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how do i get my girlfriend into lifestyle? - - I assume you two watch XXX porn. Does any porn with multi partners, gal/gal seem to make her more juicy or hot after? this might be a clue. Also dont forget to tell her that this is not some line you just one day have to decide to jump over and it means you have sex with others. TO us it just meant stopping to say hey! What is wrong with nudity? What is wrong seeing others having sex or being seen? This is all normal and a big part of our lives. Why is it so taboo?
Perhaps all she would consider is nudity. Near the start of our adventure we choose to go to desires resort a "clothing optional" beach place South of Cancun. IT does have some 30% on average swingers. But a swinger means many different levels. There you have no pressure and lots of fun even if you choose to wear clothes but it is easy in an atmosphere like that 2k miles from home to let at least some of the clothes come off and see how that feels.. Then seeing all the sexy folks going to dinner dressed up from body paint to stuff you think of as night wear is really a turn on. When she enjoys the mind blowing sex back in the privacy of your room she will either get the interest or not. But first I would think you need to just man up and be able to talk about stuff or this gal is not for you!
Booty Call BS - Let's get real people - [quote=KRAZYGIRL]Well that would take a flight number and a seat location please, dont tease me with just a promise of mile high club, well ok you can but still need my seat number[/quote]
There is an idea.....Swingers flights......Call it the mile high memories club. Coffee tea and me!
Just a little friendly advise to most single male swingers. - Male swingers - Single Swinging Males: Staying Thirsty My Friends
from one swinger to another:
This article will definitely not apply to all single males, but if you do take offense to this then you are the rude, pushy, insensitive single male that has no clue that swinging is good adult fun and not your personal way getting access to
Cache Valley and Surrounding areas swinger group - - Well kik is just a messaging app that works a lot like text but you can make groups of up to 50 people so it’s great for swingers as you can have big groups and don’t need to give out phone numbers ect.
When you get it let us know.
Going a new direction! - Let's get some testimonials. - As a single male I can say that Swinguler is the ONLY swingers website that has treated me with respect and I have never gotten negative responses from members.
Playing with \"swingers\" vs \"nonswingers\" - - Okay this probably doesnt make alot of sense, but here goes.
We went to the bar the other night and met some new folks, regular guys that aren\'t in the lifestyle- that is they are just regular single young guys. I love to flirt so I had picked out a particular nice guy and we were playing pool etc. Well I happened to mention that hubby and I were swingers etc....
Now my question is, do you only play with someone else who\'s into the lifestyle? This guy really wanted to get in on some action with me and now thinking about it, I just feel nervous. It has brought back old anxieties about when I was single and all the single assholes out there that were looking to just get laid and kick you to the curb. At least in this lifestyle, you get to know people and there is a certain kind of understanding about sex and you usually know that the person you will be fucking cares about you in some respect.
I am trying to make a decision about whether to let this guy in or not for some play. I just can\'t decide how I feel about it.
Any input would be appreciated!!!
XOXOXO
Jen
5 Guys - Who knew?.? - Lol why are all the sexy swingers in Utah? Teehee
Poky - - There is a swingers party at the Ramada Inn tonight...I have to work otherwise I'd be there; It should be fun.
Dating other Couples - Have you done it? - Been there, done that, have the t-shirt. We know plenty of people who've done it, and done it successfully (up to a point), ourselves included. We don't know of many, if any, where it has lasted for more than a few years and didn't end somewhat badly.
It CAN be quite heady and has the potential to take swinging to the next level. Unfortunately, it is also exponentially more likely to crank up the drama factor to eleven (out of ten).
Quite often each couple has their own "agenda" (for lack of a better term) that is often at odds with the other couple's agenda. We've seen it frequently cause weird jealousies not only between primary partners but also between non-primary partners and in a few extreme notable cases it has ended marriages.
In our case, we were relatively long-term swingers at that point who, although never really super active in the scene, felt like we'd checked off most of the things on our swinging bucket list and were somewhat curious if there was more out there to explore in swingerdom...or if we were sort of done with the scene.
The couple we started "dating" wasn't really the kind of couple we usually were attracted to and maybe that was part of the allure. They also had a very interesting (to say the least) dynamic in their marriage that really was at odds with that in our relationship. Ultimately they kept pushing boundaries (started throwing the "L" word around and much more), pushed for more and more separate activities and were insidious in slowly and subtly causing rifts, both large and small, as well as a LOT of drama. We actually didn't even realize how much drama and subterfuge had occurred until we were finally out of the situation entirely.
We actually miss them a little, at times, and often wonder if there might have been a way to talk things out and come to a better understanding of how to continue on in a healthier way but they've actually gone on to do exactly the same thing to a number of other couples we know (it's a small world in Utah swinging and word gets around) and it seems to be their pattern.
Tldr; It can work. It's quite rare when it works long term. It has the potential for disaster. While it's appealing in many ways we don't really recommend it. YMMV
Playing Alone - - Couples all have different rules. Many categorically refuse to play alone with ANYONE ever. This is their "security" place. They feel comfortable in the place where they can see each other and "protect" if necessary. It takes some people a long time to get passed this.
It's kind of a 'control' thing leftover from the vanilla life. I'm not saying it's bad, good or indifferent it's just the way it is. Some people take longer to get passed their histories as vanillas than others. As they progress and get more comfortable with themselves, the lifestyle, their partners then they will slowly open up and begin to trust a bit more.
Don't take it personally, that's the key. Many people still hang on to their vanilla background that their partners are their most 'valued' possession. I liken it to my $450 deep sea fishing reel. Sure I'll loan it to someone to use if I'm on the boat with them and can make sure they're taking care of it. Is there anyone I'd just let 'borrow' it out right for the day or weekend? Not a chance in hell.
It takes time to let go of that 'she's/he's mine' get feeling. I think my wife and I took almost 6 years before we got there successfully. We tried many times before that but it never worked out well for either of us. We finally came to a point where it's okay to play separately everything from next room to next state it no longer bothers us. I personally prefer within 30 - 50 miles so she get's home faster for the "after play" sex you're describing (which I really like too.)
You'll have to find a VERY secure, VERY established, VERY strong couple to fulfill your fantasy. They are out there, my wife and I for example but even though we're open to playing separately are we open to YOU playing with her or me separately? That's a different level of trust. Does it mean no? No. It means "maybe" in time it's a possibility. (I'm speaking hypothetically of course.)
Don't worry your "couple" or "person" will come along. You might also try investigating a subsection of the lifestyle called "hotwifeing" while I know few swingers who are hardcore into only hotwifing, there are quite a few that tip toe in that part of the lifestyle (quick def, she plays he doesn't except with her.) That's the post play joy for you and the play and post play joy for her. Most people just bounce between that and swinging. There are people out there just be patient and don't expect it from any current playmates that you have established rules with, they need to progress at their own speed.
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