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Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Posted By: TPAFUNLUVNCPL2 Reply posted on:
Jan 8, 2008 - 6:10 am
I would like to point out one thing, when you are a single male you and you are straight and you want a couple then you bring nothing to table. You have nothing to offer the husband of the couple aside from a show but you are asking the man of the couple to share his wife with you with nothing more then a thank you in exchange,
in most cases single men have a gf or wife but simply do not want to risk sharing them because they are afraid of losing them, having them leave or know thats what you want to start doing or will be trying to do or they do not want to take the effort and risk and time to get their partner involved.
Maybe that is it. They are seen as takers but not givers. Also the acts of some of their kind is seen as rude and pushy. Say "No Single Males" in the profile but yet they cannot understand that. Maybe that is why they are all lumped into a bad group. No positives, for most people and a few negatives and you have a bad listing.
I don't think so. People have talked about the "risk" factor time and time again. However, what is to say that the partner won't run even if you don't "risk" them?
Help With Wife - Wife has fantasies but is super hesitant to experiment. - [quote=EVILDOERS]Personally I think you might be a little too eager (can't blame you, we all were when we started) and pushing just a little too hard to make her fantasy a reality. Rather than trying to find a way to get around the "Catch 22" of her fantasy maybe just explore it more verbally and see if it evolves into some kind of scenario that she is comfortable with that more easily can happen in the real world.
The most successful swingers we know, ourselves included, arrived at where they are by being open and supportive of each other's fantasies and desires without forcing them in any way. In other words, be patient, explore your fantasies verbally and maybe role play, a LOT, with each other before you jump into anything that either of you isn't quite ready for.
You might be surprised as you fantasize openly and honestly how your fantasies might evolve and become something that you eventually can and will make a reality. You know your wife better than anyone and maybe she does need a little nudge but most of the swingers we've known over the years who've crashed and burned did so because one partner pushed the limits too fast and didn't wait for the more hesitant partner to catch up. In our case we were quite surprised and what our fantasies morphed into when we really dug deep and talked about the truly deviant (by local standards anyway-lol) aspects of our fantasies.
Sorry, I know that's probably not the kind of advice you were hoping for but it's been our observation over a rather lengthy swinging career. Another thought, if you're bound and determined to make your first swinging experience a MFM, is to find a guy who is okay with just watching you two play or maybe getting involved in some soft swinging...i.e. back rubs and or touching but no intercourse. We were soft swap for the first year or two of our swinging life and it was great fun and took the pressure off until we were ready to take the next step. Best of luck!
edit- Sorry about what now seems like a long rambling response. In my defense it was pre-coffee. [em]Emo_79[/em] [/quote]
Damnit! Evildoers is right again!
9/11/21 NCL cruise to Alaska - Any swingers cruising along with us. - The wife and I are on the Carnival Mardi Gras Oct 30th.. Anyone going with us?
Swinging clubs/locations - - We live near Elixir and have been there a few times. We’ve never noticed any swingers, but our swinger radar skills are pretty weak. It’s a bit small, but would be a cool place to hang out.
Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - [quote=SHREDLITTLERED]May I recommend a wonderful book? The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures. Written by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy. I found this book very positive, helpful and informative. A wonderful guide to that "evolution" you are referring to. Best of luck![/quote]
Thank you so much, I will check it out. :)
Real Swingers Nasty Play Party Saturday the 14th - Cum meet couples that like to play in Draper - If the hubby hadn't broken his foot this morning we would Have been there. Sorry hopefully next time..:v
On Premise Swingers Club - SLC - we were members of the previous club and if another one opened here we would be members there
Las Vegas Swingers club - - We're planning on Vegas tonight and would love suggestions on which swingers club to go to. Never been to one.
Anyone else in or near Daybreak? - We know you are out there! - [quote=PLAYNW3]What ever came of the Daybreak swingers Facebook page? Is it active and being used?[/quote]
pretty slow. a couple people talk and post pics. most people just lurk. We need more people. Could be a great group
Lifestyle after Death - What would you do? - If there were "TRUE" friends you damn right they would accept you if god forbid something happened to your wife/husband. We have a friend his wife died after having gastric bypass surgery. We all went to the funeral talk about solidarty but it was there for him,her family and their children. They were very strongly in the lifestyle and he is totally accepted by all us even if we don't chose to take a single man into our bedroom he was our friend when Christine was alive and he still is. We all get together about once a month have dinner go to a club just generally enjoy the company,and when I say we I speak about 2/3 of a yahoo group. I have come to find that friends within the lifestyle stick by you no matter what more so then friends who have known you long term. I believe its something about common ground we all share and the support network with the swingers lifestyle. Just my 2 cents *smile*
Becky and Jimmy
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