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Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - It seems the bad experiences with a few select single males has lead to such "hatred" in the lifestyle. We don't have an interest in playing with single males but we can say that for the most part they have been very respectful upon our reply. Hopefully as time passes the single male will continue to get a better name and those that are disrespectful will be in the minority.
R&S
We thought this was educational and should explain a lot about s - keep an open mind. Swingers are spiders. Each to their own unique ways! - Funny...yep! LOL
That little nudge many of us need - - [quote=PARTYINLV]We think honesty is the best way to be. If she found out about the meeting without her knowledge, your tryst into the lifestyle may be over. Plus, she might feel the pressure to play at some point anyway. Also, she will always wonder if the next meeting is arranged without her knowledge.
Evildoers is correct in meeting with zero chance of playtime. Take their advice. She will feel more relaxed and could enjoy herself with the pressure off. We will take it a step further:
Step 1: Set up a date with ZERO playtime opportunity and let the other couple know that. Do something fun (a hike, Topgolf, etc) and get to know them. At the conclusion of the date, let them know that if they do not receive a message from YOU within 24 hours, you don't feel you are a match.
Step 2: If you send a message to meet again, let them know your intent and your boundaries. For example, (kissing ok), (fondling ok), (bi kissing ok), (same room, separate room, either room ok), (nudity ok or not). But, speak honestly with each other about this. It's not nice to lead people on after you have committed. At the conclusion of the date, let them know that if they do not receive a message from YOU within 24 hours, you are not ready to go further.
Step 3: If you send a message to meet again, let them know what is acceptable. For example (full swap or soft swap), (same room, separate rooms or either ok), (kissing or no kissing), (bi play) etc. Again, you will have to be honest with yourselves if you can do this. By a third date, the other couple has invested a lot of time in you. So, be nice and don't lead them on. Enjoy the playtime. Save enough time for the afterglow sex with them relaxing, chatting, and laughing.
By this point, you may have found a couple that you can see multiple times. Doing vanilla activities with them might be a bonus. They may even introduce you to their lifestyle friends too.
The other option is attending a house party where play is not expected. You will be able to speak to several couple and perhaps, use the process above. Or you can play that night.
When we entered the lifestyle, we never had that couple who could mentor us. After we considered ourselves as no longer newbies, we became the newbie "whisperers" to offer what we never had. However, we've gotten away from newbies since our circle is with experienced swingers now. But with covid, we would date newbies again.[/quote]
Sounds like an excellent plan to avoid those one and done awkward meet ups👍
Long Weekend - Just wondering what people have planned - [quote=SIMPLEPLEASURES]anyone ever go to Fantasy Swingers Club in vegas. also the the exchange ever get set up there. [/quote]
If you hear anything good or bad please let us know. We plan on attending the last week in July.
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - Never mention names! One thing we've found over the years is that people who swing, particularly those who belong to clubs, have too much to say about other people. I don't want to hear about it.. The people who are typically being trashed may be friends and we may have had different experiences with them. Best thing is simply the illustrated comments about what your version of swinging is. Descretion means or should mean what happens with others stays there and is not discussed. People may mesh differently with others and your experience or theirs is irrelevant. So MUM's the word.
Ray
Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - [quote=T0RQUE][quote=MORKANDMINDY]I think the fact that the site hasn't offered lifetime membership specials for so long has really impacted people's ability to connect with newer couples. [/quote]
Contrare, Mr. Mork. Last month, our lifetime membership was $35.
just sayin...
[/quote]
what you got your lifetime membership for $35...shit they charged me $35.50, and what happened to the endless supply of former Victoria secret models living in the salt lake valley that they promised at my every whim? What ever happened to the good old days when a handshake was a promise...not a way to ejaculate.
Desire Cancun Trip - July 15-24 - Anyone planning on going to Mexico in September or October? Any info on good rates or where to look for cruises or vacations for swingers? We are looking to go in September or October...would love info and company! :) Thanks in advance for any info!
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - 2010 F150 Lariat, 2012 Jeep Wrangler Rubicon Unlimited, 2012 Street Glide, and 2007 Heritage, All broke in except for Jeep
So are you the gal who folks suspect? or the last person they c - Wish we could do polls on here??? - Both my parents know, and they are on the site. But we keep our sexual encounters to ourselves. My parents probably expected me to be the "bad" girl, my sister on the other hand is totaly different and don't agree with the lifestyle. But we have been honest with our friends and have told them we are Swingers.
Swinging with Vanillas - Any success stories? - [quote=EVILDOERS]I know this probably won't be a very popular point of view but I kind of have a problem with vanilla hunting. If you meet some vanillas and talk to them, hell tell them you are swingers or whatever, and they're interested and then you leave it there and they have time to go home and consider what you've told them and make a sober rational decision then great. Where the line becomes blurred to me is approaching vanillas in say a bar situation where there is plenty of alcohol or whatever and then sort of guiding (pushing?) them into a situation where they might not be thinking completely rationally. I think the majority of us probably approached swinging from the perspective of making a conscious decision to try it out or whatever before we were put in a situation where sexual play might happen. I just think it's only fair for others to have that same consideration "space" if you will before they jump into something they might not be ready to handle. Swinging is great. We have and awesome little hobby that is DEFINITELY not for everyone no matter how much we think it should be. The truth is very few people can actually handle the intense dynamics of swapping spouses. JMO[/quote]
Had the same uncomfortable thought when I read this post
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