Boerne Swingers in Texas

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Age differences - How do you handle it - We look to make some sort of a friendship with anyone we play with so we feel the best chance that would happen is if they were close to our ages but we have found many exceptions to that theory. We are just playing the odds that a connection is most commonly found with someone of similar ages. The reason for this thread was because of conversation we were involved in at a party recently that we attended. People of all ages were there. I was sitting with a few older ladies, who I must say were very attractive, but then they started talking about all of their ailments and it almost makes me afraid that I might accidently hurt them if we played. I want to provide pleasure, not pain. Also a few were saying they went to a big party and it was mostly younger couples who were dirty dancing and flirting but not really playing and they felt the younger swingers are not as sexual as the older people are. One rationalized it by saying that maybe the fear of pregnancy is the issue. We try to be ourselves at all times and if we find common interests with a couple younger or older then us, great. Since we are somewhere in the middle we can go higher or lower then our ages. We would go higher then our ages first because of the experience and maturity factors hoping their experience will provide us some fun and share their knowledge with us. We wonder what those at either end of the spectrum think and what is their biggest concerns. Great input so far from everyone so thank you for that. Joe and Lori

Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - Just what the hell is a life coach? Is that the new name people, without the proper education, training, and licensure, who counsel others are calling themselves today? I am a professional counselor, licensed and trained to do what I do. My Lady and I met on line at a swingers site and met over coffee at a local public pub. We ended back at her place for a great evening of sex....after an even better afternoon of intelligent conversation. That was two years ago and we have been together ever since. She has moved in with me, carries her own weight in all ways helping run "our" home. We swing, or would not be on this sight....lol, together and seperately. We are deeply in love and have decided to get married, because we do love, respect, cherish, honor and trust each other. Distrust and worry has nothing to do with playing with others, if you trust your partner, have done your own self examination and healed your own life wounds. Our sex life is absolutely GREAT!!!! Our swinging with other people is fun and an enhancement to our love making. I love to see the smile on her face, the spring in her step, and the gleem in her eye after she has been with one of her lovers...male or female. She loves to hear whether or not I had a good time and enjoyed myself with another lover. We may play seperately at times, but I know she is coming home to me...that is where her heart is! And I will always come home to her because that is where my heart and soul are! My professional discipline teaches to respect others and work with the client where they are. I am not to judge them or impose my values on them. When seeking guidance or help from a helping professional...and I mean licensed, trained professonal....do not ask their advise, nor follow their moral code. Each of us is a unique individual with different moral values, belief systems, and desires. As long as we are not harming another being or ourselves, then all is fair, fun, and healthy. Anything may be overindulged in...therefore, moderation is the key. If I drink too much I may be an alcoholic which is a problem, if I drink heavily I may just be a heavy drinker...the key is whether or not what I am doing harms others, my self or results in problems in my life or the life of people I love. You are correct in questioning whether or not swinging is for you, and if it results in any discomfort for either of you, talk openly and non-judgementally with each other. Love, as the saying goes, means never having to say your sorry. But love is open, trusting, non-threating, non-controlling, and is open to the opinions of each other. Because I deeply and honestly love my Lady and she me....her happiness and pleasure is more important than any thing to me. As one individual stated this will be my third marriage too. She completes me like no other person can. Best of hard work to get where you are comfortable looking at your mate and your self in the mirror....it well worth it what ever you decide.

