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Swinger & 🦄 Bait - An experiment to attract swingers and unicorns. - [quote=Smartflirts]Glad people like the post...sometimes these forums (okay most of the time...) are so boring. We all need a little levity. Plus there are so many quirky funny things about the LS. We are trying to have more fun with it and even poke fun at ourselves. We are also trying to get a good following of LS folks on Instagram so we can start sharing fun things to do you n the SLC area and hopefully create some informal weekend gatherings at local clubs and stuff. Follow us on Insta @edm.lyfe. It’s a private account not but as long as you aren’t our family or friends with our family we will accept your request to follow us.[/quote]
Smartflirts thanks for finally bringing some life to these forums. This has been fun to follow. Keep it coming 😂
Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - [quote=BENT]SUMINDYFUN: To attempt to better answer your question, this is what we've experienced/learned in our poly-type relationships...
This is so much more of a complex subject than just a quick "blurb", we like to compare it to guessing a 4 combination lock, you know at least 1 or 2 of the correct numbers... but do you really??? You find out an amazing amount about YOURSELF through this process!
We have seen just about everything emerge, from complete unbelievable bliss to complete unbelievable hurt. However, what we've learned is TOTAL honesty, trust, respect, patience and absolute untethered communication are key! These things can either make or break it and breaking it earlier rather than later is a good thing, because if it breaks later then it usually means one or more people missed one or more of the fore-mentioned items and will cause much greater hurt because of all the time/work that was put in by the others.
BTW, apparently the bliss is much more powerful than the hurt because we keep trying and trying for some reason? Yep, its like a drug and we're addicted! This is why we dont fault any one for not wanting to "step through that door" so to speak. We suggest to any one that they open that door very, very slowly and even walk away for a bit before entering fully.
ABCMAN: You hit the nail directly on the head... from our experiences, social conditioning is extremely difficult for most people to overcome.[/quote]
Thank you BENT! We agree with you 100% on the honesty and communication aspect. We have been so happy in the year we have been with our couple, but there have been some bumps and mis communications along the way. Fortunately we were able to deal with them and learn from them rather well. We realize that a Poly relationship is very complex and risky, but the rewards outweigh the risks for us. Wishing you guys good luck in your search!
Married men, solo time - What do you think? - Swingers talk a lot about commitments and open relationships. However they are in a minority position when it comes to numbers. If you are married and want a divorce and your partner will not give you one, should you be forced to have her approval to swing? It is easy for us to say do this or do that. But some things are not easy to do. I spent 10 years being emotionally separated from my wife before my divorce. Due to certain circumstances, divorce was not even a consideration during that period of my life. But for me, sex with others was not a consideration either. However, I sure understand why some men would make it an option. We all have opinions and there are no easy answers and no right or wrong ones that are set in stone. There are only the ones that are right for you. It sounds to me that you have already made up your mind though.
Hood Piercing 911. I need advice.......... - - "In case you haven't been told this, you really come off sounding like a Darwin Reject Prick. Get over yourself. Stop questioning why SWINGERS allow the female half to have sex with other men"
I get the swingers way I just didn't see why separate rooms were aa BIG thing.
As far as the rest, it was only a question why so defensive sounds like YOU'Re the one with some issue's to work through.
I have Plenty of swinger friends.
Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - I guess I will make a much stronger response. The lifecoach is full of shit! My wife and I are both on second marriage and the previous ones fell apart because of cheating. It wasn't the sex it was the lies, the betrayal of trust. My wife and I love each other like crazy. Swinging is a recreational activity we could do without if we no longer like it. Even during swinging I am only sharing my wife's body, her heart belongs only to me and vise versa.
We didn't get into swinging to FIX anything. We got into it because we wanted to add to what is already great for us. It was not a replacement for something missing. our premise is making friends and if we have sex fine and if not we have a friend to do things with.
Also if anything swinging made me love my wife even more. Her love and trust for me cannot be affected even by me having sex with others. We have a couple of times swung (if that is the word) separately and she came back to tell me about it and did so with my knowledge that is what she was doing. And of course vise versa. We still trust each other and love each other. Plus while swinging I can see other men, or women, pleasing her and get a view of what she looks like from a different point of view than I have when making love to her.
As others have said, as long as you communicate, don't take things too personal, and maintain trust swinging will be fun and not hurt your relationship.
When I say don't take it personal I mean like one poster said you should be able to say "she give good head" or she is talented. LOL we had been with a guy in a threesome and the guy did something that I have never done and made the wife Cum really fast and hard. When she had recovered she blurt out without thinking "You have GOT to learn how to do that!!!!!"
It kind caught us both off guard but we laugh about it now. She didn't say "I love him more" She said "DAMN he has a technigue that send me through the roof!"
I have learned from the guy how to do it and have used the technique several times. Even if I can't duplicate it so what? She still LOVES what I do to her too. More importantly we still LOVE each other totally.
