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Are you a Swinger or Liver? - - Would "Ethical Non Monogamy" sound better to you. What we are talking about here is leaving the external societal rules behind and doing what we feel good with, sometimes that means we set our own rules. I'm sure that you have your own rules too, of one sort or anther. The Reason we Swingers have rules is that we enter this lifestyle with our own needs and wants and the needs and wants of our mates. We need to balance both while rejecting the conventional norm. Our sex life is like something out of an erotic novel that most people can't imagine is real, but we love it, rules and all.
Polyamory - three (or more)-way RELATIONSHIPS - Hey Halfbaked,
We have been in a quad relationship for 2 1/2 years with another couple we met as Swingers. There have been ups and downs, but we are all happier than we have been in our whole lives and we are all closer and more in love with our spouses than ever before. I think it works so well because each marriage has been 20 years plus and the other wife and I(I'm the Mrs) are Bi and in love as well. I would just caution you when it comes to introducing your children into this type of blended family. We live within walking distance of our BF & GF, but have chosen not to disclose the full details of our "friendship" to our children(ages 8 & 15) because we feel that it is hard enough to grow up nowadays under the best of circumstances and other people can be cruel and judgmental. I would not want my child to suffer in any way because of my lifestyle choice. I am not against blending families, it is just not something we are willing to risk. My biggest piece of advice would be to listen to others' advice objectively, but only do what is right and best for YOU and YOUR loved ones because every relationship is different and different things work for different people. Just always be completely honest and open with one another and discuss everyone's feelings whether they are good or bad. Good luck to you guys! You may want to search on Meetup to see if there is a Poly group in your area.
National Underwear Day Party on Friday- but can't post it! - Unable to enter location due to "state/province not recognized" error - Wait, what?!!? I thought swingers were sorta anti-underwear...and clothes. Doesn't underwear kinda get in the way of playing with each other's naughty bits? [em]Emo_49[/em]
Cuming out of the Swinger closet - - [quote=CNTRLCPL][quote=SJA]After some time in the lifestyle, we have recently started to break the news to some of our close friends that we are swingers.
We have great friends and so far they have taken the information really well. However, we have other friends that would never want to hear it, and god forbid if we ever told our family about it.
What are everyone else's thoughts about coming out of the "Swinger" closet?[/quote]
Have you even considered the implications for others that may want to stay "in the closet"? You may be committing "Swinger Suicide" as it were... your openness might be great for you, but other may want to stay behind the curtain and would not want to be outed by association. [/quote]
This is an excellent point we hadn't thought about. Luckily, we've only shared with a couple VERY close friends. Plus, we keep our vanilla friends and swinger friends quite separate to avoid this situation.
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - I don't kiss and tell but I am so angry.....this was the second time we played. I should have known but they said they were quiet and we just assumed they needed to get to know us and open up. They sure talked a lot pre 2nd playtime how fun it was gonna be etc. The guy asked the girl to leave in the middle of it without any explanation!!! Our intention of this post is only to avoid this in the future. We are really a fun couple and are very disappointed. We look forward to more mature, secure couples to get to know. Obvousily they weren't ready or on the same page. We really want all the couples that we play with to be 110% comfortable and both parties are into the situation and want to play.
Swingers Kickball Society - - We would like too
Hot Wife Anklets - Who knows what they are and notices them? - I think they're mostly an urban legend, at least as far as the myth of a woman who wears an anklet being into that particular sexual act. Yes, women in the "hotwife" lifestyle sometimes wear them. But so do other women of all ages and persuasions.
Personally, I wouldn't make any assumptions about a woman's sexual proclivities based on a particular piece of jewelry that she is or isn't wearing. I even had a neighbor once who I noticed wearing an anklet that actually SAID "Hotwife" on it. I guarantee that the only connotation it had for her was that she was a wife and her husband thought she was hot.
But if you enjoy wearing them, knock yourself out. Just don't assume all, or even many, of the people you encounter (outside of a swingers party) will know the implication. And fwiw I've seen more than one tween wearing them at the mall. So there's that....
closed doors? - - Ha ha to the comment about swingers parties being one big orgy. We have been to several parties and none of them have been that :( If anyone knows where they have those, please let us know:p
BUSTED! Your Kids Found Out Your Swingers. Now What? - - [quote=HANDSHOESNZ]Our daughter figuered it because of the handle. Turns out she and her husband are in the lifestyle. We have been to a party with them. A little odd but funny. The other two kids proably know but don't say anything they just accept the fact we are who we are. [/quote]
Hahaha...yes we can attest to the little bit of awkwardness at first with both the parents and the child with their spouse in attendance at our party...but it actually ended up being fun and pretty comical...
Now our kids (girl 11 1/2 and 2 boys 13 1/2 and 16 1/2) are pretty smart...they know we chat online, my daughter even caught me with my top off...I told her I was showing someone my piercings...they know we have friends over so they have to go for a sleep over or that we have parties that they CAN NOT be around...my daughter asked me one day what "swingular" was cuz she saw the banner across my open lap top...I told her it was just a chat site we belong to and explained that's where we have met many of our new friends...I know she isn't stupid and will soon put 2 and 2 together but I also know if she has questions she will ask...we have tried to raise our children with a very open and accepting attitude...as far as the boys go...I think they might know but choose to not bring it up...I know they will one day when their ready, and we will answer all their questions honestly...we will give them the same honesty and respect that we expect from them....kisses...Naugh-Ty (and Lucky B)
This lifestyle - What are we really? - I guess we are Poly-Swingers. Basically we are and have been swingers for some time now, I however, am quite poly and have several lady friends who I love deeply. Finding 2 couples is not as difficult as some might think. One of my lady friends is married and our families are quite close. Fact is they are not swingers at all but she is poly and he is poly friendly. The other is separated and both my wife and I love this lady to the ends of the earth. So we are poly.
Now, we are also swingers . We do have sex with people that we are not in love with. We do, however, care about people and we prefer to get to know people first before sex. We have been known to get it on on the first meeting if the chemestry is right.... I don't see any division in swinging because someone may be poly but enjoys sex with people that just hit it off.
Swingers are such a diverse group of people and there is room for whatever ones heart desires...from love to just sex. Find what's right for you and enjoy...
Ray
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