Hardaway Swingers in Alabama

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Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - That's where he got it. He broke out the thesaurus to show us all on the forum, how educated and deep he is. LOL! Someone used that word to describe him and he had to bust out a Websters... HAHAHA! He wrote: "Kristylynn... Alton... who really gives a shit if one's grammer and or spelling is not perfect..I would offer this.. " a pecksniffian" I think anyone that spells grammar, "grammer", whilst trying to give people vocabulary lessons from a websters reference set, is fuckin' priceless in the dumbshit sense. Way to go buddy. Talk about hypocrisy. Look up the word "irony". Oh and sorry to keep you waiting. LOL! He also wrote: "Some people on here think way beyond their mental ability." I think he proves that point himself. LOL! -D-

Looking for Las Vegas fun - Looking for other swingers in Las Vegas - We live in Vegas, and like meet new people.

Sexy swingers closer to our age - 20-30 year old sexy swingers - WE are 42m 39f, always open to talking to attractive couples around our age!

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - That would be a general definition. However, sometimes the devil is in the details. With that definition, poly couples would be termed in the same group as swingers under the banner of libertine. So would soft swingers, etc, etc. We feel the definitions are kinda important because it causes awkwardness and waste of time if we don't know what we are getting into. For instance, if we talk and you are soft swingers, we now know we won't get anywhere fast because we are not into soft swinging. You, OTOH, will not have the awkward moment where we get together and at the last minute, we do something you don't like. IMO the labels help us filter out what we want from what we don't want.

Age quesiton - Do swingers of the same age group swing together? - New to this and am sure there are volumes of info online to this, but I can't find it. Do swingers typically stay in their own age group, or do you swing with whomever you connect with?

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Bunny, just a couple of thoughts on this. First: When he picks a screen name that defines him as an object ( his dick) and not as a human, he has degraded himself in the eyes of many, especially those who seek to meet new people and make friends. It says that he in only interested in one thing, and that pigeonholes him from the beginning. Second: There are literally thousands of sites for singles only, obviously meaning that couples aren't allowed. Singles can be seen by some to be interlopers, predators, or worse. Third: Loathing or distain might be more accurate to describe the situation. Jumping on the use of hate sounds like self vicitimization. If he is so proud of what he is or has, don't play victim if someone doesn't automatically feel stimulated by him.

On Premise Swingers Club - SLC - I am sure that there are a lot of folks that would support your venture. However you would have your work cut out for you and I hope you have a good law firm working for you and are able to do it. I know that in some places in the USA there are clubs that are held in a large private residence and that is the only way they can exist in those cities. But police have a tendency to treat the whole thing like it is organized crime. I know that we have members of the community that are cops and ex-cops and they should contact you privately and thus may be of some help or guidance. I do know of one case in Utah where all cars parked by the business were photographed by the cops and folks harassed and thus shut down and another where they simply ran the proprietor of a liberal magazine out of business. I wish you luck.

Slowing Things Down - An argument for taking your time. - [quote=CNTRLCPL]That's a lot.... did ya'll cramp up typing this? Whew ! On the topic, we are always friends first... it makes the actual play much better ( in our own humble opinion ) [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]A nice, slow, buildup might be ideal. In the vanilla world, the buildup often begins long before the first date. You meet a co-worker, or a fellow student, or someone who you see at the coffee shop, and there is some immediate attraction, and eventually you connect on a more physical level. If we are hoping to make those sort of connections, within the swinging lifestyle community, then we are going to have to find a way to run into lifestyle people frequently, and casually. If there is no, or limited opportunities to just run into swingers, enough to build relationships like that, then the way we end up meeting is through dating. If you are swiping right and you are vanilla dating, online, if there is shared chemistry and attraction, you will have a second date and so on and so forth. If the chemistry is super hot, even in the vanilla world, people sometimes fuck on the first date. If the sexual intimacy was superb, that might just accelerate the depth of the shared communications, the amount, and the quality of the time together. The way we see it, if there is some super hot chemistry, on a swinging date, if sexual intimacy happens, the same sort of acceleration in the relationship might happen. It might not. If it doesn't and the sex was good, well, good sex beats mowing the lawn. For us, we raised five kids, who all grew up to be happy, healthy successful adults. All but one of our kids have significant others. Some have kids, which makes us grandparents. Our kids and our grandkids, really like us, love us, and we really like and love them, so we spend a lot of time together. We have friends from work and friends from the neighborhood, and we have jobs. Seriously, dating, at the level we dated, when we were wooing each other, in terms of time, well we just don't have it. If non-monogamy was the openly celebrated norm, and friends openly fucked each other, as a normal part of a friendship, then we would all just naturally end up in those sorts of relationships. Well, except the assholes. Assholes don't flow into meaningful relationships. They take advantage of people's vulnerabilities and loneliness. Manipulation isn't friendship. Demanding people, who wish to break you into the vision of their expectations don't want to be your friend. No give, just take. You'll never be able to give them enough. You owe them nothing, and yet, they will shame you for not giving them exactly what they want when they want it. If we can all just avoid the assholes, then what we do get to share with good caring people, is a privilege and for lack of a better term, a blessing. Good people, reaching out, accept and defend each other's vulnerabilities, even if that means some disappointment and patience, and that takes an honest caring person. Sexual desire honestly expressed is surrounded with vulnerability, and romance even more. I changed subjects there for a moment. Since what swingers do is considered taboo, as a social norm, then that leaves dating. Let's face it. Dating is hit and miss, when it comes to making a lasting connection. When four people are involved dating becomes maybe a bit more complicated. We are not apposed to the slow burn buildup. If we meet someone and there is a spark, that is the motivation. If there really is a nice shared spark, and they want to jump ahead and build the fire, we probably won't say no. [/quote][/quote] No cramping.

