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Vanilla "life" just doesn't taste as good! - What else doesn't "taste" as good? - The dirty little secret of the lifestyle (Okay, there are a LOT of dirty little secrets! LOL) is that it's VERY hard to go back to Vanillalandia and not become bored to death. We've known SO many swingers who "quit" the lifestyle and no longer want to have recreational sex with others but nonetheless still try to hang out with swingers and go to swing parties and such. *shrug*
[img]https://media1.tenor.com/images/856456b4fac99f838d6946c988a34f7b/tenor.gif?itemid=8607839[/img]
On Premise Swingers Club - SLC - I have been on the receiving end of City attempts at regulation of a club in another state. I believe the only way that one could truely avoid the heavy hand of the morality police is being organized as a church or truely a private club which whould require some form of selection process of club members. Even this would not keep you out of trouble, only grant you leverage in court.
There is a case law study avaialable that can give you some overview of the current case law. http://www.moralityinmedia.org/nolc/caseStudies/swingersPack.pdf
Renting a location per event is likely the best way to avoid problems. However I know how hard it is just to setup a dance on a per event basis, an on-premise event would be much more work. The effort may be worth it, especially if you have a lot of people to help.
One way we made this work was a once a year event where we rented out a hotel during the off-season. The innkeeper was very comfortable with us being there and we were the only people that could get a room that week-end every year. We had the full use of the convention center and the swimming pool.
Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - Interested as well
Swingers now officially a high risk group for STDs and STIs - Do your own research - Perhaps more accurately, you were "STD (actually STI is a more current and descriptive term) free" at that moment you were tested (many STI's have various incubation periods before they are seriologically detectable-HIV can take up to 6 months). Additionally many STI's (most strains of HPV) there is currently no test for. So you are STI free for only those STI's that were tested for in your panel. There are MANY intections that can be spread sexually that one wouldn't normally consider an STD. Sorry, don't mean to shit in your Cheerios but far too many of us have a severe case of cognitive dissonance when it comes to STI's in the lifestyle. Swinging (and life, as pointed out by CHETDO) is a risk. You can minimize the risk somewhat by adopting certain protocols and behaviors but never decrease it to zero as long as you continue to swing. If you swing you must accept that you are engaging in risky behavior and be okay with that. We've been around the scene actively and inactivley for a long time and have seen and heard it all as far as those who would delude themselves that taking any of the above actions (other than monogamy) would make them safe from STI's. The sad truth is that MOST of us (if not all) have been exposed to and likely carry some form of STI already. If this were not the case they would offer Gardisil to adults. So that horse has likely already left the barn, so to speak. It's a little like riding a motorcycle. If you don't want to be involved in a motorcycle accident, don't ride. If you don't want an STI don't swing. Helmets (condoms) can help but some asshole can still run over you. [em]Emo_67[/em]
"Swinger Robots"?? - WtF?, Now, on top of everything else, we have to worry about Robot Swingers? - Tmaca, love the quote!
swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - WAAAA babies is that all u whiners are
bunch of panty waste if i have ever seen, all talk
u all talk freedom of speech now that some is standing up to u panty waste u all rebel and do not like it
ummm very funnylol, lol, lol
Friend collectors or swingers - - We feel that we have "friends" who we don't even know. We'll get a friend request and then nothing else. Together we have been in the lifestyle for over a year. We started in September 2019 and hit the ground running. Before we got together Scott was on here as a single guy but had met a number of amazing people. So we went to a party which was my first swinger experience. I was nervous but it turned out to be one of the best nights ever. We kept playing and meeting new people then the pandemic hit and we take it seriously. We will meet new people but not in large gatherings.
What really defines a TRUE swinger? - - [quote=INVITESOME]We never have viewed single males as swingers. To to us and most of our swinging couple friends single males are cheap sex toys you carefully pick from, use them on rare occasions and then return them and forget them. Sounds harsh but the great thing is that is exactly what the majority of single males that we have all met like. We have only met a couple single males out of hundreds that have broken the mold and surprised us. [/quote]
For the record at least our experience we have met far more
couples where one or the other of them is just plain weird than
singles. In fact we almost prefer singles over couples for that
reason. Either way life is too short for bashing fellow Lifestylers.
People should take their bad attitudes & imagined desirability somewhere
else!
Soft Swap Couples - - [quote=Tall519]We are new to this and I feel like an idiot but what’s a “soft swap”?! Depending on what it is we could be as well...[/quote]
Most swingers consider it to be play that includes anything up to but not including penetrative sex. So basically, anything goes except actual fucking between non-primary partners.
Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - [quote=BENT]SUMINDYFUN: To attempt to better answer your question, this is what we've experienced/learned in our poly-type relationships...
This is so much more of a complex subject than just a quick "blurb", we like to compare it to guessing a 4 combination lock, you know at least 1 or 2 of the correct numbers... but do you really??? You find out an amazing amount about YOURSELF through this process!
We have seen just about everything emerge, from complete unbelievable bliss to complete unbelievable hurt. However, what we've learned is TOTAL honesty, trust, respect, patience and absolute untethered communication are key! These things can either make or break it and breaking it earlier rather than later is a good thing, because if it breaks later then it usually means one or more people missed one or more of the fore-mentioned items and will cause much greater hurt because of all the time/work that was put in by the others.
BTW, apparently the bliss is much more powerful than the hurt because we keep trying and trying for some reason? Yep, its like a drug and we're addicted! This is why we dont fault any one for not wanting to "step through that door" so to speak. We suggest to any one that they open that door very, very slowly and even walk away for a bit before entering fully.
ABCMAN: You hit the nail directly on the head... from our experiences, social conditioning is extremely difficult for most people to overcome.[/quote]
Thank you BENT! We agree with you 100% on the honesty and communication aspect. We have been so happy in the year we have been with our couple, but there have been some bumps and mis communications along the way. Fortunately we were able to deal with them and learn from them rather well. We realize that a Poly relationship is very complex and risky, but the rewards outweigh the risks for us. Wishing you guys good luck in your search!
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