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We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - we ike to know the cpl a little b4 fucking... but the extent is like what music do you listen to... do u play chess...what r ur hobbies...etc... dont care that your mothers brothers, cousins brothers sister is a slut... tmi... but knowing the cpl and some of their interests is food for thought for activitys outside the bedroom.....but the b4 mentioned drama is what we try to avoid.....just our 2cents worth...dennis and sara
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - One thing we have that works pretty well is, certain phrases or a look that if one of us isn't too excited about proceeding further or theres something wrong, all we need to do is say it and then your spouse knows and things slow down. This is mostly addressed to the other couple as it seems as though they wasnt on the same page.
Serious questions from a newbie.. - - I read that the lack of drug use creates intelligent individuals to leave incredibly lengthy posts about the subject of drugs and their effect on Swingers and the general population!
Let's start a thread about secrets and techniques that increase the frequency and intensity of the male and female orgasm! Now that would be worthy of 4 pages and hundreds of paragraphs... LOL.
I'm just joking with you guys.. Compelling information and well thought out responses. Enjoy what's left of your weekend..
UtHot
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - We never use names just describe situations to illustrate what type of things we do. The only time I could imagine using names is if you went to house party and all concerned know you were all there. Then would use general terms of what mutual experiences we had at the party but no specifics we may have done with the people on a one on one basis. Discretion is paramount.
Required info for swingers - - LOL LLLLLOL
Sturgis 2009 - - OK the knuckle saloon in sturgis, august 3rd at 7pm; so how do we know the swingers from the regular sturgis crowd?
How has swinging made your marriage better? - - Curious... how many of the previous posters (or anyone on here for that matter) are on their FIRST marriage and have been "successful" swingers for 4-5 years+ ?
Tally those numbers and see if it makes marriages better. Would also be curious about second, third, fourth marriages (but those are harder because a lot have met in the lifestyle and/or came from a marriage that ended in infidelity). Still, have wondered.
P.S. EVILDOERS Mrs cntrl has been told that a couple of times as well.
HELP!!! - Need help settling a disagreement between me and the hubby. - I would again say, "That depends." We rarely hook up at parties either but it's because at this point in our swinging career we no longer feel the need/desire to fuck just to say we fucked. We're not prudes by any means but our curiosity has been more than satisfied over the years and we now only hook up with people we find a really good connection with. And we're no longer upset or disappointed when we go out and DON'T hook up, although we have been at times in the past and know quite a few couples who really feel like they've wasted their time (and maybe a good babysitter) when they don't hook up. It very much depends on who we meet at a party, how well we connect, our general mood and other intangibles. We've found that there are generally two types of swingers; those who really just want to forego all the bullshit and fuck and those who want to get to know people a little bit first (even if just briefly) before they decide if they want to fuck them. Which type you are will likely determine how often you hook up. But you know what? There isn't just one way to swing.
Are we really as judgmental as vanilla people? - - [quote=THOUGHTGARDEN]Are some people perhaps confusing "judgemental" with "selective"?[/quote]
Right - some people seem to think that because we are swingers we have sex with anyone and therefore they view a rejection as a personal snub. I think they forget that "just not that into you" applies as much in swinging as vanilla relationships.
Bitchfest here...... - - Having been in this lifestyle for quite some time, I've seen more than my share of drama. I think the most common misconception is that everyone is on the same mindset.
This is not the case for most. You would think that going to a meet and greet set up on a Swinger's site would be a license to "Act" like swingers to anyone you recognize from the site in a public setting. However, I've learned quickly that because everyone responds differently, it is best to assume nothing and take nothing for granted and put on your thickest skin and expect drama. If nothing happens, and you make a connection with some one or both, then build from there and have fun. I have more fun when I go with no expectations and have them wildly exceeded, than to go full on and have the evening ruined through taking drama filled responses personal.
However, I don't think that because some people may have jealousies, that they have the right to treat people rudely. I think there are many who can work on this a bit more and realize that we are all in this to have some fun.
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