A paradigm shift - polyamory - Your thoughts? Here are mine... - Hitting the topic of Poly.... I am poly my wife is not. We swing. I have a lady friend, spice if you will who is also married and her husband is not poly and they do not swing. We, all 4 of us are fast friends and both my wife and her husband have no problem with her's and my arrangement. THey also know that We swing. Now how did that person come into our life.. we met and became friends almost immediatly. I fell in love with her but am sill "IN love with my wife as well. I< we, like to become friends with people before we jump into the sack with them... BTW they both know that we swing. Could I fall in love with another woman, definitely.. Could I fall for a woman who we might swing with....I could and have. No biggy...If she is not into that I understand... Not everyone can handle the situation Some one mentioned that jealousy are natural.... Only in the sense that by example we are programmed to them, just as we are not "taught " not to eat other people but we kind of get that impression...Canibalism(sp) is not acceptable any more than is marrying ones own sister or brother. Possessiveness is about owning somthing that is not yours to own. No one owns anyone else and especially not their spouse. Is it natural to own a person? I say no. Somehow when people get into a relationship the idea creeps in that says that the other person is your exclusive property. One need to put that aside if one is a swinger. As for jealousy.... Jealousy is a combination of both possessiveness and ones own insadequacies. Maybe one could describe that as fear.. Fear that she or he will meet someone better. Fear that we are not good enough, etc etc etc. So Jealousy is a reaction to these fears and the possessiveness not a true emotion at all. Everyone thinks of Jealousy as an emotion, which it is not. So polyamory is very possibly with swinging but may purists of poly will say that poly and swinging are difinitely two different things... Maybe but they can exist simultaneously. Just a note; More than 60% and I've seen figures up to 77% of all married couples, and I'm sure that it extends to LTR's as well...maybe even swingers, are at some time in their life engaged in serial monogamy..; i.e., either cheating or getting ready for the split-up. Isn't this a simpler form of or something like poly? ... THink about that....

Party every sat night - - ENTRE NOUS In Washington DC every saturday night there is a nice club that opens for swingers. ABC laws do apply, but it is a great way to meet other couples in the area. You don't have to join the website, just look it over for info about the club. http://www.entrenousqueen.com/AdultWarning.html

female AGE turn on-off - - Yes indeed , i know the females disagree with the concept of cheating and dislike my advice , my reply was intended to the men on this site , you will not find a marriage consular nor a family therapist that will not advice the way i did , in a private practice you would pay $ 250 per hr. for 2 hour the minimum for this advice ,my dear swingers ,you got it for free ! enjoy fucking and cheating;)

WHERE'S THE FUN IN PARADISE - Where are all the fun swingers in Hawaii - I've been back in Honolulu now for almost a month, and hardly see any forum postings about parties or get togethers here in paradise. What gives people? Isn't Hawaii supposed to be paradise? Fun in the tropical sun? If there are any parties or get togethers I sure would like to know. I'm respectable and very respectfull of others. I know the proper etiquet in a party situation. Just hoping that people who are swingers that might travel here know where to go for fun.

How to identify yourself as a Swinger - - [quote=EVILDOERS]LOL, yeah this subject...or fantasy (and the black ring, or the ankle bracelet, or the...(insert urban legend here)) crops up every few months or so. Bottom line, no matter how hard people want to find a way to ID other swingers in public it won't happen. Let's say for a minute that all or even just most swingers DID agree somehow on some kind of article to wear or display. It would take about 24 hours (likely less) for someone to post it online and it would be pretty much common knowledge within a week. Ergo nobody would actually display it for fear of being outed. Sorry, just human nature on all counts. We identify other swingers the old fashioned way. Sheer irrational speculation. Either that of we consult the Psychic Network. Both ways work equally well. [em]Emo_67[/em] [/quote] Ah yes, i see you point there. Makes perfect sense. Sorry if this was brought up before, cant seem to find a way to search the forums? Is there a way?

Frustration with Friend Requests - - [quote=EVILDOERS]The underlying problem is the "we're swingers, you're swingers" mindset. We've been around the scene for a long time and met many many people who don't understand why we won't just fuck them...afterall, they're swingers and we're swingers...so let's just fuck already. This "hobby" is for fantasy fulfillment. If you aren't at least a little bit attracted to someone for any reason then what the hell is the point of fucking them? Especially when most of us can stay home and have WAY better sex with someone we love. [/quote] Exactly!!! Couldn't put it better myself!!

Pineapple Stickers - pineapple sticker = swingers? - Interesting. I have not heard of this, but this is definitely going to have me on the lookout. 😁

Ways to point out Swingers in public - - We’ve also heard the black ring on right hand thing (no middle finger, that signifies asexuality). Mine is a black version of The One Ring from LOTR but I’m a geek.