention before listing ways to check for age discrimination: we think there is a pretty easy and logical answer for the OP . . . those tired of reading already, can skip to the bottom and get that opinion . . . however, we kinda hope peeps continue reading 'cause, sooner or later, age is an issue everyone will face . . . so, how does one check for age discrimination??? . . . try this: pick any population center (like slc) . . . open a bunch of profiles in that population from different age groups (say, 30's, 40's, 50's, and beyond) . . . record the number of times each profile was "recently viewed" (ya know, that little statistic conveniently provided by swingular) . . . then, simply compare the numbers for the different age groups . . . if your sample is big enough, you will see profile interest decreases with age . . . if you don't want to do the math, just talk with folks of all ages and ask them what they see . . . i know many (most???) complain like crazy about email (but somehow, everyone seems ok with tweeting, texting, facebooking, etc - - - hmmm???) . . . and, shit, there is always face-to-face (omg!!!) . . . so anywho, find an acceptable way to communicate, just ask, and keep track of what people say . . . we've done that to some extent, without any surprises . . . (although this method takes a bit more time, it has the added benefit of allowing you to connect with others) . . . another way to look for age discrimination centers on visiting other swing sites . . . we won't mention those competitors, 'cause we don't want to upset swingular management . . . but, hey, most all of us know where to look anyhow . . . in our experience, virtually all other sites list age preferences inside each profile . . . so, open a bunch of 'em and note age preferences . . . if your sample is big enough, you will see that there is almost no interest in those beyond 55 . . . it's almost like a cliff, and that somehow, sex, sensuality, desirability, etc, have an expiration date . . . we would like to think that it really depends on the individuals involved . . . and finally, there is an acid test: simply stick around the lifestyle . . . sooner or later, you will have a personal verification of the age discrimination issue . . . btw, we hope you do stick around, and we hope you have a great time doing it . . . so, how old is too old??? . . . we simply believe you are too old when finding suitable partners becomes too hard . . . what is "too hard" and who is "suitable" will vary for everyone, so the chronological marker for every swinger will be a bit different . . . but, the bottom line is the same: you are too old when this business gets too hard . . . btw, we certainly hope our time doesn't come too soon!!! . . . cheers!!! . . .

Biker Trash Fun Packs - motorcycle riding group - I just started up a yahoo group for Utah area biker/swingers, if you are interested- http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SwingBiker/ it's new as of 9/14/06!!:i

seniors - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single ladies? - Mark it on the calendar, I agree with Tequila Rose!!LOL Tact is usually taught by our parents and environment, not geography. However.........(speaking of Southern Utahans) We live in a "Jack Mormon" area of the "south" people don't shove religious beliefs down our throat, different Mormons in different places (not trying to bag on Mormons, just a using them to make a point) 50 miles south, they are not as tolerant of us "Non-members" My point is this......TACT is something you have to WANT to learn and apply to your life, where you live usually only decides how far you can run your mouth before getting punched out, some people tolerate others better over different subjects, you might find more racism in a community that has a majority, the more mixed the culture, the more diverse, the less mixed, probably less diverse (that can be a matter of geography.) BTW, how did this topic take such a sour turn? from swinging seniors to tactless posts on the forum........UGH Anyway......back to the sex...... ~K~