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B_k_lovers - Getting over first-time jitters - ^^Most definitely
Honestly, a large part of the lifestyle (in our experience) is figuring out what you want and how to communicate that with other couples. Personally, I would not just strip unless I'm sure all 4+ people are on the same page.
They did a few seminars on this topic at Young Swingers Week in Jamaica last week. There were some good pointers there, such as using body language/touch (shoulder is casual, elbow is more interested, small of back is intimate) and gauging reactions. Or giving the other couple plenty of chances to say "yes" either through word or action by opening up opportunities to do so.
One of the things that we like to do as a couple is invite another couple (or single friend, or small group) over to play naughty board games. Turns out you can turn any game into a strip game if you're creative enough, and that's a good way to allow people to ease into whatever their comfort level is. Every gets as naked as they feel is comfortable, then you can start swapping "favors" or "truth or dare" style challenges or whatever instead of stripping once you're as naked as you want to be.
Help us out.. Take this Survey - For Utah Swingers - Done. Would like to see the final tally.
Swingers Party - Doesnt mean who ever is there is open to everyone elsa - you should not avoid the clubs but the idiots there instead.we went to halloween party and an idiot grabbed my wife's ass i told him if he did it again i would throw him off the stairs and we were down stairs.having gotten his attention i then explained proper etiquette at a swing club some people just think that every one is there for their enjoyment because they paid to get in
Phil
Discretion a Must?!? - Let us know -
We have been noticed. My wife goes to one of those offices where there are 4-5 doctors that work there. One of them noticed my wife's pics on an adult site. (because he had an ad there as well) No issues came of it, but that has been the only time anyone did "Hey I saw your pic".
We are discreet, but on the same hand feel that anyone that sees our pic is because they were in the website too. We try not to make any enemies of other swingers and so we have not had anyone out to get us by sending our profile to other non-swingers.
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - I don't think anyone is saying you should give single guys a try. No matter whether you motivations are insecurity, racism or just plain not turned on by it, you shouldn't feel pressured into something you're not into. However, it's not cool to come into a thread that's directed to those that are interested in them and spread intolerant messages about them, because you don't like them. In other words, it was an AB conversation C your way out. LOL!
I don't mean that directly to you AKLIM. I mean that to anyone that would make it their mission to spread intolerance of a group out of sheer spite. That kind of shit should no exist in our community. No one is asking anyone to do something they're not willing to do, but on the same token, don't get on a soap box and spread hatred of anyone, just because you don't agree.
If a single guy is at a party and you pack up and leave because you've got this preconceived notion that all single males are pigs and are just waiting for you to take a piss, so they can approach your wife, while you're away... I say this... 1) So what? Is your wife not capable of handling herself? 2) Are you not capable of saying, "Hey, Sorry man, we're not into single guys." I see that as no different that taking care of a couple you're not interested in. Quite frankly, there are far more asshole, disrespectful men in couples that we've encountered, then the single variety.
I know of a very respectful single male in the West Valley area that was a total gentleman and opens his home to couples so that they have a haven to party naked! lol.
-D-
Sex vs. Guilt - Atheists have 'better sex lives than followers of religion who are plagued with guilt' - I hope the Admin doesn't mind this. If so, delete it. I found this interesting; a swingers site in Utah for Mormons.
http://www.sdc.com/utah-swingers/church-of-jesus-christ_lds-swingers-utah.html
Mr. Seperimentors
The males of couples I need your help!! - I am trying to understand my husband and male pride.But been that I am not a male this is hard.So please help. - being in the life style u will meet alot of people that are looking for different things in different ways . most have some kinda of rules . but there is a few wives that can play on their own without the hubby around . but please remeber that most couples do it with each other cause they enjoy watching each other enjoy themselves with another person .
