Finley Swingers in California

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Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - Thank you so much for your insight and advice ABCCOUPLE. I truly appreciate it and I will definitely be reading The Ethical Slut. I think that all four of us are very lucky and have the exact kind of connection that it takes to have a wonderful Poly relationship. The other wife and I are both Bi and our husbands are close friends as well. The wife and I fell for each other early on and we both have developed love for each others' husbands and they for us. Thanks again for your thought provoking post.

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - I (he) owned a '75 Gremlin X. Black with Gold stripes. 304 V8 and 3-speed manual transmission. One of the best cars I ever owned.

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Posted By: XXXTASYX2 Reply posted on: Jan 8, 2008 - 2:00 pm I guess that means if we were hanging out with you, you would be ok with us talking shit about Rednecks. Are you going to be a "one trick pony" then? To us, if all you have are "Dumb Nigger" jokes or "Dumb Pollock" or "Dumb Chink" etc, etc, it gets boring. Now, if you are like Gunnery Sergeant Hartman who said: There is no racial bigotry here. I do not look down on niggers, kikes, wops or greasers. Here you are all equally worthless.", I don't think we have a problem.

Thank you Lifestyle. - A commentary about our journey - Thanksgiving just passed us by and Xmas and the New Year are quickly approaching. I thought I would take a long moment of my time, and your time if you are reading this, to tell this massive entity, called the "Lifestyle" how it has changed me this year. We have been in the Lifestyle for a little over a year and a half. We don't even like the name lifestyle. We prefer "kinky" or "adventurous" or even just "fun as hell", but it seems the term will be around for awhile longer. The wife and I often ponder what exactly the Lifestyle is. Is it a certain set of rules and guidelines that we all live in? Is it the same for us as it is for everyone else? How often does it hurt marriage or relationships and how often does it help? Do we regret our decision to enter into it? When we first tip-toed into the waters we were intimidated, in awe and totally unprepared for what we would experience. It all seemed magical and sometimes scary. We have and had a great marriage and thought we wanted a new, kinky adventure together. We planned to go slow and we would be fine, we were certain. But we were nervous. We were so sloshed at our first Sinful party that we irritated a few people there, no doubt, and probably made asses of ourselves. We still do that sometimes, but now we do it conscientiously. But we grew and learned quickly and have morphed into what we are today (huge asses). Interestingly enough, a few years before we entered the LS, we thought swingers were all gross, dirty, sexually infected people ( I am still not ruling some of you out). We had met a couple that harassed us at every opportunity and were the "creepy" type. Now we know people may think of us the same way if they found out, which is sad, because we like to be honest and open with all of our friends. So, like many of you, it is a secret we keep. It is a trade off for doing what we do. So what have I learned? How have I changed? I have always been a non-judgmental person by most standards, but still I had strong opinions about certain things. One spouse, one partner; that is how it should be done. So what changed? First off, our communication started to blossom about all sorts of things once my wife left her religion. I won't mention names, but it begins with an L and ends in DS. We talked and talked and talked and the more we talked the more we realized that we both had kinky minds and that maybe we should "experiment". So, we made some rules, actually a LOT of rules, and entered the ring. Still thinking one spouse, one partner, but maybe, just maybe we could play in the same room as other people. How kinky is that? Hence our name...sameroomonly. Well, as some of you know, the lifestyle is a monstrous, living, breathing beast and can quickly drag you to places you never thought possible. We made some mistakes, had some great times and just fumbled our way through for a few months trying to figure out where our lines were and what we should or shouldn't do. Then we got smart. We learned to communicate again, like we used to do privately, only now we could do it with other people around. And it was refreshing. No more secret code words (well, sometimes) and no more wondering if what one of us was doing was not condoned by the other. So that is the first thing I think the LS has helped us with. Communication. We communicate like mother fuckers. Better than all of our non-lifestyle friends, for the most part. Are we always amazing and never have bumps? Of course not. Anyone who says they never have drama are either liars or delusional. So thank you lifestyle for our ability to exchange ideas and to be more honest with each other, always. The next thing we found was that we were making friends at a very fast pace. We made a kik group and had our first party with about 40 people up in Park City only 5 or so months after joining the website. It was a blast. We still host parties and invite new people all the time. We enjoy introducing new friends with old friends. Wait, did I say friends or fuck buddies? Don't we sleep with all of our friends? Isn't that the expectation? Not for us. We have made friends that we know will be around until we are all old and gray. We have lost friends because we wouldn't fuck. There are whole discussions on these forums about how some just want to meet and fuck, because this is a swinging site, not a friend site. And to each their own. We don't judge, but for us the rewards of our friendships have far outweighed the 10 or 20 seconds of amazing sex. We have friends around the world that we never would have met without the LS. So to the lifestyle, I say thank you for all of the wonderful friends we have made. Love you all, some more than others ( you know who I am talking about). :) The LS has also taught me to be less judgmental and to avoid using words like "never" or "always". Life is full of gray areas and has lost much of its black and white features. Oh sure, I still judge, have preferences and prejudices, but we all do. I just really believe in walking in another's shoes before I make any decisions about someone's life. So lifestyle, thank you for making me more understanding of other people. Last of all, I just want to say that the sexual journey has been amazing. We have shared many hot, sexy and intimate times with some of you and we have come to realize how similar we all are. We all like sex, we all have a kinky side, or else we wouldn't be here. I have done things that I never imagined would ever happen, with some of the sexiest, most beautiful people I have ever met. I have shared intimate moments with people I care deeply about and others that were just passing through. All have their high points. I have experienced more than most people would even dream about, as have most of you. We are the select who choose to follow our dreams and fantasies. I think we are fortunate. So lifestyle, thank you for all the amazing sex. In the end the lifestyle is different for everyone. It is a whole sub universe in the middle of a "normal" society. Sometimes we have to walk among the shadows to keep our secret, but totally worth it. I would never trade the LS for my wonderful marriage and think I am the luckiest man alive to be married to my beautiful, amazing wife who has shared this journey with me. Love you, Babe. As with everything in life, there will be people who read this and like it, some who don't care and some who disagree or will want to pick it to pieces. That is what makes this amazing. There are so many wonderful, different people and the lifestyle is a perfect diving board to jump into the sea of waiting bodies and personalities. So if you are new, jump in, explore and learn. If you are old school, help others to weather the bumps and keep exploring. Long live the lifestyle. That is a little about my journey, how about you? I encourage anyone to add what they think or feel the LS has done for them, even negative things. Merry xmas to everyone and hope to meet some of you new people. And to my friends, I care about each and every one of you. The Mr.

