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Help With Wife - Wife has fantasies but is super hesitant to experiment. - [quote=EVILDOERS]Personally I think you might be a little too eager (can't blame you, we all were when we started) and pushing just a little too hard to make her fantasy a reality. Rather than trying to find a way to get around the "Catch 22" of her fantasy maybe just explore it more verbally and see if it evolves into some kind of scenario that she is comfortable with that more easily can happen in the real world.
The most successful swingers we know, ourselves included, arrived at where they are by being open and supportive of each other's fantasies and desires without forcing them in any way. In other words, be patient, explore your fantasies verbally and maybe role play, a LOT, with each other before you jump into anything that either of you isn't quite ready for.
You might be surprised as you fantasize openly and honestly how your fantasies might evolve and become something that you eventually can and will make a reality. You know your wife better than anyone and maybe she does need a little nudge but most of the swingers we've known over the years who've crashed and burned did so because one partner pushed the limits too fast and didn't wait for the more hesitant partner to catch up. In our case we were quite surprised and what our fantasies morphed into when we really dug deep and talked about the truly deviant (by local standards anyway-lol) aspects of our fantasies.
Sorry, I know that's probably not the kind of advice you were hoping for but it's been our observation over a rather lengthy swinging career. Another thought, if you're bound and determined to make your first swinging experience a MFM, is to find a guy who is okay with just watching you two play or maybe getting involved in some soft swinging...i.e. back rubs and or touching but no intercourse. We were soft swap for the first year or two of our swinging life and it was great fun and took the pressure off until we were ready to take the next step. Best of luck!
edit- Sorry about what now seems like a long rambling response. In my defense it was pre-coffee. [em]Emo_79[/em] [/quote]
damn EVIL, I have read most of your responses and there are alot of smart ass comments. this however was not. This helps me and the MRS alot. thank you... BTW love the smart ass comments also..
Interacial Sex - - [quote=SHAZAMER]I have played with guys and gals from every race, color, type of cultural upbringinging, etc. that can be found in Utah. The stereotypes are just silly and stupid. There are hot & not so hot men of every race. What I do find intriguing is that most guys of races other than white, keep themselves physically fit after marriage and take pride in their appearance. This seems to be much more rare in married white men. A shame! Also, seems like white swingers like to smoke. A lot. This is a turn off for me, so I tend to steer clear.
xoxoxo
Monika[/quote]
So does this apply to the gals to or just the guys? We've found that a huge % or swingers smoke not just the pale ones.
This one time at Swingers Camp - Discussion about N by N camp out - Another great year at camp! The work that Lang, Dre, Sue...and everyone else that makes this happen is appreciated here! For us one of the best things about this outing is the opportunity to make new friends! Sorry we didn't get around a bit more this year, but Thanks to everyone who made the extra effort to introduce yourselves to us! Don't be strangers...drop a line sometime!
This lifestyle - What are we really? - I guess we are Poly-Swingers. Basically we are and have been swingers for some time now, I however, am quite poly and have several lady friends who I love deeply. Finding 2 couples is not as difficult as some might think. One of my lady friends is married and our families are quite close. Fact is they are not swingers at all but she is poly and he is poly friendly. The other is separated and both my wife and I love this lady to the ends of the earth. So we are poly.
Now, we are also swingers . We do have sex with people that we are not in love with. We do, however, care about people and we prefer to get to know people first before sex. We have been known to get it on on the first meeting if the chemestry is right.... I don't see any division in swinging because someone may be poly but enjoys sex with people that just hit it off.
Swingers are such a diverse group of people and there is room for whatever ones heart desires...from love to just sex. Find what's right for you and enjoy...
Ray
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - I am saying that that logic doesn't justify intolerance. My analogy is logical. It's you that can't distiguish the meaning or ok in society, where it's impairative that we all get along to coexist safely and will our freedom intact. The majority say that swinging is wrong. Yet here you are. It is the KKK's opinion that blacks are monkeys and subhuman, does that make it socially acceptable? You're saying it's ok to be racist and or intolerant.
-D-
Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - Great post. We agree and would love to be involved with a group like you've described. We know it takes work and time and everyone working toward the same goals.
Please include us in building a swingers paradise
Cap d'Agde France - - We wonder if many members have visited Cap d'Agde in France.
It is tw world's greatest swingers' paradise.
It is a nudist resort with ove 30'000 naturist in resdence at any one time in the summer months, with several swing clubs open in the evening.
We try to visit once a year.
Let us know if you a a couple interested in joining us
Other activities? - Do you only meet swingers for sex? - 90% of the people we meet we meet for friendship only......... there are only 10% that we click with to go further. We think the open friendship is the best part of the lifestyle.
Its nice to have friends for clubbing, camping, bowling, etc......... One\'s that aren\'t shocked at your behavior...LOL
Our lifestyle friends are probably the best friends we\'ve ever had..... Must be what we have in common huh?
Private Pic BullSh**T! - - [quote=BLUEIDKAT][quote=SHERA_HEMAN3]I don't get it. We are on a sight to see if we wanna share each other. Why not show everyrhing up front. It's not like i dont want someone with the sane intrests to see what i look like. Why do we have to be private. Ultimatly we are all here for the same thing does it matter if another swinger sees your face. Lol two cents. [/quote]
I guess my point is that if other swingers were the only people on here, it wouldn't matter. However, this is and open website that excepts anyone temporarily and anyone permanently with enough cash. THEY DON'T DO BACKGROUND CHECKS! There are a lot of liars on here, plus occasional law enforcement and self righteous do-gooding crusaders. Don't assume its just the ones who hide their faces. And don't criticize me if I choose to be more cautious than you. I may be in a position in my private live where that is necessary. Look at all the trouble facebook causes people looking for a job. Can you imagine if they started checking swingular?
Besides I'm in Utah. This is the state where the Church sends people down to Trails to record license plates. This is the state that requires your name be entered into a data base when you go to a bar or strip club. This is the state that allows the printing of a weekly newspaper that shows the arrest report and photo of anyone taken into custody, locally or state wide. I live in Utah. I'm paranoid for a reason. [/quote]
I think a lot of it is paranoia. I've lived in Utah 30+ years and have been on this site for over 6 years and others for longer than that. Never had any issues with the state, church or police. Hell I know police officers that are on here fucking away like the rest of us. AND it's funny how many people are church-goin, law-abiding, Mom and Dad types by day and naughty swingers by night.
My point was, you don't have to show your face in your public profile. Hence the name "Private" pics. No one can see those unless you ask to see them. Generally people strike up some sort of conversation and develop a level of trust before inviting them to see the full monty. Just a little common sense and good judgement will prevail in this lifestyle. I've yet to see the porn police, but someone let me know when they raid Swingular and throw us all in Mormon jail for being naughty naughty people. :)
Signals, Identifying 'markers' - Do scarves, jewelry, or other items worn a certain way ID you as part of the lifestyle? - We have never heard of the gold ring but the pendant that is growing in popularity in Utah seems like a nice way to distinguish swingers in crowd. Being both straight, we prefer to be upfront and just say it like it is so there are no surprises. We have brought the pendant up in a few groups we belong to or run here in Florida and hope we can follow Utah and make this the universal way to find each other in a crowd.
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