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We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - AMEN to that....alex
Discretion, the better part of valor - I love that saying - Being the female half here and in a "open" relationship.....
Your profile photos are bad... I mean in this lifestyle people like what they like and if you dont have enough photos to show what you are like in general.... then pass (at least for us anyway)
I always get more action then my hubby, he has the same issue....how to start up the conversation. Its hard enough for a actual single guy to get laid, let alone a married one without the woman thinking your a freak or cheating.
We go to parties, and then follow up with the ladies there. Thats where he's got the most single guy action from. Even then that conversation can be a hard one to start haha
I have a issue with my hubby not wanting to be "outed" in his professional circle so thats a difficult one. I'm very very very open and honest and that can be difficult for me to hide stuff like this (side note, I would NEVER out someone else, I just have a hard time keeping my own secrets!)
All I can say about that being outed thing. Take a walk in the mall, you'll see a couple hundred people that your more then likely never to see again, even though logically you live in the same area and do some of the same general things.
Loosen up, live a little. If she does see someone at work that she's slept with.. guess what... they've seen her too! All of the swingers I have met are very respectful and wouldnt come up and high five and say "Nice fucking you Sat, when can we do it again?" at a board meeting or something HAHA Just sayin'
Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - I guess I will make a much stronger response. The lifecoach is full of shit! My wife and I are both on second marriage and the previous ones fell apart because of cheating. It wasn't the sex it was the lies, the betrayal of trust. My wife and I love each other like crazy. Swinging is a recreational activity we could do without if we no longer like it. Even during swinging I am only sharing my wife's body, her heart belongs only to me and vise versa.
We didn't get into swinging to FIX anything. We got into it because we wanted to add to what is already great for us. It was not a replacement for something missing. our premise is making friends and if we have sex fine and if not we have a friend to do things with.
Also if anything swinging made me love my wife even more. Her love and trust for me cannot be affected even by me having sex with others. We have a couple of times swung (if that is the word) separately and she came back to tell me about it and did so with my knowledge that is what she was doing. And of course vise versa. We still trust each other and love each other. Plus while swinging I can see other men, or women, pleasing her and get a view of what she looks like from a different point of view than I have when making love to her.
As others have said, as long as you communicate, don't take things too personal, and maintain trust swinging will be fun and not hurt your relationship.
When I say don't take it personal I mean like one poster said you should be able to say "she give good head" or she is talented. LOL we had been with a guy in a threesome and the guy did something that I have never done and made the wife Cum really fast and hard. When she had recovered she blurt out without thinking "You have GOT to learn how to do that!!!!!"
It kind caught us both off guard but we laugh about it now. She didn't say "I love him more" She said "DAMN he has a technigue that send me through the roof!"
I have learned from the guy how to do it and have used the technique several times. Even if I can't duplicate it so what? She still LOVES what I do to her too. More importantly we still LOVE each other totally.
OK OK I willget off the soapbox. It just ticks me off that people who are supposed to be great at teaching relationships most of the time have relationships that suck yet they can tell you how to do it. BULL. Save the money for the LifeCoach and take a trip with a plane full of swingers and go to HEdonism III. It would be money better spent.
LOL I will quit now.
Question for the ladies - - Just asking them their size does not work. They are not truthful about it. It was not MY wife who laughed at the guy. She has been very patient with the guys so far, even though she hasn't gotten what she wanted. I hate to see her disappointed. We are exclusively looking for singlemen, we do not go to house parties or swingers clubs.
KSL swing story - - There is supposed to be a new recruiting poster - slogan - sister swingers want you!
Small Towns - - The most Mormon swingers are in Utah? Who'd a thunk? I've heard there are more Mexican swingers in Mexico than anywhere else. And I was told by a friend in the KGB that the FBI has one of the highest rates of crossdressers of any spy agency (started with J. Edgar Hoover and well...). Oh and they said the NSA was all a bunch of ferret molesting hermaphrodites. I put in that last part because it's true and because the NSA is reading all this stuff (down in Draper at that big ass spy building) and touching themselves inappropriately while doing so. And they've prolly made copies of ALL of y'all's naughty pics and all the fat geeky computer nerds are jerkin' it to all of our swinger photos. Hey NSA dudes! Don't you wish you knew what a real vagina felt like?[em]Emo_67[/em]
Disabled Swingers - - A couple of years ago when I wasn't sure what was going to happen physically with me I wondered what I'd do if I became "DISABLED". I thought about starting a site for DISABLED people but found there are already a few "dating" sites out there.
What are you really looking for? - More than the profile - [quote=SIMPLEPLEASURES]Looks like we end to arrange a party that is tailored for couples to meet and see if they mesh. [/quote]
We love these type of events, say ten couples or so in a casual type environment, to big and it seems you get lost in the crowd. Then you only talk to the ones you may already know.
Or maybe we should do a speed dating for swingers, ten couples and ten questions to give to each couple.
#1 do you like sex
#2 do you like sex
#3 do you like sex often
#4 if we have sex will we still be friends
#5 would you like sex now
#6 can we have sex again
#7-10 When can we ?
That may work huh
That may work huh
Swingers Party - Doesnt mean who ever is there is open to everyone elsa - Picking the right group of people to swing with is a very important part of the lifestyle. I avoid groups that don't know and apply swing etiquette. Rule ONE...No means NO! Rule TWO...No one should touch or kiss another without permission. I'm sure we all have encountered people that don't know the rules (or get so drunk they forget them) but I encourage an optimistic attitude and careful networking to find the swingers you are compatible with.
Christain Swingers? - - From an earlier post on the same subject...
I work in a church and know that most members here would frown upon the lifestyle. let me add that most of them are retired while I am in my late 20's.
But a young minister that we had here, who left to head up another chruch, and I had a number of discussions about sex and whatnot.
His opnion was that he didn't think God honestly cared what we did with our sex lives, that there were more important things to be concerned with. (as long as it doesn't negatively effect others)
I'm not sure if it's a generation thing?
My wife was rasied in a baptist church which seemed to be a "not talk about sex" kinda congregation, yet she and her family are very open in their discussions, some might say (me) a little too discriptive in their talks (like grandma and her new husband) but open none the less.
My basic theology is that Jesus doesn't want you to live a life of repentance or guilt but rather that you enjoy all that life has to offer, and most importantly be decent and caring towards others, not necessarily in a sexual way but in a friendship helping way.
The bottom line is that we all screw up from time to time, but don't dwell on it, learn from your mistakes, ask for forgivenness and move on to help others.
With all that said I'll step down from my soapbox now
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