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Slowing Things Down - An argument for taking your time. - That's a lot.... did ya'll cramp up typing this? Whew ! On the topic, we are always friends first... it makes the actual play much better ( in our own humble opinion ) [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]A nice, slow, buildup might be ideal. In the vanilla world, the buildup often begins long before the first date. You meet a co-worker, or a fellow student, or someone who you see at the coffee shop, and there is some immediate attraction, and eventually you connect on a more physical level. If we are hoping to make those sort of connections, within the swinging lifestyle community, then we are going to have to find a way to run into lifestyle people frequently, and casually. If there is no, or limited opportunities to just run into swingers, enough to build relationships like that, then the way we end up meeting is through dating. If you are swiping right and you are vanilla dating, online, if there is shared chemistry and attraction, you will have a second date and so on and so forth. If the chemistry is super hot, even in the vanilla world, people sometimes fuck on the first date. If the sexual intimacy was superb, that might just accelerate the depth of the shared communications, the amount, and the quality of the time together. The way we see it, if there is some super hot chemistry, on a swinging date, if sexual intimacy happens, the same sort of acceleration in the relationship might happen. It might not. If it doesn't and the sex was good, well, good sex beats mowing the lawn. For us, we raised five kids, who all grew up to be happy, healthy successful adults. All but one of our kids have significant others. Some have kids, which makes us grandparents. Our kids and our grandkids, really like us, love us, and we really like and love them, so we spend a lot of time together. We have friends from work and friends from the neighborhood, and we have jobs. Seriously, dating, at the level we dated, when we were wooing each other, in terms of time, well we just don't have it. If non-monogamy was the openly celebrated norm, and friends openly fucked each other, as a normal part of a friendship, then we would all just naturally end up in those sorts of relationships. Well, except the assholes. Assholes don't flow into meaningful relationships. They take advantage of people's vulnerabilities and loneliness. Manipulation isn't friendship. Demanding people, who wish to break you into the vision of their expectations don't want to be your friend. No give, just take. You'll never be able to give them enough. You owe them nothing, and yet, they will shame you for not giving them exactly what they want when they want it. If we can all just avoid the assholes, then what we do get to share with good caring people, is a privilege and for lack of a better term, a blessing. Good people, reaching out, accept and defend each other's vulnerabilities, even if that means some disappointment and patience, and that takes an honest caring person. Sexual desire honestly expressed is surrounded with vulnerability, and romance even more. I changed subjects there for a moment. Since what swingers do is considered taboo, as a social norm, then that leaves dating. Let's face it. Dating is hit and miss, when it comes to making a lasting connection. When four people are involved dating becomes maybe a bit more complicated. We are not apposed to the slow burn buildup. If we meet someone and there is a spark, that is the motivation. If there really is a nice shared spark, and they want to jump ahead and build the fire, we probably won't say no. [/quote]

You know you are in the Lifestyle when.... - - haha. Good shit. If you haven't watched it, look up "Shit Swingers Say" on YouTube. Funny stuff.

Cards against humanity - Group to play - Love this game. We can pull it up in the chatroom too and play it over the net. We should make a swingers custom deck and play with it.

Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - We were in a poly relationship for over 7 years and was the greatest experience we have ever had. Unfortuately the male of the couple passed away a couple of years ago. We had a great relationship we went everywhere together and done everything together. We was actually very much in love with them and they with us. It is hard to find the right couple that you can get that close with but is possible. So now we are looking again. But the part of the ploy relationship was that we still love one another very much also.

On Premise Swingers Club - SLC - I am sure that there are a lot of folks that would support your venture. However you would have your work cut out for you and I hope you have a good law firm working for you and are able to do it. I know that in some places in the USA there are clubs that are held in a large private residence and that is the only way they can exist in those cities. But police have a tendency to treat the whole thing like it is organized crime. I know that we have members of the community that are cops and ex-cops and they should contact you privately and thus may be of some help or guidance. I do know of one case in Utah where all cars parked by the business were photographed by the cops and folks harassed and thus shut down and another where they simply ran the proprietor of a liberal magazine out of business. I wish you luck.

What really defines a TRUE swinger? - - We never have viewed single males as swingers. To to us and most of our swinging couple friends single males are cheap sex toys you carefully pick from, use them on rare occasions and then return them and forget them. Sounds harsh but the great thing is that is exactly what the majority of single males that we have all met like. We have only met a couple single males out of hundreds that have broken the mold and surprised us.

Can bieng Mormon (LDS) and a Swinger co-exist? - - We are aware of many swingers here in Utah that still attend LDS church services regularly, including one woman that is a primary teacher. There are also many people that send their kids to church, either with neighbors or with other family members. Their attendance at church certainly doesn't inhibit their ability to be effective swingers, so we have no problem with this- we just figure that if they can reconcile it between themselves, then we're good with it.

Xmas carols for swingers. - - Aw c'mon all you Grinches. Not even a "Santa Clause is cummin'"? If you aren't good Swinger Clause will leave a used condom in your stockings!

Question - do you talk about other swingers? - Yes and no. We don't say we play with John and Jane Doe every week. We might say we know of Jane and John if it comes up in conversation.

Hottest State - Who has the hottest people? - Uh, hmmmm, perhaps you missed the subject area, swing humor not swinger functional analytics. Come on, down throw cold water on my fun.... Which State has the Hottest Swingers?