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Lusting After the EVER ELUSIVE Male-with-Hallpass - The Great Swingular Mystery - [quote=FRIENDLYGENTLEMAN][quote=PALS4FUN] Guilty as charged! In our case though, it's a bit due to the fact that we're somewhat unusual here. I (the Mrs) sorta drive things and hubby is a minor participant. I'm sorta on a permanent hall pass and he's kinda along for the ride! [/quote] I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Pals. Somebody earlier also made a reply that said something along the lines of "this site is male-driven". In my experience, at least, this site is the opposite of male-driven. Sure, there are plenty of single guys and "single" guys, but most of the active couples on the site are primarily female-driven as far as I can tell. Now, that doesn't stop males with hall passes from being a rarity. Just because it's female driven doesn't mean that the male half is allowed to play on his own. Or that they are looking for additional guys. Even here, it seems that it is more acceptable for a female to admit to being bisexual or bi-curious than it is for the male. Take a look at the profiles of your friends; I would be willing to bet decent money that well over half of them have the male listed as straight and the female listed as something other than straight.[/quote]Hey, I'm gonna disagree right back at ya, buster! :) I think that the site and associated swingers are driven by the DEMAND for FEMALES but I think that the swinging and active searching for swing partners is mostly completed by the male half. For example, I'll bet that 90% of the folks posting here regularly are the male half. And yes, there's a huge volume of Bi-Females here, but certainly THAT is not exclusively female driven either. How many guys will raise their hands to participate if they're asked to watch two women going at it then be able to jump in the middle of 'em? A male fantasy. If the women were just interested in meeting other women there'd be female hall-passes getting used all over the place with other women, but there isn't because the husband wants to be involved and the women will generally acquiesce -- again, ultimately driven by the male desire rather than the females. But then, hell, I like weeners too much to ever be gay so whadda I know?! [em]Emo_12[/em] Maybe it all really is driven by women looking for other women and the men just get dragged along screaming and kicking! [em]Emo_60[/em]

Whats good for the goose is good for the gander... - - Just one last thought on the subject. I rarely post on these issues, but have to throw this in on this particular thread. I believe the basic question that we all have to ask ourselves is: "Why are we in the LifeStyle to begin with?" I will not presume to answer for anyone on here, but for my wife and I the particular reason is to spend our lives living not living to spend our lives. As far as all the single males, fatties, skinnies bashing that appears to be occurring, folks, we are missing the basic premise of the swinging lifestyle here. It is to meet new people, establish friendships and to reap the benefits of those friendships even if they are just someone to go get a burger with. Just because you are on a "Swingers" site, sex is not all that there is. We are just as happy finding folks that want to grab dinner and see a movie as we are playing around with. Building lasting relationships and having people that one can count on is more important than notching our bedposts. As far as the body weight issue is concerned, K has gone through quite an ordeal to lose over 100 pounds in the past 15 months (and she is looking very good!). To those folks that apply the HWP stipulation to their profiles. all I can suggest is that perhaps you should redefine your limitations. You could be missing out on not only some great friendships, but actually some pretty intense sexual experiences. Kitty, anyone that has anything negative for you should seriously step back and examine who they are, what they want, where they are in life and why they are in this particular lifestyle. And BTW, I am with you on your own little world thing! It is ALL about having fun, making friends and enjoying life. The limits that each individual or couple places upon themselves, is by their choice and I support that choice, but they only limit the experiences they will have in our exceptional community. Secrets, I totally agree with you on the being good at being ourselves point. However, sometimes the choices and perceptions that we have are too overwhelming. Let's face it, no one is born into this lifestyle and all of our ideas, conceptions and beliefs are based on what we learned in our formative years. For some, that includes the perfective (is that a word?) states of looks, shape and health. Is that the goals that should drive us in a lifestyle of this nature? One last thing.....Kendra, love the tat on your back, but MAN that had to hurt!

Combining Lifestyle & Non-Lifestyle Friends - - [quote=SLCJEEPER]Ah, good topic AC! We're happy to have met many people here that we now consider good close friends that we don't have to hide from when we see them at the mall while we're out with our kids. LoL! It's nice to find those who can be vanilla because our whole life isn't about swinging. So, yes, we have had success in blending swingers into our vanilla lifestyle and we hope to find more:) Joe & Debbi [/quote]guess we've been lucky too! We've found a number of friends who we are able to see in a "vanilla" setting, as well....and never had to worry about any "beans" gettin' spilled... As every profile says..."discreation is a must........"

Kik group for UT swingers. - Contact me if your interested in joining a KIK group for Swingers - Kik: sl1ckity and out in the 84108 for the week/weekend if anyone has recommendations for a good bar/hiking/etc

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! - - Merry Christmas to all on the State-side! (we hail from Ogden, normally) We've met a lot of awesome swingers in Utah and hope to meet even more in the future when we return. XOXO!

Help us out.. Take this Survey - For Utah Swingers - Not being cocky. . . but I totally aced that! Booyah!

Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Also interested if this is going on tonight

Hanging out this weekend - Habits tonight?? - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET][quote=HERRIMANFUN]We enjoy it if there is a couple we are interested in they have sections that aren't so loud that you can talk. But yes it is loud. And we have run into lots of swingers there lots of times. But I hear that a lot I think most people don't talk to people or just walk up to a stranger(s) and say hi. But I the male half does a lot that's how you meet people and then once you chat a bit it comes out that they are swingers. Not a big fan of he meet and greets it's always the same people unfortunately. And that's great for some but we haven't really made a connection at any that we have been too, yet. [/quote] We have been to the meet and greets too and we don't go very often and have not been to one in ages. Maybe twice a year we hit one but when we do go we pretty much introduce ourselves to everybody and if we missed someone we didn't mean to. You do have to be proactive to be successful in meeting people or at least reactive in a positive fashion when someone interesting approaches you. We have been to Habits and ended up leaving with someone, but we had already had a bit of friendly back and forth somehow with the people we left with or it was someone we met previously and had at least chatted a bit. We think we have only been there maybe five times altogether. Well, maybe Mr. Delicious will put on a collared shirt just in case we head that way but for now we are thinking maybe the Green Pig sounds fun. [/quote] Well if you make it to Habits please come and say hello.

Observations from the other side of the room - Some unsolicited advice - [quote=EVILDOERS]All good advice. You should give seminars to the GAZILLIONS of single males who think female swingers are nymphomaniac, wanton sluts who will fuck anyone, any time, anywhere and that their husbands/partners are pathetic, impotent cucks who don't know how to please their partners and need a "real" man to satisfy their wives/girlfriends. You could make BANK teaching the utterly clueless how to act like a gentleman and do a service to the lifestyle by helping to weed out the twatwaffles who have no business even ATTEMPTING to enter a lifestyle they know nothing about and should leave immediately![/quote] That's a really good idea! I am no authority but I agree that Utah guys have a bad reputation. I have heard similar stories from friends on vanilla dating sites where the guy just wants a one night stand. I am glad that my post was read and responded to. I agree that my comments are common sense as well. Unfortunately, common sense isn't all that common. Any suggestions on what to name my seminar?

How do you spot a Swinger..?! - tell tell signs of the lifestyle - just read through them not a bad idea WHITE (Novice) - These individuals are new to the Lifestyle and are still exploring whether or not they want to become involved. It is extremely important to honor their candor in identifying themselves as swing virgins. They're titillated by the idea, but one or both spouses are still unsure about actual involvement. They desire information, conversation, and possibly mentorship. Seasoned swingers are encouraged to act as gentle ambassadors. Please provide the information they seek, without actively enlisting them. It is important to remember that these individuals may ultimately decided that the Lifestyle is not right for them. PURPLE (VoyEx) - These individuals enjoy watching and being watched. Two or more couples will engage in sex acts with their own spouse or significant other while remaining visible to, and in close proximity to playmates. Many enjoy swing clubs for the atmosphere, but play only with their own spouse. Physical attraction, chemistry, and friendship are often important. PINK (Soft Swap) - Theses individuals enjoy sexual interaction with others just short of intercourse. Sexual activity is limited to flirting, heavy petting, kissing, licking, and possibly oral sex. Physical attraction, chemistry, and friendship are often important. DARK BLUE (Lowest level of Full Swap) - These individuals will engage in everything up to and including intercourse with the opposite spouse or significant other. Most have established rules regarding what is and is not acceptable. Many require that their spouse or significant other remain in the same room or at least in full view. Physical attraction, chemistry, and friendship are often important. DARK GREEN (Second level of Full Swap) - These individuals will engage in everyting up to and including intercourse with the opposite spouse or significant other. Most require their spouse or significant other to be on the permises but not necessarily in the same room. Physical attraction, chemistry, and friendship are often important. YELLOW (Third level of Full Swap) - These individuals will engage in everything up to and including intercourse with the opposite spouse or significant other. Spouses or significant others are usually required to remain on the premises but not necessarily in the same room. Physical attraction and chemistry are usually important. On-going friendship usually not important and often not even desired. RED (Forth level of Full Swap) - These individuals have an open relationship. They play alone or together. They are free to have sex with whomever they choose, whenever or wherever they please, as long as they inform their spouse or significant other. Most are okay with casual encounter and do not desire on-going friendships. BLACK (Anything Goes) - These individuals have no rules or requirements at all. They will have sex with anyone, anywhere, at any time. COBALT (Bisexual) - This individual is bisexual. The person may be male or female. He or she may be single or attached. This color simply signifies that the individual will engage in sexual activity with member of the same sex. LIGHT GREEN (Generic Wristband) - This individual is a swinger but does not wish to be indentified in any other respect. If you want to know what this person will engage in you will have to ask. Reasons for wearing a generic band vary. Sometimes the individual's swing style depends on the venue. Sometimes these individuals will move from one catagory to the other, depending on how and by whom they are approached. Some individuals simply enjoy a sense of mystery and the process of discovery, and some resent catagorization.