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What would you do? - what does a person do when their spouse no longer wishes to paticipate - Well.
How amazing that the "couple in question" just happens to be in my home town. And my wife and I are at a serious impasse about the same subject, but in the "traditional direction" i.e. I still want it. She still doesn't.
I'm... very surprised that a bunch of Swingers are so unanimous that "No trumps yes": that swinging is just something you do - but are ashamed of enough that any "no" in the group instantly defines the partner's life as well. Why isn't "yes" just as valid?
In our case, we've been married for over 25 years. We've had a very-good run. Our children are grown and gone. We're financially comfortable. And we're still physically capable - as we watch our parents be physically unable to walk, hear, see, pee, or do much of anything to enjoy *anything* - the point there being that I hear the clock ticking and to me, this is THE time of life to reap one's reward for the life one has lead - before it's too late to do anything but try to keep breathing.
And for me, being honest, the ONE thing that is my reward - is erotic fun. Let me be clear that what I crave is *erotic fun* - not just madly try to find someone new to fuck and never see again - but partners who want to wallow in the erotic experience of "Truth or Dare" and Lifestyle conventions and teasing and games. That's IT for me. That's why "doing it" is called "doing IT". And I've been a great husband/father/responsible citizen for over 50 years. And I feel that there isn't anything else in my life that really gives me a "reason for living".
And my wife, bless her, just has never had any passion. She enjoys it when I have sex with her. When I give her a nice massage followed by 3 or 4 orgasms. But she's happy with twice a month or less. And she had no need at all for my "erotic experiences". So here we are. And over the last 10 years we've tried pretty-much every possibility: traditional fidelity, me cheating, us swinging, me swinging alone with her permission... and it always ultimately winds up that the only way she is not *miserable* is if I'm following "traditional fidelity". And the only way I'm not miserable - is if I have the freedom to pursue erotic associations.
Now. If my passion were bowling, there wouldn't be a problem. If her passion were gardening or shoe shopping, there wouldn't be a problem. Everybody would just tell us to do our thing without the other - and enjoy what we *do* enjoy together. But somehow sex is THE one that we have to do *together* or not at all.
So we're very very seriously trying to figure out if we'd both be happier by tearing up a marriage and going our separate ways.
We can all *say* that whoever does NOT want to swing - rules the day, but imagine whatever your very-favorite thing is to do. Then imagine your spouse telling you: "I don't like to do that, so WE won't ever do that and You won't do it without me - and you won't do it alone, either - ever again". Now what?
Swingers House Party in Jerome, Id - Free Swingers House Party - The date is final October 23rd 2010 Jerome, Id. If you are interested in cumming please RSVP to us at [email protected] and we will get to know you and get you all the info. Invite all your lifestyle friends. This is our second house party and being halloween feel free to drees up but costume is not required if that just isnt your thing. Couples and single ladies welcome with RSVP, single men must apply first cum first invited.
Favorite bars in utah - - Yes, I read the article. Our experience (getting close to 30 years in the swinging trenches) has shown that the authorities almost invariably use other (easier to prosecute) issues to shut down naughty things like swinging parties. Recently in Texas they're trying to use zoning ordinances and disturbing the peace and, believe it or not, parking ordinances. Quite often it's alcohol related. Not too many years ago with a local, fairly prominent swinger who held frequent parties in his upscale neighborhood they nailed him for providing alcohol to minors (apparently one girl at one of his parties was not yet 21).
And I would ague that Las Vegas is anything but tolerant for swingers parties or really anything related to sex. They love to sell the idea of sex but when the rubber meets the road they are as intolerant as anywhere we've been. I don't remember the last hotel takeover we attended in Vegas where a topless pool wasn't promised and then shut down by the local authorities. Of course the big money hotels have absolutely no problem providing topless pools...if they can charge a hefty premium to do so. Vegas is all sizzle and no steak (in the vernacular of my grandfather).
Swing Clubs in Las Vegas - - We are going to be in Vegas the middle of November for 5 days. Staying at the Hard Rock or Planet Hollywood, haven't decided yet. Are there swing clubs there that you would recommend? Also this is our first time in Vegas, what are the "must do's"? Not the boring stuff you would find on tripadvisor, but the fun stuff that swingers/nudists would do ;)))
Thanks!!
Swingers In Uniform - Pay your memorial day respects here. - Juan probably watched Farenheit 911 and thinks himself and intellectual now. Facts, to this crowd, though interesting, are irrelevant. I believe the only rich white fat man to profit directly from 911 is Micheal Moore.
Per Southpark and Team America:
Go USA. Go Broncos. America, fuck yeah.
seniors - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single ladies? - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single females?
Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - Don't discount the Virgo you never know what tricks she has up her sleeves!;)
Ms. busymidvale= Virgo
Mr. busymidvale= Sagittarius
HELP!!! - Need help settling a disagreement between me and the hubby. - I would again say, "That depends." We rarely hook up at parties either but it's because at this point in our swinging career we no longer feel the need/desire to fuck just to say we fucked. We're not prudes by any means but our curiosity has been more than satisfied over the years and we now only hook up with people we find a really good connection with. And we're no longer upset or disappointed when we go out and DON'T hook up, although we have been at times in the past and know quite a few couples who really feel like they've wasted their time (and maybe a good babysitter) when they don't hook up. It very much depends on who we meet at a party, how well we connect, our general mood and other intangibles. We've found that there are generally two types of swingers; those who really just want to forego all the bullshit and fuck and those who want to get to know people a little bit first (even if just briefly) before they decide if they want to fuck them. Which type you are will likely determine how often you hook up. But you know what? There isn't just one way to swing.
OUCH - Anyone caught swinging bu family or friends? - On a boat a boat, fishing, with my boss and his wife when she starts asking Raychel about our swingers profile her daughter saw on the internet. Aside from all the obvious problems like why is their HS aged daughter cruising swinger profiles; the other daughter lives in boston and would not know us from anywhere; why are they talking to each other about this; and can I swim to shore. So that's pretty odd.
Bob
P.S. We went for the Clintonesque defense of what do you mean by "swinging".
Effinghman - Swingers - Effingham, IL? We used to live in Carbondale!
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