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That little nudge many of us need - - [quote=PARTYINLV][quote=EVILDOERS]There are plenty of people on Swingular, ourselves included, who strongly prefer to meet and get to know people a bit (sometimes over weeks or even months) before any kind of 'sexy time' happens. In fact, for us at least, we're happy just to hang out and be friends even if sex NEVER happens. There are also avowed demi-sexuals here who absolutely need some kind of emotional connection (and no, it doesn't necessarily have to be romantic or love or anything beyond friendship) before they can feel sexual attraction to other people. Perhaps your wife is more oriented in that direction. Beyond that, maybe it would be more above-board to just hang out with vanillas and see if you can slowly evolve your friendship towards something more sexual. Just a thought.[/quote]
We have friendships with vanilla couples who we think are smoking hot and wish they were in the lifestyle. lol. Perhaps this is a question for another forum thread. But, how does one broach the subject with a vanilla couple who are friends? Does anyone have any success stories of how you converted a vanilla couple friendship to the lifestyle? We would be afraid about outing ourselves or maybe even losing a friendship. [/quote]
Personally, we think the best way to broach that subject with vanillas is to just, at some point in the friendship, put it out there that you're swingers and then let the other couple process, digest, and come to terms with that information and do with it what they will. We feel like there are FAR too many swingers who enjoy 'vanilla hunting' and use unfair tactics (alcohol, late nights, etc.), if not outright subterfuge, to try to 'convert' them as, I guess, some kind of power trip. If you let people have the space to come to a rational, informed decision on their own there is, IMO, FAR less chance for drama (or WORSE!) as a sequela.
weight approperate - - We have been in the lifestyle together for 10 years now and couples not being up front about just wanting to play with the wife alone has always been a problem with us. We let people know upfront we only play together.
Now on the weight subject...We advertise ourselves unashamedly about being a BBW/BHM couple. We also let people know if its Ken and Barbie they want they need to move on down to the next profile. We have played with HWP couples as well as with Big Beautiful Couples like ourselves. The HWP couples we have played with in the past have been amazed at our level of inhibition and sensuality. In short it was an eye opener for them...Big people can be very sexual.
One thing we have noticed is that lifestyle web sites, magazines and clubs seem to perpetuate the Barbie and Ken mystique. How often on a swinger web site have you seen a BBW, BHM of even a BBC on their front page? The same goes for magazines and advertising for clubs and lifestyle conventions and events. Even here on Swingular we have yet to see even a featured member that is a person or couple of size. In our humble opionion it's something swingers media needs to address.
Our whole take on the topic is this...If your mind is so closed that you can not see beyond exteriors then its your loss.
We started a Yahoo group called Big Beautiful Couples and Ladies a couple years ago with the idea that if membership grew large enough maybe organizing an event similar to Lifestyles or Hedonism II. Though the membership is small we still have the passion for the idea of a convention with Big Beautiful People as the primary attendees. We are still checking to see if there is a similar group here on Swingular and if not we'll be getting it rocking and rolling.
If we want people in the lifestyle to be more accepting of size (both women & men) we have to learn to be our own best advocates.
Have an erotic day
Howie & Susie
Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - Thanks for your replies! Tori & Tan
So far here's the totals:
Scorpio 9
Cancer 7
Sagittarius 4
Aries 4
Pisces 4
Gemini 3
Capricorn 3
Aquarius 3
Virgo 2
Libra 2
Taurus 2
Leo 1
S#!% swingers say - - I don't know how many have seen the youtube video "Shit Swingers Say," but it's pretty funny.
I don't know if I can embed video on this forum, but I will try. If this doesn't work, just search youtube for "shit swingers say." You will laugh, or your money back!
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - yeah we know ,,been there done that,,same here,,
but some are better at puting it in words,then others
and there spelling ant perfect along with there grammer.
but that does not make them a bad person..
we have seen single men but we like to pick them,
not the other way around,,
and will you ublock me as im not quoting emails in the forum anymore lol
Alton
Swinger & 🦄 Bait - An experiment to attract swingers and unicorns. - unicorn bait won't tell lure me in;)
I’m defense of single males - Funny old geezers - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET][quote=PARTYINLV]We are in our sixth year on this site. We are also currently on three more sites, even after dropping two more. When we joined Swingular, we were taken aback from the negativity toward single guys. We did not see this this level of animosity on any other of the sites we are or were on.
