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Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Password for 1/28: "I've heard it's going to get steamy in here tonight..."

KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - Based on the previews, it doesn't sound like it's going to be a positive story. People who didn't set appropriate boundaries and blame the swinging lifestyle for their failed relationships. Even vanilla relationships will fall without open communication, honesty, and trust. At least with this lifestyle, we know our partner is thinking about sex with others. Those in monogamous relationships have to hide that from each other, even though they do think about it.

Black Ring, Right Hand - How to tell if someone's a swinger - [quote=TMACA]The thing is, even though people in the vanilla world may know about something like black rings on the right hand, they probably won't notice it, especially with all the people wearing multiple rings nowadays. Most people just aren't all that observant. On the other hand, swingers who know about it will probably look for them. And if someone who doesn't also have one on asks you what's with the black ring, you can just say,"I like it." And if they then say "Did you know that it can mean ....?", you can say something like "Why do you think that?", or "Where'd you hear that?", which can lead to them saying they swing, or let you get out of the conversation without admitting anything yourself.~ Terry[/quote] That may be true up to a point but think about what other cues you see when you see an attractive couple and wonder if they're swingers. Dress a little sexier than normal, act a little flirtier or maybe dance a little dirtier (if they're at a club), are constantly looking around checking out other people. That doesn't happen in the vanilla world. Most guys would at very least get an elbow to the gut if their lady caught them openly checking out an attractive girl. In swinging, the lady will often check out the attractive girl right along with her husband. I still think that the majority of swingers wouldn't wear the rings even if they became "a thing". As someone mentioned this isn't a new concept. People have been talking about ways to make it easier to identify other swingers when out and about almost since the day we started swinging decades ago. On another swing site we're on they even made a mobile app that people could put on their smart phones that would alert them if another swinger was nearby and also had the app turned on. If the app showed (by GPS) another swinger near you you could send them a text. It was a colossal failure to say the least. I know there are definitely a small percentage of swingers who would wear black rings and/or use an app but the majority would likely not due to fear of discovery. Why do you think many or most profiles have face pics only in the locked sections and mention discretion so ubiquitously? Especially here in Utah where the prevailing religion has such strict morality codes, many people would rightly be afraid of losing their jobs and social standing if discovered. JMO

The males of couples I need your help!! - I am trying to understand my husband and male pride.But been that I am not a male this is hard.So please help. - First: We were childhood sweethearts. (At the age of 12.) We are best friends. We have been together for 10 years,been married for 8 years.For the ten years we have only be with each other.Before we were togrther I had been with 5 men (I do mean men.When I was a teen,I went out with men : 18 to 23.) Before we were togrther he had been with 7 girls.I was with one woman and Chris was there but we had to stop before we got started.(she only when down on me and Chris was watshing but then I told him to go down on her,so he did.Then we had to stop because someone was try to come in the room.We were at a house party.This is why we are here. Second: We are in the same place regarding swinging.I only want to be with another woman.I do not want to be with another man.(We both are not ready to have another man with us.)I just thought it would be easyer to fine a couple to do what we want.Then to find a single female.Because every where I go everyone is saying the samething " There are not as many single females looking for coupls as there is couples looking for single females."Please reread the post.It saids that We want to be with a single bi-female..... I only want the women to play and the men to watch...... Third: Nothing can get in the way of our marraige.We would never leave each other.We have been through too much together.At 18 we got back together and we had our frist miscarrage.At 19 we had our frist son and our son and I almost die and we had our second miscarrage and was told by a DR. that I could not have any more children.For 4 year we had sex maybe once a month because it hart to have sex.(When we had sex it was over real fast because he did not want to hurt me.)He never steped out on me.He never thought to step out on me.at 23 we had our second son.What ever was wrong with me was gone because it did not hart to have sex any more.At 25 we had our daughter and I almost die having her.For the past 2 years we have wild sex almost every night.After having kids we finely got our sex life back.Now if only I can get my body back. LOL <(That is a joke Chris loves my body) Chris is the best man out there for me.I should know because I have been looking for a husband since I was 16.All the men I went out with only cared about themselves and what they could get.Chis cares about me and trys to give me everything I want.THAT IS WHY WE ARE HERE.Because he is trying to give me what I want.He is the type of person that would give you the would if he could. Just so you know we as a couple have researched the swingers lifstyle for a year before we as a couple decieded to join the swingers lifestyle. We wrote this together.I just typed it . Candy & Chris

3 some!! - Just curious - So based on the fact that it's a swingers site.... Most of us to some degree. However the variations on the theme of m

Creating an Amazing Swingers Profile - How to market yourself better - [quote=UTAHSJCOUPLE]Shit! We aren't verified. We are totally screwed! ~The Mrs.[/quote] I hereby certify the Mrs is real. I further certify that good spelling gives her a lady boner!

