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Las Vegas Fun - Las Vegas Fun - So which one would be better for some out of towners? Anyone ever tried the "Las Vegas Swingers Party Club"
Friendship vs. spontaneity? - Are you here to make friends or just to fuck? - The perception of this lifestyle is that there is a whole lot of sex going on between everyone. Maybe if you are young slim and trim and willing to go to bed with everyone at the drop of a hat that is true. But that pretty much describes the young anyway. If that is your perception of all swingers, and you are here in Utah, then you are bound to be disappointed.
I think that this question comes up a lot because it is not a simple question for many of us and it seems to be posted by those seeking friends first. The end goal may be sex. But if that is your only goal then why do you say you are seeking friends. Friendships are not made in 30 seconds or a drink over at the pub. If that is what makes friendships in your mind then you are really just here for sex.
For us it is finding friends. Some folks that we meet we will play with and some we will be just friends with. It really boils down to a 4 way vote when it comes to the bedroom and maybe even being friends in the first place. And that is what makes finding friends and bedroom partners difficult. There is always the added fear of rejection that gets in the way when you want to anything anyone.
I look at all the complaints of one-nighters and couples that never speak again after sex. I can only surmise that for those folks sex is the only yard stick of friendship. You do not have to be sexually compatible to be friends.
We have found that if what you are looking for is friends, then it is easy to be part of the lifestyle. If what you are looking for is based on having sex then it is easy to be disappointed and difficult to be part of the lifestyle.
Furthermore we look at those that just want to screw and think how lonely their existence must be.
camping + swing + rv = FUN - - Anyone knows of a group of RVing swingers?
Small town fun - - Maybe you could plan something with other swingers when you are travelling or have a out of town vacation on holidays and swing during it.
STD Testing - How often are you tested? - The only thing is that the test results are pretty much only good for the day they were done. Unless someone gets tested and then stays in a vault cut off from anyone else until the test results come back there is no way to determine if they are still STI free. Even accounting for incubation periods an STI test is really only good for that MOMENT when your blood was drawn. Bottom line if you're going to swing first be okay with the real and inherent risks and second protect yourself to the extent that you feel okay with those risks. We do our homework about what diseases are out there and then act appropriately. To us it only makes sense to assume that EVERYONE has an STD (most adults are seropositive for HSV type 1 or 2 which are now almost interchangeable as to where they can and will induce a primary infection) and to protect ourselves accordingly. People that are super paranoid about sex cooties prolly shouldn't be swingers. JMO
Not even going to mention how some VERY common STI's don't have a reliable test and thus aren't routinely screened for.
Help us out.. Take this Survey - For Utah Swingers - Done
How did you come up with your profile name? - - We decided to become swingers and well, we had just had a very wild weekend, fucking every possible moment. We decided that we were indeed very wild, and were going to put our marriage year, but he made a typo and got stuck with 2004. Not as cool as glazed donut face, but hey it works for us. Especially with our wild grizzly bear sex ;)
Swingers Next Door! - ABC news story on Swinging! - The most honest, likely to happen, Real scene on the A&E show was when the cpl had discussed a "code word", and then when he used it , he didn't seem to catch it! or he didn't catch her reply!
Been there done that!!
Moab Utah - Swingers in Moab - Just got back...
Playing Alone - - Couples all have different rules. Many categorically refuse to play alone with ANYONE ever. This is their "security" place. They feel comfortable in the place where they can see each other and "protect" if necessary. It takes some people a long time to get passed this.
It's kind of a 'control' thing leftover from the vanilla life. I'm not saying it's bad, good or indifferent it's just the way it is. Some people take longer to get passed their histories as vanillas than others. As they progress and get more comfortable with themselves, the lifestyle, their partners then they will slowly open up and begin to trust a bit more.
Don't take it personally, that's the key. Many people still hang on to their vanilla background that their partners are their most 'valued' possession. I liken it to my $450 deep sea fishing reel. Sure I'll loan it to someone to use if I'm on the boat with them and can make sure they're taking care of it. Is there anyone I'd just let 'borrow' it out right for the day or weekend? Not a chance in hell.
It takes time to let go of that 'she's/he's mine' get feeling. I think my wife and I took almost 6 years before we got there successfully. We tried many times before that but it never worked out well for either of us. We finally came to a point where it's okay to play separately everything from next room to next state it no longer bothers us. I personally prefer within 30 - 50 miles so she get's home faster for the "after play" sex you're describing (which I really like too.)
You'll have to find a VERY secure, VERY established, VERY strong couple to fulfill your fantasy. They are out there, my wife and I for example but even though we're open to playing separately are we open to YOU playing with her or me separately? That's a different level of trust. Does it mean no? No. It means "maybe" in time it's a possibility. (I'm speaking hypothetically of course.)
Don't worry your "couple" or "person" will come along. You might also try investigating a subsection of the lifestyle called "hotwifeing" while I know few swingers who are hardcore into only hotwifing, there are quite a few that tip toe in that part of the lifestyle (quick def, she plays he doesn't except with her.) That's the post play joy for you and the play and post play joy for her. Most people just bounce between that and swinging. There are people out there just be patient and don't expect it from any current playmates that you have established rules with, they need to progress at their own speed.
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