Aside from the folks from Idaho and Wyoming (and very, very few nationwide), this site is predominately Utah based. I am not negatively judging Utah since a survey or research was never done, but we had to wonder if this hatred is a Utah thing. Or was it a few couples who made it seem normal to hate and everyone just jumped on the bandwagon? Human history has taught us that ostracizing is easier than accepting. Who knows? We certainly don't understand it.
Many couples correctly point out that single guys are not [b]"swingers"[/b] since they don't swap. But, we believe that single guys are part of the [b]"lifestyle"[/b] for many couples. Why is fmf ok, but mfm is not ok?
As a side note: The vast majority of our play is with couples(our preference). But we occasionally like mfm for the different dynamics it offers. We have been very lucky with mfm and haven't had a bad experience yet, which I cannot say is always true with every couple we've met.[/quote]
We live here. Our experience is that most couples do not hate single men. Most married men are not intimidated by the presence of single men. Most couples and singles whether super active or rarely active in the lifestyle don’t post anything in the forum section of this website. As is the case with so much on the internet, a few of us that do read or post in the forums, may give others the impression that we are a good general representation of the community’s mindset. Obviously we aren’t. What we read here is mostly just personal preferences. There are some thoughts expressed that we find interesting, sometimes enlightening. Sometimes people are just venting. Sometimes it’s angry venting stemming from personal experience. As for insecurities, we all have at least a few.[/quote]
Perhaps I am just mistaking the complaints I see in forums on the home page as a reflection of the general attitude here
Cum One Cum All!!! - - i hope they make a bracelet for nazi swingers...red and black with a cute little swastika. comes with matching lil mustache and inherent hatred for anyone not aryan.
and just a couple pages back i read something about sending the "wets" back to where they came from? i guess when you are racist you dont notice when other people are being racist.
there is a guy who just started at my work. he is from Venezuela. doesnt speak a lot of english. i know enough spanish to direct him but it frustrates me. ive worked with people from vera cruz, mexico who refuse to learn english or speak it. ive worked with bosnians who dont speak very much english...tibetans..muslims arabs...israelis and palestinians...and a turkish guy who GREW UP HERE and still doesnt speak much english. i do agree that they should put some effort into learning the language of the country they are living in...just like if i went to their country i would be required to learn their language...they aint gonna change for me...although i do make an effort to learn a couple phrases in their language for fun. thats pretty much all that bugs me about immigrants in this country...the language barrier. gives you a reason to get to know them...maybe if you heard their stories you would understand why they are here. one of the bosnians i worked with was royalty in her country...maids..their equivalent of millions of dollars...but in the war, their houses were demolished or used for army personnel. so they came to our country and now work as maids and cooks in hospitals. in their country they dont work...the guys work, and the women cook and clean..so coming here is hell for them..but they are here..they have no choice. you want to send them back to their country? their bullet ridden houses and swimming pools full of corpses..? i couldnt live with myself sending someone back to that hell.
Where do you go have Adult only sexual fun in Vegas... - Sexual fun - We really think it depends on what you are looking for...If you are a SOCIAL BUTTERFLY, and not afraid to approach people you will do well at the RED ROOSTER, it is always a full house on FRIDAY and SATURDAY nights. COUPLES OASIS was more laid back, but too cliquish for us (WE ARE CONSIDERED AS KEN AND BARBIE'S MOM & POP). Now if you just want to get down and dirty, and have some BUTT-NAKED fun, we highly recommend SWINGERS CIRCLE on THURSDAY nights, all I'm going to say is, clothes are not an option, within the first 30 minutes everyone is naked. It is a little more expensive, but it is well worth it. Hope this helps. Deedee & Larry
Swinging as solo Male part of a couple? - - My wife and I have been swingers for a while but she is not playing for at this time. She still attends parties with me and nude swims and such. She will goto meet/greets with me to assure all concerned that i am honest about our understanding. I changed my profile to reflect this and it has been since she stopped in January with not outside playtime for me.
I know the world of swinging is a challenge for the single guy and I expected to find less playfriends but I thought that with a full disclosure of the honest situation would have attracted some that appreciate those that don