Swingers Next Door! - ABC news story on Swinging! - I caught the second half of this show while staying in a hotel a few nights ago. It seemed like kind of a hatchet job on people who enjoy the lifestyle. There was a lot of negative social representation. It was not what I was hoping for.

Amusing - Fakes.. ugh.. DESPISE THEM! - Maybe it is a testament to how much time I spend on these sites but I find this kind of thing frequently. Often a couple on one site is a single guy on another. Sometimes even on the same site under a different account. Want to know why this happens? Look at the following: Posted By: ADMINISTRATOR Reply posted on: Apr 27, 2006 - 5:38 pm I don't understand how they think they can get away with it. They don't think at least ONE person is going to recognize the pictures? Come on now!!! We're taking care of this immediately. In this case, the admin replied they would address this "immediately" yet a week later the account is still active with the same pics. Without real action on the admin's part, there is little to dissuade these clowns. Add to this those idiots who post as a couple but turn out to be either cheating marrieds or just single losers. We have traveled as much as 1500 miles each way to meet a couple and discovered there was either no wife at all or one who was unaware of the husband's activities. There is also my favorite, married guys posting as a couple and then leaving all the wife's info blank. It seems there is just about no way for honest swingers to find someone to have a good time with. The web is just full of posers and liars who apparently cannot get a date or make a buck without posting a fake profile on a lifestyle site. Remember to always be careful out there. It really is a jungle and there are plenty of nuts in those trees! Intimateduo

Married people lying to their spouses... - - Swingers rule, cheaters drool! [em]Emo_84[/em] You REALLY have to fend of that many closeted bi guys "each week", Torque? That's..........................weird. Been doing this almost 30 years and I can count on one finger how many times I've been hit on by closeted bi males. Are you sure you aren't misreading the signs/signals? Or are they actually outright telling you they want to fuck you (or vice versa?) I'm not into dudes at all but the double standard in the lifestyle about bi-sexuality is pretty fucked up. [em]Emo_67[/em]

Too Young to be Taken Seriously? - - My husband and I are interesting in joining the lifestyle, starting slow. However I've noticed the majority of people here are older. We both are twenty, is this too young to be taken seriously in the lifestyle? Should we keep at it, or come back in 10-20 years. I do understand if people want their partners to be old enough to have an adult beverage with them. But perhaps it is the maturity level? Maturity level is different for everyone. There are twenty year olds who act years older than they are, and sixty year olds who act younger than we are. To each their own I guess. I'm not asking to have everyone be my friend right now. I'm just curious as to what people think about younger swingers. What is your opinion about say twenty-five or younger couples?

Sexy swingers closer to our age - 20-30 year old sexy swingers - WE are 42m 39f, always open to talking to attractive couples around our age!

Anyone else in or near Daybreak? - We know you are out there! - [quote=PLAYNW3]What ever came of the Daybreak swingers Facebook page? Is it active and being used?[/quote] pretty slow. a couple people talk and post pics. most people just lurk. We need more people. Could be a great group