the life style is for people to explore thier fantasies . the couples are very open and honest about what they want and dont want and they want to meet people who are looking for what they are look ing for . the more rules u have the harder it will be to find the friends you are looking for . dont ever do anything u dont want to do . or make your hubby do something he isnt ready for . it willonly back fire . but i think it would be helpful if u pampered your husband a bit . to let him know u love him . and u are happy with what he has to offer you . him not wantitng another man around at all shows some jealous issues . and it might be a good idea to talk about that . even if u are only wanting to be with women u still should talk about any kinda of problems like that . him being young he is new to this stuff and might not understand how swingers see and think and feel about this kinda of stuff . swingers are very open and treat sex and the body different then normal straight people . ill give u an ex. if he takes u to a reg bar iam sure he has to fight off the other guys that are trying tomake their move on you . the other guys are normally rude and pushy and all of that . at swingers parties they are not like that . its more of a loving and shareing way . they arent trying to put the moves on you in a disrespectful way at all .
the best thing i can think of since u dont want any guy around is to put your profile up on all the girl sites looking for other girls . you will find alot more ladies looking for what u are looking for thier then on swingers sites . cause ill tell u they are hard to find on swingers sites . but then what u are looking for is girl on girl and then u will run into the problem of your man wanting to be there . just like he doesnt want other men around . alot of the ladies looking for other ladies dont want men around . so the same thing that your hubby is not wanting from couples . guess what yall are a couple . and alot of single ladies only looking for other ladies is going to see yall as a couple and are going to have aproblem with your hubby wanting to be there . like i said the more rules u have the harder it is to find what u want .
i am in no way telling u to change your rules or anything like that . so please dont take what i am saying the wrong way . u will find what u want . but it will just take longer and u will have less picking to choose from . what been u find the ones u are looking for it will be worth the wait .
i really liked the idea that someone said , it was to find a couple that has been in the life style for a while and let them help yall meet new people . at the club we go to they have couples that greet and help newbies find some friends. and just because u arent looking to play with couples doesnt mean u can t meet new people and hang out and go to parties with couples .
we love meeting new friends . and we love to invite people to the club and hang out with them . and help them meet new friends . once u meet new friends u will feel better and more relaxed . when u go to clubs u just tell the people what u are looking for and if they arent it then so be it . no harm done . i really think u should talk to your husband about why he feels so strong about the other guys not being around . cause that will cause problems being in the life style . dont be judemental towards what he says but listen to him really good . and i think if he was friends with other guys in the life style that might help him feel more relaxed . but if nto then please dont push him . its not worth it .
i have always been into ladies and not men . it is so hard finding single ladies that we both can click with . so we found it easier to find a couple that was looking for what we are looking for . i dont mind light touching and stuff like that . but i am not looking to play with another hubby . so we make sure its ok that way . only girl on girl and then each finsihs with their own mate . . well i gave u every idea that i can think of to help yall . so good luck . and have fun .
naughty dreams
freaky kitty
KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - This is also my first comment on this site. Normally I keep to myself but I have to speak about this. I am a divorcee and now me and my lovely, amazing, sexy, new partner are living happily together and we are swingers. She was in the lifestyle before and I was a little bit before also. Me and my ex were not on any site and didn't do it regularly but I think three times we had done something with other couples. In my case our marriage was in a downward spiral and it was not because of the swinging. It was not going to work no matter what. Of course she would bring up the event during an argument but there were many other issues that's caused more serious problems.
I watched the link and from what I gather this gal is not that attractive ( at least to me ) and she has a sour taste in her mouth about swingers ( no pun intended ) because they did not have good experiences in the lifestyle. So I put the blame on them for this , not swinging or swingers. We have had some wonderful times and have meant some great friends doing this.
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - I am with Kristy on this one Its presumptuous Its also shoehorning you into only those couples that love big black dick lol
so all the couples who may like dick but dont care what color it is Well you get my point. may take offense to your screen-name..
There could be other reasons but All in all single males are often not looked highly upon unless they have built a reputation and worked several years to make this reputation among the lifestyle.
Hey - - Okay...the lack of compassion and depravity that others have never ceases to amaze me. Not five minutes after posting my reply...here is the private email I got from "someone" who had previously posted on this thread...a.k.a. UTCPL...
Thought,
You should get on a plane and go fuck this poor sap. In case you have not realized it yet this is a swingers sight not Dr. Phil's show.
Maybe one or the both of you are the ones that need a good ass-fucking. It just might loosen up that tight sphincter you apparently have!
Your true character is really shining at at it's best this weekend UTCPL. Any more methods you might employ to make proverbial asses out of yourselves?
Maybe I need to get some popcorn and kick back to watch the ensuing show, eh?
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