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Translating Personals/Swingers Ads - - HOW TO TRANSLATE PERSONAL ADS:
WOMEN'S ADS
40-ish...................................49
Adventurer...........................Slept with all your friends
Athletic................................No boobs
Average looking...................Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful...............................Pathological liar
Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated..............................Banged her Political Science professor
Emotionally Secure...............Medicated
Feminist...............................Fat ballbuster
Free spirit............................Junkie
Friendship first.....................Trying to live down reputation as a slut
Fun......................................Annoying
Gentle..................................Comatose
Good Listener......................Borderline Autistic
New-Age............................All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned......................Lights out, missionary position only, no BJs
Open-minded......................Desperate
Outgoing..............................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate............................Sloppy drunk
Poet.....................................Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional..........................Certified Bitch
Redhead...............................Bad dye-job
Reubenesque........................Grossly Fat
Romantic..............................Looks better by candle light
Social...................................Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray
Voluptuous...........................Very Fat
Height/weight proportional....Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate...................Stalker
Widow.................................Drove first husband to shoot himself
Young at heart. ....................Old bat
--------
MEN'S ADS
40-ish.....................................52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic...................................Watches a lot of NASCAR
Average looking......................Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated................................Will patronize the shit out of you
Free Spirit..............................Banging your sister
Friendship first.......................As long as friendship involves nookie
Fun........................................Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking.........................Arrogant
Very good looking..................Dumb as a board
Honest....................................Pathological Liar
Huggable................................Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Likes to cuddle.......................Insecure mama's boy
Mature...................................Older than your father
Open-minded.........................Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested
Physically fit............................Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Poet.......................................Wrote ex-girlfriend's phone number on a bathroom stall
Sensitive.................................Cries at chick flicks
Very sensitive.........................Gay
Spiritual..................................Got laid in a cemetery once
Stable.....................................Arrested for stalking, but not convicted
Thoughtful...............................Says "Excuse me" when he farts
Hanging out this weekend - Habits tonight?? - We are going tonight. we keep hearing about the club Habits and we want to go there and meet new people. When are the nights that swingers go? How will we know if someone there is a swinger? And just any advice for a new couple?
Soft swap - Soft swap vs Full swap - Maybe soft swap for swingers is kinda like anal sex for little Christian virgin chicks. They don't call anal "God's Loophole" for nothing. LOL
[video]http://youtu.be/j8ZF_R_j0OY[/video]
Lifestyle oriented documentaries? - - Secret Lives of Swingers was a documentary on Prime, I believe. It shows the good and some potential problems that can occur.
Blindfolded Gangbang 12/13 in Murray - - [quote=Sm435]**UPDATE**
We have 4 reliable tall attractive guys coming. We did this a couple weeks ago with +4 and with everyone staying for round 2 it was all she could handle, even had to shower in the middle of it. So we are capped with single males.
We have a few more that would like to join but we need another couple with a PARTICIPATING female before we can add more. We are totally laid back, comfortable and fun to be around. The males invited are also fun and comfortable.
So,if there is a couple that would like to join, please PM YOUR KIK USERNAME. With work restrictions, this is the only way we can have a conversation, and you will need to live pic verify on kik. Sorry if that is too much, but with all the fake couple profiles here we must have that in order to be invited.
DO NOT CONTACT us if both parties are not 100% in and 100% excited to join us and can bring that fun vibe with them. We will have enough fun as it is, but we are swingers and love to share.
PM you KIK username and be able to answer a few questions and live verify together.[/quote]
Do report back on how it went or I'll just send you a PM. Enjoy yourselves tonight!
Having a Swingres day at lagoon - Swingers at lagoon - would any one be interested in swingers day at the hogle zoo?
Swingers' club to shut after disabled access complaint - - http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/2013/05/26/09/22/swingers-club-forced-to-shut-after-disabled-access-complaint
Seems if they can't shut a decent Swingers club down one way, they'll do it another. Sorry for all of you Utahns that were going to to your friendly neighborhood swingers club in Woolloongabba, you'll have to look elsewhere. You have to wonder how financially onerous it would have been to make it disabled accessible.
Hell, a swingers club in Utah wouldn't even get to the point where they'd have to use that kind of legal obscurity to shutter it.
Mr. Sexperimentors
How did you get started? - - My hubby was interested in exploring his fantasy of being with 2 women in which I told him of my interest in having a 3some with 2 men. He started doing searches on the interent and came across some swingers sites and showed them to me. It took him so convincing to get me to agree to this, but I'm glad I decided to give it a shot...not entirely for the sexual experiences, but for the numerous friendships that we have made in the process!
XOXO
~~K~~
Children's Book 🤣 - Tim and Kate are Swingers - Just went on amazon and found the set available :D!
https://www.amazon.com/Reach-Around-Books-Season-One-Collectors/dp/1946178055/ref=sr_1_1?adgrpid=1337006711850982&hvadid=83562991723720&hvbmt=bp&hvdev=c&hvlocint=190&hvlocphy=80155&hvnetw=o&hvqmt=p&hvtargid=kwd-83563283253286%3Aloc-190&hydadcr=15937_10815777&keywords=reach+around+books&qid=1658342369&sr=8-1
Young swingers party - sold out, who still wants to party ? - [quote=EVILDOERS][quote=LOOKIN4FUN369][quote=RECON]It's funny how it says young swingers party for those under 45. Such a percentage of the peeps who RSVP'd are over that, or are lying. [/quote]
They are wanting to creep up on the attractive 20's and 30's olds. [/quote]
Well they ARE pretty easy to creep up on. Most of them have their noses buried in their phones 24/7.
[img]http://sd.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk/i/be-very-calm-because-i-m-creeping-up-behind-you.png[/img] [/quote]
Welcome to modern society
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