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Habits: Vanilla or Not? - How to tell the difference? - [quote=DANDDMONTREAL]We went to Habits last night because multiple people have mentioned that it's a place that Utah lifestylers like to frequent. As we expected, it was generally difficult to tell the difference between lifestylers and vanillas (though we did recognize a few people from various events). We have no interest in offending a vanilla by making undesired advances. Nor are we looking to flip vanillas. That's just not our thing. We're really only interested in meeting stable couples that have experience in the lifestyle. So the obvious question is, what tricks do people have for differentiating lifestylers from vanillas at Habits?[/quote]
This has been asked here many times before... here's what it boiled down to:
1) You can't tell by looking.
2) If you really want to know, you'll have to ask them.
3) Despite the fact that maybe 5% to 10% of the people there are swingers on any given weekend, it's not a swinger club, so if you're trying to meet swingers, it's very inefficient.
Sorry.. wish there was a better answer.
International Swingers Day - How are you celebrating? - I didn't even know this was a thing.
becoming a poly couple - wanting another woman to join our family - [quote=EVILDOERS]Prolly not a swingers site. There are actually poly communities on the internet where you can start exploring but be forewarned, a lot of polys abhor the notion of swinging almost as much as the vanilla world does.[/quote]HUH? Who the heck are you? The Evil that I know could not POSSIBLY let this post go without some kinda wise-crack or joke! IMPOSTOR I say, IMPOSTOR!
Reject Affair Match - Cheaters are not swingers - What are you guys talking about? What is Affair Match?
Mormons - - What a interesting topic, I have to put in my two cents.
I am from Amesfoort, Holland. I moved to Utah when I was young and grew up in SLC in the winter, returning to Holland some summers. (A unique perspective)
Now with my wife, I have not meet any LDS swingers. But our circle of friends is not LDS ether. But while I was single I meet many Mormon girls that a great interest in me. Some tried to convert me (HAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH.... no)
and some had no intention of converting me, although may have used it as an excuse to talk to me.
There are many benifiets for staying in the church, and growing up non-lds can be a lonely affair in Utah.
I think that many pretend to believe, because they need the support of the community, friends, and family.
But many do want they want behind closed door. And I am sure the Internet is a great escape for them as well.
I have been far and wide in this world, and most people are all the same. Yeah they may not be that open but everyone has to get to their own freedom in their own way and own time. So many of them just chat, and disappear when it comes down to meeting.
But in my single days I had girls from the church meet me in private, and well. :) I used to like to think that is was because I was a hottie. but I think I have come to realize it was them who was hot, and needed release, and trusted me to be quiet about it.
I am sure many think about swinging. But I doubt many would even talk to their spouse about that. The one issue I have with the Church is that they tend to control through fear, and I bet many guys and girls would like to bring up the topic. But fear their spouse will freak and they will be in front of the bishop.
Most be a scary place to be, I am very lucky to have been raised in a very liberal, open, agnostic home.
That upbringing seems to leave so many insecurity's, and doubts about ones self.
anyway sorry to be long winded.
What is up with Utah?! - Swingers in Utah and nowhere else? - There's a lot of great things and people to do here in Utah. Brigham Young was correct when he said "This is the place" to all his numerous wives and children on the swings.
Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - [quote=LAPUA]That's the way it's been for us too. Have given our phone # to a few couples that have said they really want to meet. Haven't heard for them yet but tell ya the couples we have met have been great there's been very few. Still looking for them repeat couples and the one's that are looking for fun in and out of the bedroom. Where the hell are they????[/quote]
Black Ring, Right Hand - How to tell if someone's a swinger - [quote=EVILDOERS]We used to go to the occasional lifestyle takeover/trip and would invariably be issued a wristband upon arrival so that we could get into events at the hotel or resort. It usually took about half a day for word to leak out, first among hotel employees and then later the general public, that swingers were around the area and that they could be identified by their wristbands. I guarantee if the black ring thing took off that very soon there would be multiple internet stories as well as likely regular news outlets that "swingers" wear black rings on their right hands and there goes any anonymity. The VAST majority of swingers would then not dare wear the accessory for fear of being seen/identified in public as a swinger. MUCH easier to just attend private swinging events where you have a reasonable assurance that all or most in attendance are indeed swingers rather than spend a lot of time cruising the bars or whatever looking for people wearing black rings. [em]Emo_67[/em] [/quote]
Yeah, i point this out every time this is brought up. As soon as the secret hand shake is out, it becomes useless.
I heard about the black ring, upside down pine4, flamingo, and white rocks almost twenty years ago, before I ever dreamt of considering swinging. (I keep seeing people say it was created recently, but it has been around for a long time).
Thing is, you can think you've got some kind of secret code, or secret meeting place, but the public already knows.
But if people want to wear black rings, I say go for it. Unfortunately, I still have to value discretion, so advertising of any kind in public won't be happening any time soon.
Wear your damn masks! - COVID-19 and your junk! - We can’t just wander around COSTCO not wearing a condom and give the people around us an STD. Yes as lifestyle people we are already somewhat predisposed to a somewhat riskier social life than what a lot of other people might find acceptable for themselves. With a virus that’s airborne it’s not that difficult to pass it along with out the consent or such close proximity a sex to those around us. Hence, the mask recommendations. Swingers that don’t understand respect an or consent, will tend create drama.
Required info for swingers - - Very educational for sure lmao
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