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Is this one of your rules? What is it? is it fear? or something - Does everyone feel this way? -

242,

We (Tami and I) have never ran across anyone that said they didn't want to have sex and only wanted to make friends. We have ran across those that want to be friends (have trust established), first. The latter I can totally understand, as we are two people that require trust in people we play with. We also find attraction in the personality and minds of the individual. Have there been exceptions for us? Yes, however, we have found that "spur of the moment" play was unsatisfying and regrettable. We try not to label people. We just avoid those that are into something we are not. Just as a couple not into anal sex would avoid sexual contact with those seeking anal. We avoid those that want to hook-up on first meetings without inhibition. Why? There are forceful individuals, there are deviants, there are bi-sexual males that think they can touch without permission, there are people who drug others, there are people that smoke pot and others that can't be around it due to their profession. The latter doesn't have to end a friendship as we happen to be in professions that don't allow exposure, we just had to perfect a little dance with our pot smoking friends. Many people view this as a "lifestyle". We certainly view the "free thought and expression" as a "lifestyle" but the "sex with others", is a recreational thing that we can turn on and off like a switch. Sometimes we feel like playin with our swingers buddies and sometimes we just like talking, drink and having other types of fun with them. Swingers or "Libertines", as I like to refer to them, are mostly "free thinker" types so I like to interact with them on other levels as well. Though there are still those types that only swing for the sex and still have closed minds in regard to everything else. Those are the types I find strange. How you can be a conservative swinger is beyond me. However, I respect anyone's desire to fuck. So I do not judge. I just decide who fucks me and my wife. That's all. We all can't be compatible with everyone on all levels, all the time. It's impossible. Whether it's fucking or writing in the forum, there is always gonna be someone that doesn't like you. Trust me, I know this first hand. So, like ole Rick Nelson once said... You can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself. That's a rule to fuckin live by.
-Don-

Boca Raton - - WOW, you guys from UT are animals!!! He gave you 5 places to check out and it's not enough!!! It would take us laid back Fl swingers a year to cover that list,,,,,LOL

Cosplay ? - - [quote=HOTFIRELOVERS]Dressing up goes with the territory of swingers. Guess it's time for a cosplay party!!!! [/quote] That's a good idea. Let's plan something in conjunction with Comic Con. We'll all dress up in slutty cosplay outfits, wander around the Salt Palace flirting and stuff and then go to a hotel suite and have nasty fantasy/sci-fi sex. [em]Emo_12[/em]

Threaded messenger - We want threaded messenger - [quote=FIT_N_FUN]“There are some really damaged people” on Fetlife? Really? Lmao ... FYI Fetlife is NOT a swinger site, it’s a BDSM site. Just because you don’t share their fetish doesn’t make them damaged. 🙄[/quote] It's actually a lifestyle site and swinger is one of the designations to choose from when setting up a profile. We've met and played with a lot of swingers from that site, so I'd say it's a viable option for swingers. And to clarify, I'm not referring to their individual kinks. I'm referring to the writings on that site. We've read some deeply disturbing things on that site and if you're an active member, you know of at least a couple recent issues that gained a lot of attention.[/quote] I disagree, and we’ve been on Fet for many many years. Fetlife is a kink/BDSM fetish community. Yes, you can designate yourself as a swinger, but the site is in no way a “swinger” site. In fact I think most kinksters on Fet will want nothing to do with swingers who don’t have kinky fetishes, and are just hoping to hook up, Of course there are pure vanilla swingers there, but I sure wouldn’t recommend it as a “swinger” site. Kasidie is a far better swinger site as an alternative to this crap site lol

Do your friends and family know about your lifestyle? - - I found this thread timely, as I just had my first "scare" with being found out by my snooping sister. Instead of typing in Myspace.com she decided to go to the history of our computer and came across Swingular. Curiousity won and she went there, where the opening page shouts "Swingers". She promptly came into the family room where the rest of the family was engaged in prebirthday celebrating and said "anything new?" staring right at me. I of course had NO clue what she meant, to which she proceeded to ask if we were swingers. The only thing that made everyone else in the room tune out is that she started ranting about how 'ever since she's moved she's out of the loop and all hell's broken loose... I sell sex toys, my brother drinks, my sister's stopped going to church (can I call her a self righteous bitch?) Probably good to note here that we all grew up Mormon and now four of the five kids have shaken off the brainwashing in adulthood... thankfully we all just ignored her and I made up some line about my girlfriend having me look up some guy she was dating and dropped it. I spent the rest of the day with my insides in a knot wondering just how much she saw... the saved usernames, did she enter the site and look around? Needless to say that night we removed our public photos and I was in a panic. By morning my panic had turned to rage. Why did I feel the need to run and hide, why should I need to defend myself?! My hubby and I have been married for going on 16 years, 7 of which have been spent in the lifestyle. We are the happiest we've ever been. Our vanilla friends, who have no clue that we practice sex as a team sport, all ask us what our secret to such a happy marriage is. They can see that we have something special. Needless to say, I put the pics back up on the profile the next day. Let 'em look for us. I love my life, I love the sex that is a big part of it, and I wouldn't change a thing. I'm still not standing up at family parties to announce my choices, but I wouldn't stand up and talk about my marital bed anyway. What I do naked is my business and my husbands, that's what counts. I'm proud to be in such a committed and honest relationship. They should all try it! Maybe they'd use less prozac and smile more often! Tricia btw, I feel grateful that I have 2 friends outside of the lifestyle that know what we do. They are valuable to me and prove that they are true friends leaving the rest as just 'people we know' Besides, having a wingman now and then is helpful! Thanks for sharing in my babble...

We are wanting to host small intimate parties - - [quote=UTCPL]Wow, the amount of emails we have received I think maybe we will just rent the convention center. Whoever is interested send us an email. also thinking maybe we should organize some kind of regular play party & rent out a block of rooms somewhere. Anybody want to talk about that mail us. The whole idea was to get away from the meet n greet & just do what everybody really wants & have a play party. [/quote] That sounds like what we've started doing here on this side of the river. You want to come sit and BS that's fine. But we're going to get naked and do what real swingers do. Believe it or not, some people are actually shocked by that.

Excuse me? But are you guys swingers? - Excuse me? But are you guys swingers? - I think that just be respectful and ask straight up if they are in the "lifestyle" . If they aren't they won't know what you are talking about or if they are then you have a straight answer...yes. No one will ever be offended if they don't know what you are talking about. Also you might ask what they are talking about if they seem to be hinting..... Like ask... are you talking about swinging?... I guess it all depends on a number of factors... Are these people neighbors, someone you've just met and don't really know them or them you....Are these acquaintences that you know fairly well that are talking maybe to find out if you are in the lifestyle... So the reaponce is basically conditional... Can they hurt you? If not then what's to loose.

Alaska Swingers - - Finding men in Alaska should be easy since they outnumber the women about 15 to 1. Finding couples might be harder and single women will be nigh unto impossible.

T-Shirt Contest - Help us create some super hot Swingular Apparel & win yours. - brain storming here... Swingers do it together. Swingers play together. Silly rabit, sex is for fun. We play together, wanna join? Have strap-on and know how to use it. Be nice and I'll show you my toy-box. We're open and loving it. blah blah blah.... Hubby's favorite line is "nice shoes wanna fuck?" That's it for me -Mrs. Curious

If your family or non swinging friends found out you swing - - Her mother knows and is totally cool with it, in fact she is usually the one to babysit for us, all she said was to be careful since problems can arise. His parents dont know as they are "card carrying" people so it would not go over well at all. Most of our friends are swingers and people we have met from this site, but the ones that arent are fine with it - one day we will convert them lol.