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single males - - Thank you for opening the topic. I hope that it will be used shed some insight and not just complain.
In a place like Habits there are vanilla singles that have no clue that swingers congregate there. So there will naturally be more problem in that environment than a private party.
At a house party the only people that should be there are those that are invited by the host and hostess. Every one of the guests should have known the rules or etiquette of this lifestyle. If you had complaints, they should have been addressed last night with the hosts. Evidently the balance you were looking for was not there.
Sadly it is difficult for most singles to figure out how to talk to a swinging couple. There are no schools or training centers to teach this. As a single male, conversation at a vanilla party with a couple is much easier. Most often the men and women separate and we talk with one or the other without expectations on either side. Sometimes conversation is just conversation.
I find that making friends is generally more difficult in this lifestyle because of the sexual expectations of many. I think that you will find a number of the single men, after getting the cold shoulder from many husbands, find it easier to attempt to talk to the women because they lack the skills to talk with both. It is a mistake but it is also part of the learning process.
There is no excuse for rude behavior on the part of the single male but neither is there an excuse for the typical married male attitude. Single males are always and have always been a pariah and dam few couples want them at any party. I came into this lifestyle as a single male looking to make male friends to hang with that would help me understand the rules. I found most of the males were cold and suspicious and difficult to talk with.
I was not looking for women to play with nearly as much as I was looking for a girlfriend that was already in the lifestyle. But I am sure that as far as most were concerned all I wanted to find was their wife
member profiles - - [quote=CHEFFETTE][quote=EVILDOERS]Now now, CHEFFETTE. Don't get yourself in a tizzy. Remember your blood pressure. Also remember that some people don't consider SINGLES as swingers. They just consider it hooking up. Now make yourself a nice cup of Chamomile tea or a Xanax smoothie and take a little nap. You'll feel MUCH better and then you can rip those damned cheaters a new asshole all night long. [em]Emo_49[/em] [/quote]
Seems to me they have all the asshole they could ever need.
You're right that some singles (ahem, me) aren't considered swingers b/c they don't hook up w/ couples, but the context of this thread is a website for married people wanting to cheat. [/quote]
Actually I wasn't referring necessarily to singles who don't hook up with couples. I was referencing that old couples (okay mostly married guys who aren't bi) argument that swingles don't bring as much (or anything, depending on who you're talking to) to the table. Personally we think anyone can call themselves a swinger...and some actually are regardless of their marital status. Whether or not they truly have a swinger's mindset is something altogether different. Some singles do, many don't. And to be fair, there are couples who don't either.
Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - The only way any relationship works is mutual respect/love/caring/communication. It doesn't matter if it's a marriage, LTR, or any other possible configuration. As proof I would submit that 60+ to 70+ percentage of marriages, both first and second, fail in the "normal" world. Also in poles taken, 60 to 70% of all married people or people in relationships have had relationships outside of marriage without their partner's knowledge.....i.e., "CHEATING". Swingers can hardly cheat, although it sometimes happens... Divorce in the swinging community is about one quarter of that in the "normal" community. I would submit that the reason for this is
a. the partners respect and love and trust each other as no other group does.
b. the need or want to cheat is virtually eliminated...
c. communication needed for the trust and the ability to work thru hard relationship problems is in place and working well
d. RESPECT for each other as individuals is greatly enhanced. Jealousy is part fear and part possessivness... Fear of loosing, fear that someone is better, fear that they are inadequate.. and many more fears are basiclly absent. And possessivness is not possible if you and your wife or SO are sharing yourself with others.
One thing about swinging.... If your relationship is good, communications are good and your sex life is good .....Swinging might very well work for you, as a couple. If there are any problems, fix them first or stay out of swinging... A good relationship will generall be enhanced by swinging. A relationship with problems will generally magnify problems introduce problems and ultimately cause devistation in that relationship.
You life coach has their head where the sun doesn't shine...and knows not of what he spake...
Amen
Royal Night In Hell - after party Oct. 26 - Well, we can agree that at any of our parties there will be sexy swingers that love sex and that is nothing to complain about. I hope everyone enjoys their parties and stay safe.
Swingers Rock Club - Live music, Dancing, and Sexy Friends - Just to let you know this next party has free prizes and give-aways all night as provided by adult sponcers.
Clubs or hangouts - - [quote=Wildfire]Scorez in lehi? Never tried it...we live really close ...we will give it a shot[/quote]
It's unlikely you'll find any 'swingers' there unless you specifically organize something.. or a group that goes there tells you when and where to meet them. =)
Per Couple40's suggestion above... the best way to "meet groups" is to organize a group meetup.. places like Scorez occasionally are used for this.. where 3 or 4 couples will meet up to grab a table and chat.
And, as mentioned, the events listed on this site.
swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - hey dumb shit waaaaaa you are the one rebelling.you are the one that started whining about thread topics that YOU do not like.in your opionion no one else should like them either.if you will check the forum site again,that is where you went to start this thread,there is a section titled just talk and if you open your eyes a little more under that heading it says"non lifestyle related topics...".it does not say non lifestyle related topics that every one agrees to.as to name calling i do not believe i was calling anyone a name,but you are slinging quite a few around.seems to me i defended you on the spelling issue.but truth be known either you did not go to school at all or didn't listen when you were there because a fucking complete moron spells a whole lot better than you.now like every one has said if you do not like a threads topic then don't read it.it is just like television if you do not like what is on(now i am only assuming this)you change the channel.and if you think i am calling you a moron let me assure you i am not as a moron can spell better.
Phil
Facebook group - - [quote=LIVNITUP]Seems like we read where there is a swingers Facebook group. Does anyone know if this true? If so, how do we find it?[/quote]
There was one for the Daybreak area. It was a lot of fun! I wish I could find it again!
seniors - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single ladies? - I am 52, and considered a senior or close to it, and i have had more pus----y than a lot of these kids who think they are all that. I have my memories of the 20year olds I have been with and they remember me too. though they are now 40. Age isnt that important.I dont feel insulted by the discussion at all.
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - Black Lincoln MKX
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