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Thank you Lifestyle. - A commentary about our journey - Thanksgiving just passed us by and Xmas and the New Year are quickly approaching. I thought I would take a long moment of my time, and your time if you are reading this, to tell this massive entity, called the "Lifestyle" how it has changed me this year. We have been in the Lifestyle for a little over a year and a half. We don't even like the name lifestyle. We prefer "kinky" or "adventurous" or even just "fun as hell", but it seems the term will be around for awhile longer. The wife and I often ponder what exactly the Lifestyle is. Is it a certain set of rules and guidelines that we all live in? Is it the same for us as it is for everyone else? How often does it hurt marriage or relationships and how often does it help? Do we regret our decision to enter into it? When we first tip-toed into the waters we were intimidated, in awe and totally unprepared for what we would experience. It all seemed magical and sometimes scary. We have and had a great marriage and thought we wanted a new, kinky adventure together. We planned to go slow and we would be fine, we were certain. But we were nervous. We were so sloshed at our first Sinful party that we irritated a few people there, no doubt, and probably made asses of ourselves. We still do that sometimes, but now we do it conscientiously. But we grew and learned quickly and have morphed into what we are today (huge asses). Interestingly enough, a few years before we entered the LS, we thought swingers were all gross, dirty, sexually infected people ( I am still not ruling some of you out). We had met a couple that harassed us at every opportunity and were the "creepy" type. Now we know people may think of us the same way if they found out, which is sad, because we like to be honest and open with all of our friends. So, like many of you, it is a secret we keep. It is a trade off for doing what we do. So what have I learned? How have I changed? I have always been a non-judgmental person by most standards, but still I had strong opinions about certain things. One spouse, one partner; that is how it should be done. So what changed? First off, our communication started to blossom about all sorts of things once my wife left her religion. I won't mention names, but it begins with an L and ends in DS. We talked and talked and talked and the more we talked the more we realized that we both had kinky minds and that maybe we should "experiment". So, we made some rules, actually a LOT of rules, and entered the ring. Still thinking one spouse, one partner, but maybe, just maybe we could play in the same room as other people. How kinky is that? Hence our name...sameroomonly. Well, as some of you know, the lifestyle is a monstrous, living, breathing beast and can quickly drag you to places you never thought possible. We made some mistakes, had some great times and just fumbled our way through for a few months trying to figure out where our lines were and what we should or shouldn't do. Then we got smart. We learned to communicate again, like we used to do privately, only now we could do it with other people around. And it was refreshing. No more secret code words (well, sometimes) and no more wondering if what one of us was doing was not condoned by the other. So that is the first thing I think the LS has helped us with. Communication. We communicate like mother fuckers. Better than all of our non-lifestyle friends, for the most part. Are we always amazing and never have bumps? Of course not. Anyone who says they never have drama are either liars or delusional. So thank you lifestyle for our ability to exchange ideas and to be more honest with each other, always. The next thing we found was that we were making friends at a very fast pace. We made a kik group and had our first party with about 40 people up in Park City only 5 or so months after joining the website. It was a blast. We still host parties and invite new people all the time. We enjoy introducing new friends with old friends. Wait, did I say friends or fuck buddies? Don't we sleep with all of our friends? Isn't that the expectation? Not for us. We have made friends that we know will be around until we are all old and gray. We have lost friends because we wouldn't fuck. There are whole discussions on these forums about how some just want to meet and fuck, because this is a swinging site, not a friend site. And to each their own. We don't judge, but for us the rewards of our friendships have far outweighed the 10 or 20 seconds of amazing sex. We have friends around the world that we never would have met without the LS. So to the lifestyle, I say thank you for all of the wonderful friends we have made. Love you all, some more than others ( you know who I am talking about). :) The LS has also taught me to be less judgmental and to avoid using words like "never" or "always". Life is full of gray areas and has lost much of its black and white features. Oh sure, I still judge, have preferences and prejudices, but we all do. I just really believe in walking in another's shoes before I make any decisions about someone's life. So lifestyle, thank you for making me more understanding of other people. Last of all, I just want to say that the sexual journey has been amazing. We have shared many hot, sexy and intimate times with some of you and we have come to realize how similar we all are. We all like sex, we all have a kinky side, or else we wouldn't be here. I have done things that I never imagined would ever happen, with some of the sexiest, most beautiful people I have ever met. I have shared intimate moments with people I care deeply about and others that were just passing through. All have their high points. I have experienced more than most people would even dream about, as have most of you. We are the select who choose to follow our dreams and fantasies. I think we are fortunate. So lifestyle, thank you for all the amazing sex. In the end the lifestyle is different for everyone. It is a whole sub universe in the middle of a "normal" society. Sometimes we have to walk among the shadows to keep our secret, but totally worth it. I would never trade the LS for my wonderful marriage and think I am the luckiest man alive to be married to my beautiful, amazing wife who has shared this journey with me. Love you, Babe. As with everything in life, there will be people who read this and like it, some who don't care and some who disagree or will want to pick it to pieces. That is what makes this amazing. There are so many wonderful, different people and the lifestyle is a perfect diving board to jump into the sea of waiting bodies and personalities. So if you are new, jump in, explore and learn. If you are old school, help others to weather the bumps and keep exploring. Long live the lifestyle. That is a little about my journey, how about you? I encourage anyone to add what they think or feel the LS has done for them, even negative things. Merry xmas to everyone and hope to meet some of you new people. And to my friends, I care about each and every one of you. The Mr.

