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Respect...Needed? or just forgotten. - - The various points that have been made are well taken.
We have been approached by people who are rude or crass. Typically it is a single male, often married pretending to be single or the de facto single male -- half of a vanilla couple pretending to be a swinging couple.
I have several observations:
This single male is far more likely to be a trial member.
They have little or no real knowledge of swinging and it shows.
They don\'t expect to be invited to join the couple or single female they approach.
They simply find a cheap thrill in the crass sexaulity of the rude note they send.
(I suspect they type them with one hand.)
If given the oportunity (which their approach itself precludes) they would not play.
Don\'t confuse them with the polite & respectful single males that are a part of swinging.
We jokingly refer to them as hard-ons. They think because they once had a hard on -- they are qualified to swing. My FAVORITES are the ones that will \"let you watch\" or \"don\'t mind if you joins in\" as if somehow by their offer alone -- Belinda becomes theirs.
You will see them at the clubs. Somehow they come up with the courage to go to a swingers club that allows single males. They are the males that hide in a corner too afraid to approach anyone or they are the males that come into the room with attitude written all over them -- as if saying \"I paid my fees -- who do I get to fuck\".
If he is found out, the male half of the vanilla couple will stamp and stammer and claim that either he has his wife\'s permission or that she is cold and he is not getting any at home. Given their approach to sex. I have figured out, at least in part, why they are not getting any at home.
I was raised by a very southern, very polite, Daughters of the Confederacy -- mother. Thus I had to endure the suffering born of numerous catillions or formal dances. Everyone knew everyone at the dances. Everyone knew that everyone was there to dance. But you went through the rituals of an introduction and small talk -- prior to dancing. While this analogy ignores the aspects of friendship that are a part of swinging. I have found that the manners I learned at my mothers knee have served me well in swinging. (Don\'t ya know that would shock the hell out of her!)
Why did you join Swingular? - Wondering what brings people here - Someone turned us on to the site, and we are trying to make new friends in the Tampa area. Lots of swingers here in Florida, and we look forward to meeting you.
R & C
Polyamory - Any thoughts on an exclusive 3 or more partner relationship? - One thing to help is swinging is not poly and poly is not swinging. They are two distinct differences. Swinging is about the physical aspect - sex (and friendship of course), while poly is about love (poly - many, amory - love -- many love).
Many people who live in a triad or a poly relationship started off as swingers, but due to the emotional conflict between many "typical" swingers, chose to go into a more poly lifestyle.
Ok, here is a lot of information here:
http://www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com/index.html
Just a little of what I know on the subject. Is it possible, yes, but there has to be a clear understanding, a very strong love and a willingness from all involved to address any issue that arise.
The same could be said for an open relationship; works for some, not for everyone.
Hottest State - Who has the hottest people? - /***************************************************************************
Well I remember a forum thread on here where Florida was saying how hot all the Utah folks were. So sounds like to me Florida threw in the towel before they even tried.
Ken
****************************************************************************/
I believe that thread was specific about UT Swingers on this site
Now that you're one of them there fancy swingers... - - [quote=EVILDOERS]It's very nice of you to bring ice cream to an event, FRIENDLY. There is always room for extra ice cream or maybe a casserole or a bundt cake.[/quote]
I dunno, once they start to bring ice cream, I become a bit of a dessert snob. I want white chocolate raspberry truffle cheesecake next time.
Wishbones - - Hi.
Thanks for the advice where to buy them. But about wearing a swingers identification... We presume you don't wear them on a birthday party with the family. But its a good idea to show you are swingers on vacation, public party's or elsewhere. These are the places to meet like minded people and how can you otherwise find them. If they like you, they will get in contact and if others recognise you as swinger without being a swinger themself, who cares!
A swingers hug from The Netherlands
Bea and Alex
fort myers on premise club - - Check out the Ft Myers Swingers group here on Swingular. I think you'll find what your looking for..
Vanilla "life" just doesn't taste as good! - What else doesn't "taste" as good? - The dirty little secret of the lifestyle (Okay, there are a LOT of dirty little secrets! LOL) is that it's VERY hard to go back to Vanillalandia and not become bored to death. We've known SO many swingers who "quit" the lifestyle and no longer want to have recreational sex with others but nonetheless still try to hang out with swingers and go to swing parties and such. *shrug*
[img]https://media1.tenor.com/images/856456b4fac99f838d6946c988a34f7b/tenor.gif?itemid=8607839[/img]
Black Ring - Who has theirs and how have they caught on? - A black ring worn on the middle finger of their right hand is a common symbol of the asexual community. The material and exact design of the ring are not important as long as it is primarily black. The black ring is often associated with people who identify as swingers. However parts of the swinger community have taken care to inform people to not wear the black ring on the right hand, middle finger out of respect of the Asexual community. Plain black rings also coincide with the symbol ? which symbolized asexuality and genderless. This symbol is also often written in black, simple because it's a common ink color.
Your right middle means "currently single", the right ring means "currently taken" and since the left ring means "taken/married" in a permanent sense, then the next logical conclusion would be that left middle means "permanently single".
Now if you want to be really confuesd try and find a definition for Asexual LOL
Looking for advice - Single male looking for advice about the community - If I were you I would leave this site. Go out & find a gal & then come back when you have something to equally trade. Or perhaps find a SINGLE swingers site.
We have been to parties & the single guys flying around looking to jump on anything that will let them is just weird.
Single males in this environment are like Misquotes.
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