Ray Swingers in North_dakota

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What about the lifestyle didn't meet your expectations? - Preconceptions and disappointment. - I thought it might be interesting to see what preconceived ideas people had about swinging that were completely different than what they actually found in the lifestyle. As an example, this isn't one of OUR preconceptions but we've run into SO many people (yes, usually guys...single AND coupled) who have the idea that basically anyone will fuck anyone in the lifestyle. We've encountered a large number of swingers over the years who seem to believe that the ONLY commonalities necessary for a swinging connection is the simple fact that we're all swingers. Any other factors are, apparently, moot. What things did YOU find in the lifestyle that didn't mesh with what you thought the lifestyle was all about? Did you think it would all be one big wild orgy? Or did you imagine that there were myriad unicorns ready, willing, and able to fuck you at the drop of a hat? [em]Emo_49[/em]

"Can't Say No" Party - Who'd be interested in coming? - Mrs LPA69 and I have been talking about hosting a "Can't Say No" party at our home in Lindon UT. The idea comes from when we were investigating some foreign swingers clubs. There was one in South Africa that advertised a "can't Say No" room. If you went into the room, you could not turn down a request from someone else in the room, unless their request would be a health hazard (eg bareback intercourse). The idea intrigued us both (okay, me more than her, but she likes the idea). If we host such a party, it would be a little different from the South Africa swingers club. We suggest that it work this way. 1. We would have 10 couples maximum come to our house. We would advertise the party to everyone on Swingular, because it would be fun to have some couples we didn't know in attendance, just to make it more exciting. 2. We'd take a little time to drink, snack, and mingle while we were getting to know everyone else a little. During the mingle time, the two in each couple could talk about who they were interested in or not. 3. The women would all get together in private, and discuss amongst themselves who they were each willing to play with, what they were willing to do, etc. 4. Everyone would get back together, and for the next hour or so, each woman would tell her man what to do with whom, and the man could not say no. 5. After a break, the men would all get together in private, and discuss who they were each willing to play with, what they were willing to do, etc. 6. Everyone would get back together, and for the next hour or so, each man would tell his woman what to do with whom, and the woman could not say no. That's all the rules. The party could be as wild as those in attendance wanted to make it. Obviously it would be critical for each couple to state clearly their feelings to their own partner during Step 2, because after that, you can't say no to your own partner's instructions (but you're not obligated to do something that another person asks you to do). You'd have to really trust your own partner, wouldn't you? We'd like to know how many of you couples would be interested in that kind of party. The earliest we could host it would be New Year's Eve (or maybe in January), but we'd like to get an idea now as to the interest level. L&P

Polyamory - Please share your thoughts.... - My wife and I have been poly for almost 4 years now. We've learned that poly is a REALLY broad topic, and there are as many ways to "do" poly as there are grains of sand on the beach. We've met some awesome people. We've met some folks whose relationships resemble train wrecks. It's not right for everyone, but it's a viable option for certain people. My perception is that there isn't always a big difference between poly and swinging. I've met swingers that talk bad about poly but REQUIRE some sort of commonality and friendship before sex, and I've found poly people that badmouth swingers but use "poly" as an excuse to fuck anyone they want to. That's my perception. Can I have sex with someone I don't know but feel attracted to? Yes! Do I prefer intimacy with someone I feel a deeper emotional connection to? Sure! But that's just me and my wants/needs/desires. We're all different.

Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Thanks! That might be a tall order to find a steampunk costume in late January.

Curiouscpl91 - Identifying lifestylers - We've found that the best way to ID other swingers is to walk up and grab them by the crotch. It's a known fact that people who swap spouses have a crotch temperature almost 10 degrees higher than the average person. Your chances of correctly identifying a lifestyler by a black ring on the right hand is about the same as it is identifying a "hotwife" because she's wearing an ankle bracelet. Both are mostly urban legends. Trust me, people have been trying almost since day one to figure out a way to find other swingers out and about in the real world. Some have used the yin and yang symbol, some have used an apple with a bite taken out of it. The cold hard truth is that most swingers really don't want vanillas to know they're swingers and thus, wouldn't wear something that would easily "out" them in public as swingers. Don't you think, in this day of instantaneous communication and social media that if there was any kind of universally recognized symbol for swingers that it wouldn't soon become knowledge in the vanilla world? If you really want others to know you're a swinger just wear a t-shirt that spells it out. (Not trying to harsh your buzz MATTANDLIZ.) [img]http://i3.cpcache.com/product/437336974/swingers_tshirt.jpg?width=350&height=350&Filters=%5B%7B%22name%22%3A%22crop%22%2C%22value%22%3A%7B%22x%22%3A58.3%2C%22y%22%3A0%2C%22w%22%3A233.3%2C%22h%22%3A280.0%7D%2C%22sequence%22%3A1%7D%2C%7B%22name%22%3A%22background%22%2C%22value%22%3A%22F2F2F2%22%2C%22sequence%22%3A2%7D%5D[/img]

Where to go, what to do. - Non club activities - [quote=HELLO_KITTY12984][quote=CRAZYFOXTCU]Is there any chance that a place could exist where swingers could go meet other swingers on a regular basis that isn't a club? We find clubs boring and loud. Half the meet and greets are just lifestyle club scenes. Mansion parties are great but they don't exist all the time and would be too expensive if they did. I doubt the non club scene would be viable though.[/quote] i dunno. but your default profile pic looks almost identical to my brother-in-law's default pic and it scared me for a minute. then i got over it and realize youre super hot. the end. :D[/quote] Thanks Kitty! Last time we spoke didn't you say you were moving to another state for the military or something along those lines?

Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - We have met plenty of people here and had lots of fun, There is a very big cross section of UT here, from the young and fit to the older larger folks like us and every combo in between. If you put forth the effort you will find like minded folks to play with. TJ.

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - Any one doing MOAB in two weeks??

Now that you're one of them there fancy swingers... - - I play as a single male (although sometimes I bring a vanilla swirl along to an event or something) but I've always had good experiences with people I meet up with. I have also had nothing but good experiences at parties, so I guess I'm pretty lucky that way. For me, the lifestyle hasn't exactly turned me into a sex snob or anything like that, but I have gotten used to the open attitudes. It has become much harder (and not in the good way) to play with vanilla females who don't have those same attitudes. Not in the sense of I'm coming on too strong or pushing boundaries harder, but just that "normal" attitudes towards sex and sexual exploration in the LS are different than those in the single scene.

Are you more or less tolerant? - - We are probably the same as before we became swingers.. U have to be atractive, but we have learned douchiness comes in all shapes and sizes