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Friendship vs. spontaneity? - Are you here to make friends or just to fuck? - The perception of this lifestyle is that there is a whole lot of sex going on between everyone. Maybe if you are young slim and trim and willing to go to bed with everyone at the drop of a hat that is true. But that pretty much describes the young anyway. If that is your perception of all swingers, and you are here in Utah, then you are bound to be disappointed.
I think that this question comes up a lot because it is not a simple question for many of us and it seems to be posted by those seeking friends first. The end goal may be sex. But if that is your only goal then why do you say you are seeking friends. Friendships are not made in 30 seconds or a drink over at the pub. If that is what makes friendships in your mind then you are really just here for sex.
For us it is finding friends. Some folks that we meet we will play with and some we will be just friends with. It really boils down to a 4 way vote when it comes to the bedroom and maybe even being friends in the first place. And that is what makes finding friends and bedroom partners difficult. There is always the added fear of rejection that gets in the way when you want to anything anyone.
I look at all the complaints of one-nighters and couples that never speak again after sex. I can only surmise that for those folks sex is the only yard stick of friendship. You do not have to be sexually compatible to be friends.
We have found that if what you are looking for is friends, then it is easy to be part of the lifestyle. If what you are looking for is based on having sex then it is easy to be disappointed and difficult to be part of the lifestyle.
Furthermore we look at those that just want to screw and think how lonely their existence must be.
DAMMIT EVIL - You should have updated your map app. - Before you give everyone the impression that swinging husbands [url=http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/swingers-heading-sex-sessions-farm-5630435]have to ask for directions[/url].
The males of couples I need your help!! - I am trying to understand my husband and male pride.But been that I am not a male this is hard.So please help. - First: We were childhood sweethearts. (At the age of 12.) We are best friends. We have been together for 10 years,been married for 8 years.For the ten years we have only be with each other.Before we were togrther I had been with 5 men (I do mean men.When I was a teen,I went out with men : 18 to 23.) Before we were togrther he had been with 7 girls.I was with one woman and Chris was there but we had to stop before we got started.(she only when down on me and Chris was watshing but then I told him to go down on her,so he did.Then we had to stop because someone was try to come in the room.We were at a house party.This is why we are here.
Second: We are in the same place regarding swinging.I only want to be with another woman.I do not want to be with another man.(We both are not ready to have another man with us.)I just thought it would be easyer to fine a couple to do what we want.Then to find a single female.Because every where I go everyone is saying the samething " There are not as many single females looking for coupls as there is couples looking for single females."Please reread the post.It saids that We want to be with a single bi-female..... I only want the women to play and the men to watch......
Third: Nothing can get in the way of our marraige.We would never leave each other.We have been through too much together.At 18 we got back together and we had our frist miscarrage.At 19 we had our frist son and our son and I almost die and we had our second miscarrage and was told by a DR. that I could not have any more children.For 4 year we had sex maybe once a month because it hart to have sex.(When we had sex it was over real fast because he did not want to hurt me.)He never steped out on me.He never thought to step out on me.at 23 we had our second son.What ever was wrong with me was gone because it did not hart to have sex any more.At 25 we had our daughter and I almost die having her.For the past 2 years we have wild sex almost every night.After having kids we finely got our sex life back.Now if only I can get my body back. LOL <(That is a joke Chris loves my body)
Chris is the best man out there for me.I should know because I have been looking for a husband since I was 16.All the men I went out with only cared about themselves and what they could get.Chis cares about me and trys to give me everything I want.THAT IS WHY WE ARE HERE.Because he is trying to give me what I want.He is the type of person that would give you the would if he could.
Just so you know we as a couple have researched the swingers lifstyle for a year before we as a couple decieded to join the swingers lifestyle.
We wrote this together.I just typed it .
Candy & Chris
Younger LS meet-up? - - Dang, saw this topic was active and got super pumped to meet a similarly-aged LS group! Shameless plug: we made a Swingular group called "Millennial Swingers" for couples/single women in their 20s-30s. If there's enough interest I'll get around to making a Kik group or something for outing coordination.
Polyamory - polyanorous couples. - [b]By general definition all swingers are polyamorous.[/b]
Polyamory (from Greek ???? [poly, meaning many or several] and Latin amor [love]) is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.
Polyamory is a less specific term than polygamy, the practice or condition of having more than one spouse. The majority of polygamous cultures are traditionally polygynous, where one husband has multiple wives. Polyandrous societies, in which one wife has multiple husbands, are less common but do exist. Marriage is not a requirement in polyamorous relationships.
Swing Clubs - - We have never been to a swing club. We usually prefer more intimate settings, but I have wanted to see what it is like. Possibly easier than meeting couples online?
What is everyones take on them, and what is the proper ettiquette regarding meeting and approaching people in the swingers clubs.
Also which vegas/pheonix clubs are the best?
Thanks guys!:p
Mrs.T
Fantasizing about Foursomes - interesting advice - Interesting article inside - Reminds me of our ? to the forum. which was are swingers more spiritual than others vanilla couples?
ANSWER: Not nessecary but what the relationship of spiritual not to be mistaken for religous by anymeans, does for any person or couple is absolute mindblowing and is incredible. Spirituality definitly strengthens an indiviual when a couple are truely HERE AND NOW, AWAKE, IN THE PRESENT MOMENT, etc.. call it what you like but not religous lol. The out come of any relationship sexual, friendly, business, etc.. that you cross among has no bearing on your choices. It has enhanced Tre and I's relationship to levels never dreamed of and we dream big NOW. so I say that if a couple breaks up over swinging well it was just meant to be and they only put the thrusters in it. It would have been the outcome for any reason in the future if they didn't swing too.
"So remember this ,,,Everythings happen for a reason and there is no such thing as an accident"
kisses,
Jessica and Tre smile truth is truth:D
swinging: It's not for everyone - - Ain't THAT the truth? Swinging is NOT for everyone. Many people it seems are only one or two drinks away from major drama or worse! That's why it's so funny to see the threads from the "vanilla hunters". They think it's way more fun to go out and try to seduce vanillas (cause, hey, everybody really wants to be a swinger deep down, right?) than fuck other swingers, often using copious amounts of alcohol to accomplish their task and effectively taking at least some of their prey's free will away. Hey we're all consenting (with enough alcohol on board) adults. All's fair in love and swinging. Right? LOL
trouble finding play mates in your area - - Our next door neighbors to the south east of us are not swingers. Our next door neighbors to the north west of us are not swingers. I did however see am attractive 40 something neighbor lady across the street and to the east of us get dropped off by another couple one night and the other woman gave her a pretty deep goodbye kiss. Think I will have to shovel her walks more often this winter.
Single Males vs. Unicorns - this is ridiculous - This site is no different than any other swingers site. I'm afraid that you will find good and bad in all groups, be it single males, single females, or couples. There are those that give their perspective groups a bad name, but unfortunately, little can be done about it, as it can be hard to verify who is for real and what someone's intentions are, without knowing them in person.
In my time in the lifestyle, I have observed...single males who were actually in relationships but looking for secret side action, single females, who seem to have a husband/bf who's looking to join...but she still lists as single, and couples who believe that simply because they bring someone along to a party...it gives them free range to do as they please. On the flip side, I have met some very nice people from all 3 groups as well.
My point is...all 3 of these groups have their roles in the lifestyle, but until a foolproof way comes along of determining who's for real and who's not...we will all have to deal with the good and the bad. As others have mentioned though...if you are object to a particular group and don't want to hear anything from members of that group...block/ignore them. Just remember that you are throwing out the good along with the bad.
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