What about the lifestyle didn't meet your expectations? - Preconceptions and disappointment. - I'm home bored, so stop here if you don't want to read a bunch of shite. lol. I think we both entered the lifestyle with some preconceived notions of what the people in the LS would be like, but that was mostly from our limited experience with being vanilla and having LS peeps try to hit on us. It just seemed creepy, desperate and gross at the time. We assumed most of the players would be super aggressive, ready to fuck anyone and have zero interest in relationships outside of sex. Our initial entry was simply to watch and be watched. We quickly learned that there are just as many wonderful people in the LS as out of it. Maybe more. There will always be the outliers, the few percentage on each end of the spectrum that are more extreme, but that happens in any population. Overall, it was a happy surprise. So that would be a negative expectation that wasn't met. As far as things we were hoping would happen or expectation that weren't met, we have very few. But we also went into the labyrinth without really expecting or assuming anything. I don't think we were naive enough to think that this segment of the population was somehow immune from the social characteristics that reveal themselves in any other social class or group. You will always have the "cool kids" the "shy people" the "jocks" the "geeks" the people who classify themselves as the "pity party" and blame the world for their problems. Those things will exist anywhere and should. Swingers are a diverse group of people with a few, maybe very few, common goals. Those goals I think are to meet others with social deviancy and those interested in expanding their sexual experiences or simply to meet new friends. Swinging, in itself, doesn't solidify your beliefs in anything else (politics, food preferences, choice of travel location, or even how or what you are looking for as swingers). I think that is where expectations can fail. If a person goes into a situation thinking, "I/we think "x" so everyone else must think "x" as well", they are bound to be disappointed. I've said this a lot of times, the lifestyle is not black and white. Life isn't black and white. There will be frustrations around every turn if you allow yourself to be duped into thinking your way of thinking is more than just your viewpoint, that it is universal to everyone. I see people complaining of flakes, people who meet once then run away, etc. That's how they roll. That's their truth. It's what they are comfortable with or wanting and who am I to judge. That being said, I don't have to associate with them and hopefully learn how to avoid that situation or become more efficient at finding people with similar interests. The lifestyle is work. Sometimes a lot of work. I think it's foolish to think that it should be easy to find 4 people who all jive. Think about how many people you have dated before settling on the right one for you. And to assume that somehow changes in the lifestyle and that after chatting on kik for a few weeks then meeting over drinks will somehow magically connect you. Ugh. Sometimes it happens. Sometimes not. But I wouldn't expect it. For others, the thought of any connection past the one-nighter is absurd. Why would you want to make friends with your fuck-buddies? It may be too risky and cause too many emotions. Point is, we are all different and that is what makes the journey so beautiful. And, just a note about flakes, since it is a recurrent theme. Yes, maybe there are more flakes in the lifestyle, but I'm guessing it's specifically related to the nature of the LS. Swinging for some can be very intimidating and frightening. Sometimes the chase is much more fun than the fucking. Not excusing them that do flake, it seems a problem for sure, but I think I understand, at least in part, why it happens so much. There is so much social pressure not to be in the lifestyle and most were brought up without it being the normal way to live. So society is telling us we are wrong, gross, deviant, etc. Add to that the fear of actually getting naked and fucking someone else and it can cause a lot of anxiety in some. When we first started we were petrified to even go the parties thinking it was going to be a fuck/rape fest. lol. Turned out we were wrong but it was a learning process. Lastly, if you are already treading carefully and the couple/person you are supposed to be meeting gives off any bad vibes, maybe flaking is best. It's hard not to hurt someone's feelings and honesty isn't always what happens. I know we have been honest with couples and it turned into a shit-show. Why don't you like us? If you only meet us and give us a chance we can prove we are wonderful. Other's like us, why don't you. It's hard to be honest at times about why there isn't a connection. May flaking be a way to spare feelings? I don't know. There are probably a plethora (Hefe, do you know what a plethora is?)of reasons people flake and some of those my be that they are just douches. But likely there are other people that aren't and are just trying to get out of a situation they are unfamiliar with. Avoid the douches but maybe give those others a second chance. Evil: always good topics you bring to the table. So you think because people like sex they should be good at it? I know a lot of people who love food but suck at cooking. haha. Maybe having too many options on the table can also make people lazy. I don't have to try hard if I know tomorrow is another partner. To some it's the quantity and not the quality. But I can see why the expectation would be there. All in all we really have no complaints. It's been a fascination journey. Some ups, some downs, but always and adventure. We will keep our expectations low, both of ourselves and those around us. Less disappointment that way. I'm going back to sitting in my underwear, drinking a beer and watching TV. Zero expectations. haha. :) Mr. SRO

Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - We are a professional, naughty, highly sexual couple that wants to find another couple(s), and a single male or female that we know are safe that we can play with worry-free. Or a trusted group of couples and singles. I know most people are or say they are, but we’d like to establish a level of comfort where fluids won’t hinder us. We like to go ALL in and if we can establish some regulars that we can trust, think of the no holds barred fun we could all have. We could turn our home into a weekend pleasure palace. A place where you could arrive at, become friends with everyone, and have your way with anyone at the house knowing they’re all safe, and all want to make you feel good. Food, drinks, hot people, hot sex, and LOADS of fun and memories. We’re working on a hot tub now. So expect that too. Let us know what you think and if you want to be considered. Single males, we’ll invite you as well as select you. It will be on a case by case and requested basis.

Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - We are very interested in meeting new couples. I had two friend requests just this past week and I replied with my cell number, asking to get together for drinks or dinner but they haven't contacted me. I wonder if people are just looking for pictures or to get a large list of friends. Its interesting because they contacted me first....lets meet!

Gloryhole - Any glory holes in northern utah? - So from what I've gathered, Habits is a common place for swingers. My girl and I are new to the life style and it seems our schedules never match up with the meet and greats. It is good to know there is a place we can go to when we are free to meet similar people.