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - We think the problem is that people see the equation "sex = love". IOW, if I have sex with you, I must love you. Therefore polyamory and swinging are the same. After all, if I don't love you, I won't be having sex with you. The way I see it, swinging is like a game of golf or tennis. I might play a game with you but I don't love you. Similarly, I might have sex with you but I don't love you. Poly, IMO, is basically having a relationship with that other person and sex is involved on some level. Kinda like "I'm in love with you and oh, BTW, lets make love" The way we see it, swinging is about exchanging sexual partners for recreation sex. In an orgy situation at a party, you can have sex with that person with zero words exchanged. In a poly relationship, there is a real connection going on besides just sex. Sex becomes incidental just like it is with married couples. With swinging, there is no emotional attachment. Is that a good thing? Well, it depends. We need to understand the very simple nature of things. We do this to avoid that. That is human nature. Many swingers DON'T want emotional attachments and avoid them because of the complications they cause in the first one. Are there benefits to the attachments? You bet. Is there a price to pay for that benefit? But of course. Is it worth it to you? That depends on your viewpoint. In our life as a couple, the problems poly cause BASED ON OUR OPINION (your's may vary and no right and wrong here) do not outweigh the payoff. IOW, we don't think the benefits of a poly relationship are worth the problems it creates based on our opinion. YMMV

Swinging and Children Don't Mix With Me, What about You? - Unforgettable experience - I have to say, having children and trying to meet with couples can be very hard on your lifestlye. Family always comes first in my book, but it doesn't seem like every parent thinks that, which is why I'm letting you know why they should start thinking about it. We thought that maybe if we could meet with a couple that also have a child or has children, that we could have a better, lasting relationship and have other things to enjoy with these couples, besides just swinging. Well, one couple didn't work out with us and I don't know how to go about letting them know they were wrong in what happened. I'm the only one that even seemed to get upset about the situation and I wanted to get others opionion to make sure I don't owe an opology to them. Here's what happened..... Me and my husband met with a couple at a swingers club, which was off-premise, and we talked some and explained we had children and that we wanted to meet with couples, but it was hard with younsters and it was also hard to find a reliable and trusting babysitter to be able to enjoy the night out. They the told us they had a child and that if we wanted to talk more and get to know each other better, that we could come to their home for a dinner, with our kids. Now...we explained up front that we don't play seperate and we definitely did not play if we had our children with us. They said that it wouldn't be a problem, no hank-panky with kids around, because they too had a small one. This sounded really great to us, because we thought we found a good couple to be friends with and have some extra benefits too, if we wanted. Well, things started out okay. We were greeted at the door by the family, and our kids was introduced to their child, and was showed some computer games and such to play. That gave us time to talk a little to the couple and was shown the outside of their home and such before dinner. After dinner is when everything went WRONG. First, I had to go to the bathroom. Well, while I was gone to the bathroom, the Mrs. decide to give my hubby a tour of the rest of the house, mainly the extra bedroom....and when I asked the hubby where my hubby was, he said.."Don't worry about them, they'll be okay for awhile"...well, that really ticked me off, especially knowing our children were now mixed up in this...and our oldest asking where his daddy went with that lady.....that was about the last straw for me....but I was in these peoples home, not mine, and I respect others homes, but in this situation, I was ready to leave, and without my other half....because he too knew our rules of playing. Well, when the Mrs. and mine came back up, my other half knew I was mad, but for some strange reason, he felt like he had to still play around with her, and in the same room all the children were in!!!! Not to mention, she couldn't keep her hands off him, which was not making my situation of trying to calm down any easier. When I finally got my hubby alone, I "very persistantly" told him me and the kids were leaving...NOW..and if he was smart he had better be out the front door before me or I would leave him there, and I truely meant it. I was so angry and hurt by all of the happenings around me, I thought that if this is what it's like to try and swing...FORGET IT...my nerves or marriage weren't going to stay together if this is what I had to look forward to everytime. My hubby didn't get out the door before me..he was too busy kissing the Mrs good-bye....and I mean french-kissing..... but, thank Goodness I got the kids out the door before me....and that didn't help out any on his part, believe me. We stopped swinging for many years after that because of trust with one another and with other couples saying one thing and then doing another. This particular couple apparently feels that nothing was wrong with what happened, and actually contacted us again after many, many, many years after this incident happened. I'm not one either to "shun" anyone, but this expereince really bothered me then, and still does, and after them contacting us again, through an e-mail, not by phone, it makes me wonder about my feelings on the matter. Am I wrong to feel this way, even after all these years? I do trust my husband NOW, after the bad expereinces, because there was one more after that, but it took alot of talking, yelling, and regaining a trust that is hard to achieve after something that drastic that involved your kids in the process. I e-mailed them back, but I know it was short and blunt, nothing mean, I don't do things like that, but what if they try again to contact us...what do I say? Any help/advice/opinions is appreciated. Hope no one ever has to expereince something like this...most marriages would never have lasted unless you really had a great understanding with your mate, and we put ours to the test and passed.......barely.