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Are we really as judgmental as vanilla people? - - [i][b]In answer to the OP, YES. Swingers are just as judgemental if not more so than the vanilla people that we live with. The Lifestyle is just a smaller version of the regular world. And because there are less people in it, it may actually seem like the predjudices are more pronounced. All you can really do, is the same thing that you'd do in regular society...try to avoid the assholes. Cinnamon[/b][/i]

Single Males - - [quote=EVILDOERS] ...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote] Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopter”. Call me old-fashioned. [quote=EVILDOERS] I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote] Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait. I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to. [quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote] This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging. [quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote] If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did” chestnut.

Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - I must not understand - I don't understand the problem - you are a 4-some and all happy about it - what is the question?

michigan ?. can anyone help us out. - - were looking for a swingers bar, club, hangout. so we can meet new people in the lifestyle to hang out with and make some friends. so if you can please let us know. thank you watcher

We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - Again, the intent of this post wasn't to obsess over this one bad time. It was to express our feelings and frustration. The advice everyone has shared with us is very helpful. We just want to avoid this kind of situation in the future. Realistically we do realize that we will come across this sort of thing again but atleast now we will be better prepared to deal with it. We will do things differently next time. Hopefully any simiular couples reading this will also choose not to contact us and the ones that are on our level will.

Vegas: Swingers circle or couples oasis? - Which do I prefer - Vegas baby Vegas

swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - I see both sides so.. When do you think the troops will come home? Anybody wanna fuck? I think we need to finish what we start over there though.Anybody wanna fuck? Man these gas prices are getting bad again...maybe 5 bucks a gallon by summer.Anybody wanna fuck? Heard Tom and katie are in Marriage Counseling.Too bad huh? Anybody wanna fuck? Heard Brad and Angalina are going to adopt YET another kid.... Anybody wanna fuck? There now cant we all just get along? ................. OH, Anybody wanna fuck?

ha just horny...How bout you? - yep horny still haha - i think we are all always horny maybe that is why we are swingers. plus i love loads on my boobs

swingin - thought this site was a swingers site -

swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - LOL virgin cpl....what's wrong? you have a guilty concience about something? I don't recall mentioning your name in any post but if the shoe fits, please feel free to wear it. And what was it you spent 9 years doing? Your profile says that you've only been here since feb. Your math is about as bad as Dons......putting people in a minority.....Hasve you two looked at how many members there are here, and how many people like you and Don post the way you do just to start shit? Do the math.... NOW who's the minority? And Don is right. He didn't start this thread, but he sure turned it into another one of his court holding sessions. As far as me being some kind of forum cop.... I couldn't care less. I know how to avoid threads if I choose to, And if you do a little research you'll see that i seldom post here at all. Mainly when Don shows what a jerk he really is, and now it seems that your following in his footsteps. Goos luck with that.