OK OK I willget off the soapbox. It just ticks me off that people who are supposed to be great at teaching relationships most of the time have relationships that suck yet they can tell you how to do it. BULL. Save the money for the LifeCoach and take a trip with a plane full of swingers and go to HEdonism III. It would be money better spent.
LOL I will quit now.
Here's something Ive been curious about - - Well we have been doing this hmmmmmmmmm 15 years and don't consider ourselves to be Swingers either, not that there is anything wrong with that. We without putting a label on it, consider ourselves to be sexually open minded couple. We have played with couples and singles but we don't play with everyone we meet. And yes some of the singles we played with we don't even now consider them lifestyle or swinger just curious wanting to experiment so they did. Most of all we enjoy the social openness that this affords us the opportunity to meet others in a physical way and the friendship we have made. Plus being able to experiment and share fantasy's of are own. If you find something more exciting than sex, keep it to yourself, we are having way too much fun!
Why is being a YOUNG SINGLE MALE so difficult enter the swinging - Just a good random converstation starter :-) - See if i want to get laid... I do not need a swingers site to do it. I am here for the fact to get myself in the swingers lifestyle. Who knows maybe meet a girl who is possibly able to liberate me from the single male status :p . I just always had a fantasie about a orgy / swingers party.
Staying a couple in the lifestyle - - [quote=Sofutosuwappu]Our experience so far:
Religious > naturist > meet naturists/nudists who are swingers > soft swap > non-religious > full swap with couples same room > full swap separate room
Thoughts?[/quote]
Wow - what a great thread Sofutosuwappu! I just read some of these responses today. We're actually shocked! Evil - 60 couples . . . WOW! This has not been our experience at all.
While we are relatively new in the LS (since 2015) and we definitely have less LS play experience than most who have commented - our experience has been very different from that described . . . both in terms of our own evolution, but also in terms of what we have personally witnessed with friends.
ALL of the couples we have met in the LS are still together and in loving long-term relationships (as far as we know). Part of that may be dumb luck . . . part of it may be in the 'rules' we set for ourselves. We don't play separately . . . part of the fun is seeing your partner receive joy, pleasure, and excitement! We also specifically seek out people in Long Term relationships . . . and we have stayed away from profiles that intimated a DTF (down to fuck) kind of mind set. Not that there is anything wrong with that - we don't judge . . . just not something we have been interested in. We are attracted to beautiful relationships.
As for our own evolution . . we are STILL very religious, we jumped into the LS first . . . and THEN became nudists 🤣 We have made only a slight adjustment to our play style from our first adventure, and we have no interest in becoming 'non-religious' - we have found the LS to be a continuation or advancement of our understanding of the Judeo-Christian commandment to 'Love One Another'. Maybe we just haven't been in long enough . . . maybe we are self-deluded and are secretly living a life of cognitive dissonance . . . but so far so good.
One HUGE change is that when we first started in the LS . . . we thought we would want to be completely anonymous . . . going so far as to create 'fake names' etc. (I know . . . but we were still virgins . . . we feel SOME guilt about that . . . but we have subsequently repented!😉) We thought that the less people knew about us . . . the better. That changed 180 degrees within the first 6 months of our stumbling into this LS. Now . . . we only seek friends . . . who can be genuine friends . . . and if that progresses to any type of sexual exploration . . . all the better . . . but the friendship rules.
I'm sure we still have a lot to figure out in this regard - but we cherish our new and longer-term friendships . . . and honestly can't wait to spend time with these people. We are missing the summer live concert venues . . . and we can't wait till the next time we meet with friends. If that makes us 'poly-amorous' . . . then consider us 'guilty as charged' - We have somehow managed to maintain significant and deep friendships with just about everyone we've played with. We don't see that changing.
Hope that helps - thought it might as far as providing an alternate perspective. We love the authenticity and honesty shown to us by friends in the LS - we honestly have a hard time now maintaining vanilla relationships . . . whats the point??🤷♂️
Thank you all for the riveting discussion!
another club under fire - club in peoria - [quote=NAUGHTYGIRL101][quote=CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL]Obviously, the Peoria city fathers have never heard of the Constitution.
#1. - It's a PRIVATE club, which means it's not open to the general public.
#2. - Nothing that happens inside is within view of the general public.
#3. - The club's proximity to the police station has NOTHING to do with ANYTHING.
#4. - Swinging and/or swapping partners is NOT illegal.
It will be really interesting to see what the exact wording of the ordinance is.
It will also be laughable.
[b]FLASH:[/b] "Consenting adults arrested for having consensual sex behind closed doors."
Film at 11:00.[/quote]
I always forget how spoiled ya'll in Florida are...Constitution or not they can and will shut this place down...look at Utah...we have NO swingers clubs and as of now Ogden has no strip clubs...talk about conservative...oh wait, I DON'T LIVE IN UTAH ANYMORE...roflmao I keep forgetting that lol[/quote]
It just happened in Vegas too! No more swing clubs.
Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - We are interested in a setup like this as well!
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