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Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - The first step in fixing something is to recognize that it's a problem.
-D-
Help With Wife - Wife has fantasies but is super hesitant to experiment. - [quote=EVILDOERS]Personally I think you might be a little too eager (can't blame you, we all were when we started) and pushing just a little too hard to make her fantasy a reality. Rather than trying to find a way to get around the "Catch 22" of her fantasy maybe just explore it more verbally and see if it evolves into some kind of scenario that she is comfortable with that more easily can happen in the real world.
The most successful swingers we know, ourselves included, arrived at where they are by being open and supportive of each other's fantasies and desires without forcing them in any way. In other words, be patient, explore your fantasies verbally and maybe role play, a LOT, with each other before you jump into anything that either of you isn't quite ready for.
You might be surprised as you fantasize openly and honestly how your fantasies might evolve and become something that you eventually can and will make a reality. You know your wife better than anyone and maybe she does need a little nudge but most of the swingers we've known over the years who've crashed and burned did so because one partner pushed the limits too fast and didn't wait for the more hesitant partner to catch up. In our case we were quite surprised and what our fantasies morphed into when we really dug deep and talked about the truly deviant (by local standards anyway-lol) aspects of our fantasies.
Sorry, I know that's probably not the kind of advice you were hoping for but it's been our observation over a rather lengthy swinging career. Another thought, if you're bound and determined to make your first swinging experience a MFM, is to find a guy who is okay with just watching you two play or maybe getting involved in some soft swinging...i.e. back rubs and or touching but no intercourse. We were soft swap for the first year or two of our swinging life and it was great fun and took the pressure off until we were ready to take the next step. Best of luck!
edit- Sorry about what now seems like a long rambling response. In my defense it was pre-coffee. [em]Emo_79[/em] [/quote]
Damnit! Evildoers is right again!
Can\'t seem to get it going. - What to do? - I\'m going to go a little deaper than the responces I have seen so far.
First thing, you said that you have been divorced TWICE. That is not deadly in itself, but some personal examination of why is a good thing. For the most part, swingers are not looking for problems or \"bagage\" just fun social and sexual things with folks.
I guess what I am suggesting is that you need to be straight out in getting your house in order and yes as others have suggested, a well filled out profile and pics are in order.
Some couples like to add a single male, Some couple like to add a single female... but swinging in general is a couples game. Recognize the fact that you are a way over supply of single males that most couples will find you if they have any disire to add a single male.
At this point you really do need to be someone that is desirable to that couple. Do your best and hope for the best. Fill out your profile, post a few pics, ( not just cock shots, everyone knows that you have one) Be nice, be personable, be someone that others would enjoy being with and that includes social things as well.
OK, TJ off the soap box (TJ = the janitor just cleaning up the place)
"Swinger Robots"?? - WtF?, Now, on top of everything else, we have to worry about Robot Swingers? - Robot needs to go ASAP
Discretion, the better part of valor - I love that saying - Being the female half here and in a "open" relationship.....
Your profile photos are bad... I mean in this lifestyle people like what they like and if you dont have enough photos to show what you are like in general.... then pass (at least for us anyway)
I always get more action then my hubby, he has the same issue....how to start up the conversation. Its hard enough for a actual single guy to get laid, let alone a married one without the woman thinking your a freak or cheating.
We go to parties, and then follow up with the ladies there. Thats where he's got the most single guy action from. Even then that conversation can be a hard one to start haha
I have a issue with my hubby not wanting to be "outed" in his professional circle so thats a difficult one. I'm very very very open and honest and that can be difficult for me to hide stuff like this (side note, I would NEVER out someone else, I just have a hard time keeping my own secrets!)
All I can say about that being outed thing. Take a walk in the mall, you'll see a couple hundred people that your more then likely never to see again, even though logically you live in the same area and do some of the same general things.
Loosen up, live a little. If she does see someone at work that she's slept with.. guess what... they've seen her too! All of the swingers I have met are very respectful and wouldnt come up and high five and say "Nice fucking you Sat, when can we do it again?" at a board meeting or something HAHA Just sayin'
Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? - We havent had much luck with playing. But when we do play we tend to like to stay younger. It doesnt really have to deal with age so much as looks. But what do we know we are only 21 (m) and 20 (f)
9/11/21 NCL cruise to Alaska - Any swingers cruising along with us. - when you get back, tell me about it. maybe i should go on the next one. does it work for single guys, or should i just bring a friend and see what happens?
Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - Aquarius - yes that is exactly what I say... "Have more time? I just thought of a new position" :h . We also tend to cuddle after and bask in the glow. Gives us a moment to come up with something new to try. LOL
Where to go, what to do. - Non club activities - For our first activity we are going to try to diversify and do two activities on two different days.
1. An evening of something wicked: A delightful Eye-full
It is a burlesque show at a theater. It is at Fort Douglas Post Theater 245 South Fort Douglas Boulevard (Bldg 636, Salt Lake City, UT
It is from 6:00pm to 9:30pm and costs $10 per person at the door. This should still leave you available to get to the mansion party that same night if you were going to that.
If you want to be easily identifiable to other swingers (this isn't an event is open to any one) please tie a purple ribbon around your wrist. If you don't want to be bothered with that we will have our ribbons on and I will be wearing an obvious feather in my hat until the performance starts and I will put it back on after it is over.
For the second event I'm looking into brunch on Sunday so I will keep you posted on that.
Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=BIGREID8]I want it SOOOOO bad. My husband finally agreed and changed our profile to him being bi comfortable so people know he will do that. I CAN"T wait to have two cocks inside my pussy ;-)[/quote]
I don't think you will have any trouble finding a willing third. I would like to add my name to the growing pool of volunteers.
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