Vegas JP/TSC National Swingers Convention - August 5-9-, 2009 - On another Vegas note, any locals know of hotel deals for October? Heading down for one weekend of fun... Mav

Any Swingers out there? Golf swingers that is... - - Well sign me up for wet t-shirt golf! I think we could all have some fun out on the greens!

Combining Lifestyle & Non-Lifestyle Friends - - [quote=SLCJEEPER]Ah, good topic AC! We're happy to have met many people here that we now consider good close friends that we don't have to hide from when we see them at the mall while we're out with our kids. LoL! It's nice to find those who can be vanilla because our whole life isn't about swinging. So, yes, we have had success in blending swingers into our vanilla lifestyle and we hope to find more:) Joe & Debbi [/quote]guess we've been lucky too! We've found a number of friends who we are able to see in a "vanilla" setting, as well....and never had to worry about any "beans" gettin' spilled... As every profile says..."discreation is a must........"

Female sex fantasies. - What do women really think about sex? - We understand and respect that a lot of swingers, possibly more women than men, really don't like comments posted on their profiles. The whole kiss and tell mindset. Still, comments about a couple, at least somewhat verify, that both the wife and the husband are willing partners in this adventure. As for time spent online, there are far fewer wives that seem to spend more time online in this site than their husbands. Once Mrs. Delicious has established a high level of trust in a FWB relationship, be it couples, singles, whatever, she has no problem just giving people her phone number. As for these chat rooms whose names won't show up due to censorship in threads in the forums, or emails within this site, she has had enough creeper experience, that for her it can be a total buzz kill. Let's face it, people who comment in the forums, can and do get jumped on too. Ladies, that do the initial responding to emails get even more abuse. She will get involved online, if someone contacting us really interest her and she feel like it's a safe and sexy possibility. Possibly, that is why far fewer wives seem to comment in the forums. Honestly, isn't it also mostly, for the same reason far more single men have memberships than single women? Men generally tend to be a bit more sex-centric, and women that have similar libidos are at risk, and judged because of it, even by some within this community? As for control, once we meet someone in the flesh, our lady, as is the case with quite a few swinger couples, tends to sit in the driver's seat more often than not. As for our profile, yes, her sex druthers, are very much the cornerstone!

Swingers - Looking for colorado swingers - Check kinkster.org it's a Colorado based swingers site such as swingular is to Utah

Other Swinger sites in Utah - Anyone tell us of other sites? - if someone were to make a new swingers site for Utah, what functionalities would you want in it ?

Swingers in China - Doh! - - Middle ages....well lets think on that....mmmm...anybody know much about Europe in the middle ages? My favorite quote from this article: "Has my private life changed the way of your life? Has it hurt anyone?" perfectly stated. So long as no one is coerced into participating in these activities who has been hurt?

Those damn single men! - Where do they fit in this lifestyle? - SexyPoker I've never been to a swingers club outside of Dallas Ft Worth, Sans Souci, Iniquity, AfterMidnight, and the PlayPen. Iniquity may not allow single men in, but I know the others do. In those clubs single men are restricted to an area at the bar. They are not to approach any couples or single ladies! Doing so will get you a warning, and then tossed out! I dont normally go to a swingers club alone, I'll take a lady friend with me, she may NOT be a swinger, but she does like to dance, socialize, dress sexy, and enjoys the attention, and the people. When I have gone alone, I find a couple I know and sit with them. The biggest mistake anyone can make, be it a single man or woman or couple is this. They ASSUME that those in the club are looking to go home and get laid by strangers.. When you enter a swingers club planning on getting laid, plan on being disappointed! As a single male myself, I have to be respectful to ALL I encounter! It's like a business, one upset customer tells TEN of thier friends, and they tell more friends, the next thing you know your business is dead. You build customers ONE at a time, you build SWINGER friends ONE at a time. I cant fix the fact that you've had bad experiences, there is no REAL answer. Screening everyone who comes in the club, just means everyone avoids that club. I'm not going to try to changes anyones mind, or how they play, my question is and has been, WHAT or WHY do decide to or not to play with single men? And THANK YOU for your response! Much appreciated. T4Real Now, Now.... Listen and Learn, dont come down on those who choose not to play with single man. This thread is meant for us SMART singles to gain knowlege, and better understand the lifestyle, and those who play in it...

Why make it so HARD? - pic posting - Last weekends party had the idea of a profile party being held where we all would pose for pics with each other, faces protected for those wanting so. Someone brought up the idea that they had signed a morality clause and if they were ever found on a swingers site they would be terminated from their job. They said the company actually has people surfing the various sites looking for employees with pics. I bring this up to defend those that do not want to post pics. However, pics are a must before we meet anyone so there should be no problem in sending a pic to a private e-mail address.