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Are we really as judgmental as vanilla people? - - Yes, many in the lifestyle are as judgmental as those outside. I am 15 pounds overweight but to some I am as broad as a battleship. What's more, after 34 years of marriage, 24 of which were in the lifestyle, my wife died. All of a sudden I was persona non grata at the club we attended because single males were not allowed. I had not changed, only my marital status. I have been pilloried and shunned because of being lumped with the FEW young single guys who don't have a clue. Now I have 3 strikes: I'm old, I'm slightly overweight, and single. I've learned these last 9 years that swingers can be just as cruel, predjudiced and uncaring as other people. What keeps me going is all those swingers who truely accept me as I am.:z
Has swinging changed? - - I've been trying to quantify the changes we're seeing but it's a little hard to pin down. For one thing, there seem to be quite a few people sticking their heads in and quickly retreating. Perhaps it's the ease of entry that allows "lookie Lous" to sort of check things out without really risking actually MEETING someone. LOL Another thing we've noticed is that there seem to be more people treating swinging as simply another way to hook up for NSA sex. I mean I know at it's core that's what swinging is but it's almost become a wham, bam, thank you ma'am culture rather than the sensuality of sharing your body with a caring generous lover. Foreplay almost seems to have become perfunctory (if it happens at all) and there's more of a "down and dirty by nine thirty" attitude than there used to be. It's almost a hit it and quit it or get in, get out, go home culture now. Many people just seem to be in such a hurry to fuck that they don't really want to take any time to get to know each other a little first. Maybe I'm seeing things but it just seems like it's changed a lot since we started swinging. I was talking to some people on another site and one guy postulated that the changes were due to the scene being so diluted by people with varied interests that there just aren't a lot of "pure" swingers anymore. I dunno, maybe I just need more coffee. [em]Emo_96[/em]
hotel party advice - - I've never been to a hotel party for the purpose of meeting swingers/possible swinging. Has any one else been? We've been invited next weekend and I'd like to know what to expect. I'm already discussing it with the Mr since he seems to be a little more forward than I. (ahem) Of what *I* will and won't be doing, just in case.
I hate going to these kinds of things sometimes because it almost always ends up being a waste of time and money. Then on the way home I'm mentally kicking myself for 1, the time I wasted, and 2, the money I wasted.
Unicorn hunt - ISO the ever elusive Unicorn - Don’t limit your search for your unicorn to swingers groups. Just be open and pay attention almost every where. We have had a few incredible memories with our new partner. Some don’t care for the label unicorn. The most bold third, friend, and lover we had the pleasure of spending many years with, worked for us and we thought we kept our business selfs separate from our pleasure selfs. Basically I had to let her go, after a few months. Shortly after firing her she turned to me with what seemed like a sigh of relief and asked. Can I date your wife? She was an amazing partner to add to our relationship! Work she lasted 3 months. Our partner, 6 years! Only moving on to start her own family. Good luck
Swingular's 1st Annual Motorcyle Ride - To benefit a cause of your choice. - [quote=CHECKTHISOUT84101]Some of you know that we are very private about this part of our life and we have a question for those that are planning this very worthy cause/event. Is this event going to be promoted or get attention from the media, police or a bunch of curious on-lookers? We honestly do not mind supporting a worthy cause like this, but showing up for a ride and having the Newspaper or 10pm TV Local News there taking pictures or video of us on our bikes is not something we want to be part of. We have this vision that local news will be starting off the 10pm time slot that day with....."Local Swingers Straddle A Hog To Help Support Breast Cancer". Maybe it's just us, but we would prefer to support this cause quietly and anonymous if this is the case. We are personally very happy to be who we are in private, but we know our family, friends and jobs WILL NOT LIKE WHO WE ARE IN OUR PRIVATE LIVES. Hope someone can answer this question for us. Thank you The Nutterbutter's[/quote]
VERY good point! We would not be real comfortable with this, either...however, we do support a lot of different rides sponsered by a lot of different groups we personally are not part of...so guess we could always pass off any questions in that manner..But, it would be nice if it wasn't really advertised as sposered by a swinger group. You're right, I think the media would jump on it..JUST for that reason!
Would love to hear Administrations view of this?
Funny Joke About Forums - How Many Forum Members Does It Take to Change A Lightbulb? - WOW!!
After reading about BRADD, when swingers go bad, and controlling men I needed that laugh.
Thanks BABES!
KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - I wish we could find their profile on here. We could bombard their inbox with all kinds of naughty emails to really spice up the news show tonight.
Florida swinging - Swinging in Florida - The halloween party was way better then we ever expected so time to chat was at a minumum. The little we did get to chat about this subject seems that most were afraid of all the fakes out there. That explains why we have couples traveling from as far as Plant City to come here. One of our friends took it upon themselves to buy small toys to give to the women at the party so we were going to do one of the chinese gift exchanges where you draw numbers but the action got so hot and heavy so fast that we all forgot about the wrapped toys and I am looking at them as I write this. Other friends are hosting the Christmas Party so we will bring those with us to that party.
I used to think it was that couples here are looking for what you can give them or a free night out but what it seems like at least with our friends is just the right environment to let loose and have fun. We have tons of food left and the wrapped toys so they didn`t come for the handouts. It took us a while to get the right mix and we always seek to add to the mix. So for those who host or are looking for real and active swingers, just hang in there and keep building your contacts one at a time. We always enjoy meeting others and if there is no sexual attraction who cares, but if we like you then we will keep you in mind when interacting with others and might play cupid and introduce you to someone that might be more your taste. Social networking you might say.
Joe and Lori
Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Dress code for unspoken
Male bi - Why all the taboo about male bi - I find controversy within the swinging community almost silly. We are collectively engaged in an activity that most of our non-swinging peers would describe (at least in public) as way out there, far beyond the pale. However within our "open" community a few people tend to limit themselves and try to limit others by saying that I am right and thus everyone else is wrong.
We can have open discussion on soft swing and full swap, same room and open. We have clubs and parties and swinging resorts to talk about. Everyone has their own opinion, and most are very open to the opinion of others.
One area where the discussion does tend to polarize swingers is the subject of bisexual males.
Doesn't this strike you as odd? Bisexual females are perhaps the single most powerful driving force within the swinging community. And bisexual males are the closest thing we have to a paria.
Part of that is surely the fear of disease but not entirely. Fear of disease is a clear concern in all swinging and can be controlled. There are far fewer bisexual males in swinging than besexual females but we do not exclude straight females. Why the exclusion of bisexual males?
Perhaps times are changing and bisexual males will become an accepted part of the swinging community. In the interim we intend to at least give them the benefit of the doubt.
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