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Friendship vs. spontaneity? - Are you here to make friends or just to fuck? - The perception of this lifestyle is that there is a whole lot of sex going on between everyone. Maybe if you are young slim and trim and willing to go to bed with everyone at the drop of a hat that is true. But that pretty much describes the young anyway. If that is your perception of all swingers, and you are here in Utah, then you are bound to be disappointed.
I think that this question comes up a lot because it is not a simple question for many of us and it seems to be posted by those seeking friends first. The end goal may be sex. But if that is your only goal then why do you say you are seeking friends. Friendships are not made in 30 seconds or a drink over at the pub. If that is what makes friendships in your mind then you are really just here for sex.
For us it is finding friends. Some folks that we meet we will play with and some we will be just friends with. It really boils down to a 4 way vote when it comes to the bedroom and maybe even being friends in the first place. And that is what makes finding friends and bedroom partners difficult. There is always the added fear of rejection that gets in the way when you want to anything anyone.
I look at all the complaints of one-nighters and couples that never speak again after sex. I can only surmise that for those folks sex is the only yard stick of friendship. You do not have to be sexually compatible to be friends.
We have found that if what you are looking for is friends, then it is easy to be part of the lifestyle. If what you are looking for is based on having sex then it is easy to be disappointed and difficult to be part of the lifestyle.
Furthermore we look at those that just want to screw and think how lonely their existence must be.
What are swingers really looking for ?Are they looking for frien - Has the happen to you. - Please read our Profile..
We are looking for Single Females for Girl on Girl.
The only place it says anything about couples is at the very bottom and it says We will chat with couples and get together and become friends. (But no sexual stuff.) And we only did this because alot of couples always e-mail us.And we want them to know what we wanted from them before they e-mail us and wasted our time and theirs.We thought we were at the right place for what we are looking for (Single Females for Girl on Girl) so Please tell us what Sites or forums we sould go to if these sites and forums are not the right place. . :(
KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - I wouldn't go as far as saying swinging isn't entirely blameless in breakups. We were counting last summer and the number of swinger friends who've divorced over the years was well past 60 couples. The old adage from way back when we started swinging was, "Swinging can make a good marriage better but will almost always make a bad marriage worse."
any couples iterested? - - Can't spell "CUCK"????? Go to your nearest gay bar and stroke away.... IdaHO good place to be for strokin..... Sounds like a song they play at the swingers club.... "Strokin to the left and strokin to the right strokin strokin to the one that you love best .....Strokin" ... You know the music.....right?... Nothing against bi or gay ...nothing against... just not my cup of Joe....
Swingle males. What's in it for you? - - Interesting. Thanks for the feedback. So are a lot of the chicks in the hookup scene cray cray? "Copping a pregnancy on the sly" is pretty low. Is it that common? Also, the "stranger danger and blind sexual incompatibility" seems like it would be more or less equally as prevalent in the lifestyle. Not to mention STD's stalkers and cheats. What makes you think swingers are inherently more trustworthy in any given situation?
BOGEY\'S TONIGHT - - A bunch of us wild swingers are meeting tonight at Bogey\'s in Clearfield for drinking and dancing. Come join us. We will be there around 930pm-10pm. There will be an afterparty at our house. Hope to see you tonight.
What is your fantasy for 2008? - Many have made resolutions for 2008, but some of us may have made a resolution to fullfill a fantasy. What's yours? - Happy New Year everyone! May 2008 be filled with fantasies fullfilled and desires satisfied.
Ours would be to find a couple who have the desire to do an "actual" full swap. Me (male) with their fem for a night, day, or whatever of conversation, flirting, eye play, and erotic touching leading up to making passionate love to each other and the same for the other halves of both couples.
It seems that most "open-minded" swingers are threatened by this idea. I know that some of you will say, " but we like watching each other." We do too, but think this experience would be hot.
Anyone out there????
Swingers Kickball Society - - Our first kickball game will be this coming Thursday on June 3rd send a message if you want to join the group. Looking for couples.
geting in LOVE while swinging - - Posted By: XPLORR94248 Reply posted on:
Aug 5, 2008 - 7:12 am
Someone mentioned Polyamory. Poly people, at least in most communities, feel that swinging and poly are not compatible.. Fact is, why not? If you are open and honest about your poly leanings and totally honest with your mate and any relationships you may have... then why not poly as well. I know that several people in here and on other sites, swingers feel threatened if you are overtly open abut your feelings. If one truely loves and trusts their partner/SO/wives; husbands/girlfriends; bopyfriends and whatever other relationships that I may have missed, they should not be threatened. If you fall in love with someone that you have sex with.... you have 2 choices..... Tell that person and their spouse and your spouce and see where it goes or simply walk away with the thoughts and get on with your life. The 3rd option is not an option.... If one is poly...thier primary relationship/s take precedence.
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I don't think it is so much of trust and love that is necessary for a poly relationship. There are, in theory at least, benefits. OTOH, NILIF. So, you are going to add complications. Many marriages already are at risk or in divorce. So, it is difficult to handle one person. What about 3? Now, it is a very nice idea to say that whomever the wife plays with is whomever she plays with. However, the reality is that it will have some effect on me. Is it always so easy to divorce yourself from the situation? Yes, in theory, you can say that when you come home, the other people are out of your lives. In practice, it often has a way of creeping back in to the primary relationship.
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - Bottom line is, no matter how big an area you reside in, (it can be the entire state) if you drop dime, it WILL catch up with you! Always best to keep your guts on the inside...
~D&T~
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