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What is up with Utah?! - Swingers in Utah and nowhere else? - We love all the hot :h Utah swingers they are the best
is soft swap swinging??? - - MO69,
Great answer! NO ONE defines swinging. Anyone that uses sentences that start with, "Your not a swinger unless.." or "Real swingers do...." or something similar. These people don't know shit. It's just a way to pressure you. It's sophomoric bullshit, used by kids to pressure each other. They're not unlike the morons that measure their worth by their posessions. Spare yourself the trouble.
-Don-
Proud member of "Free Thinkers"
San Diego clubs? - Friday June 4 - We'll be in San Diego on Friday June 4. Is there a good swingers club the wife and I could visit that night?
Then we'll be in Los Angeles Sat night. What about a club there? (We've been to Sea Mountain Inn in Palm Springs and enjoyed that, but we didn't want to drive that far Sat night)
Thanks!
Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - Swinging is just a gateway drug. Do it as long as we have and pretty soon barnyard animals and corporate mascots start to look pretty good. Always lookin' for a bigger rush, a higher high, a kinkier fuckhole. I'm guessing in 10 or 15 years we'll REALLY be into the hard stuff like raping priests (hey, some of 'em totally deserve it) and dressing up like breakfast cereal characters and humping large appliances.
Denial - What is the proper way to turn someone down. - Your worrying about it too much. Hope this doesn't offend, but really you are over thinking it. I'd just do what you want to do and not worry about what everyone feels or thinks. The only thing you SHOULD do if you don't want to get a lot of emails telling you how stuck up you are, is just be NICE.
Being NICE is actually pretty hard for some people and I still don't understand why. As for answering the mountains of board mails you will get on this site, Don't stress it. We used to think we should respond to every email and I'll tell you right now, it's impossible. We made a rule really early and that was that your friend request would only be approved if we did in fact know you personally, or if the one asking had made some effort to get to know us in a Chat room, or by email.
One thing though that I would advise you as newbies on this site. If you allow your "sexual preferences" to dictate who and if you will meet someone in the lifestyle, then you are going to miss out on it's rich experience. Not everyone you meet that you may develop of friendship with is going to want to fuck you. So I'd not worry about meeting new people, even if they are asking to be your friend online. The key is always controlling how you'll meet people (which is easy) and then letting things take their course.
As for the "old" factor. You both are going to be really disappointed then with the "No one over 35" rule. The average age for Swingers in the United States is 35-45. Your wife is fairly young, she feels funny about guys my age being her Dad's age, well the feeling is mutual. Contrary to what some women might think, it's not all about the tight ass and perky boobs. But as for a friendship (non-sexual) why the hell not?
If your patient, friendly, and get out there and meet other swingers (like the parties), I think you'll find what you are looking for in sexual partners. I also think in some cases newbies are pretty "fixed" on what they think they want sexually. But after 4 years you may notice that what you "thought was ideal" is no longer the case. Keeping an open mind is pretty important in anything in life and it's not a bad idea in regards to swinging as well.
Good luck to you guys
Mr ABC
Single male in this lifestyle.. - I have questions for couples and single females. - Heya Josh. These are all extremely well thought out responses. Take them to heart. I'd also like to add that quite a few couples opt to have the man from a friendly, familiar, and secure couple fill the role of the second man from time to time. Most of the people here have healthy, loving, and established lives with someone they trust deeply. The less in-roads for unstable elements, the better.
Don't take it personally. When I was active as part of a couple screening all the single men was a chore. There is an unfortunately well-deserved stigma tied to single men in this scene. Many figure that swingers are an easy lay and end up simply being a nuisance, or worse, a creep or downright menace. Disrespect and deception abound. That's not a personal knock as I don't know ya.
Be smart. Be respectful. Don't fret if you're not a hot commodity. It's the nature of the scene.
Going to Vegas, Where do we need to be? - - There is a new pool party in Vegas. Couples only. Run by some swingers. Don't know any details yet but are probably going to check it out when we're down there in 3 weeks. If anyone wants details I'll see if I can find the link.
swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - The problem with waaaaaaa is that in my humble opinion he is a pathetic little man in brain power.Obviously he can't talk about any thing but sex must mean the fat bitch beside him isn't giving him any.Oh look other people can be rude also.Get a life and the sex talk will come but as i said previously do you go out and talk about nothing but sex with everyone that you meet.I guarantee if you met my wife and first thing out of your mouth was sex talk,you'd be in a world of deep shit.We got into this life style to meet people with like attitudes to be friends.Some we have met and became friends with and still have NOT had sex with them.Others we have met and talked a while about this that and the other things and had great sex with them.Now judging by your vocabulary and your picture it appears to me that is all you can do is talk about it.You must figure that if you talk about it enough some one will finally give in and give you some.NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!!!!!!!!
Soft-core roll call - A call out to those interested in the softer side. - Canvas,
It sounds like you and your wife are not quite on the same page yet, which is quite normal at the beginning of exploring the Lifestyle. You are looking for friendships with those who are in a similar situation. That's a good idea, but be prepared that even those friendships may be fleeting as the chemistry or level of comfort may still be different.
At the beginning of our lifestyle journey, my wife and I were just as you are today, (I was also at a different level as my wife too). TheFunCouple offers excellent advice on going to meet & greets. I also add that you might want to check out a place like Sea Mountain Inn in Palm Springs. There you can see how comfortable it is to be nude in front of others and witness all the different levels of the lifestyle. You will have opportunities to talk to others and learn more. There is no pressure to play. Plus, you will be out of Utah and away from people who might recognize you.
If you are adventurous enough, maybe plan a vacation to Temptations Resort in Mexico. This resort is not truly a lifestyle resort but is a lifestyle friendly resort since so many non swingers go there. It still is a sexually charged resort. You will meet a lot of people who are similar to you there and you have a whole week to be relaxed, get into vacation mode, and explore your steps into the lifestyle together without judgement or pressure.
Kik group for UT swingers. - Contact me if your interested in joining a KIK group for Swingers - Kik: sl1ckity and out in the 84108 for the week/weekend if anyone has recommendations for a good bar/hiking/etc
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