Enumclaw Swingers in Washington

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This is F**ked Up! - You might want to Lock up your Self Made Swinger Sex Tapes after this! - [url=http://www.slate.com/id/2269153?wpisrc=obinsite]Swinger Artricle[/url] Bob & Carol & Ted & Malice My parents' swinger friends are trying to blackmail our family after Mom and Dad's tragic deaths. When my brother and I were children, our parents were friends with another married couple, "Bob" and "Helen." Bob and Helen were frequent guests, and the two couples often traveled together. In my early teens, my family moved across the country, and Bob and Helen disappeared from our lives. Years passed. Last month, my parents were killed in a car accident. At the funeral, I was approached by an older couple who identified themselves as Bob and Helen. They asked if my brother and I would have dinner with them before they left. At the end of the meal, Helen revealed that she and Bob were swingers, and my parents had been their partners! She went on to say they'd had a falling out, and my parents had moved us across the country and cut off contact. She said they felt very parental toward us and wanted to be involved in our lives. My brother and I babbled something and fled. They contacted me a few days later, and I politely told them neither one of us wants further contact. Bob got very hateful and said that my parents had filmed several "sessions" of the four of them, and if my brother and I didn't turn over the footage, we'd regret it. Bob has since been hounding my brother and me by phone and mail, threatening to let anyone who will listen know of our parents' history with them unless we comply. Is this a matter for the police, or would they laugh us out the door? The prospect of cleaning out my parents' home has gotten even bleaker, as I fear what every old VHS tape may hold. Then there's the larger issue, which is trying to fathom how my parents lived this life for so many years. Help, please!

Christain Swingers? - - WOW CODA Always room for open minded discussion but that was pretty harsh comparison. I was on Church Council, the Catholic School board (as president for several years), the Catholic Youth Organization, a room dad (that goodness for a great employer), and rarely if ever missed a field trip. So YES, they can mix and YES I think a fellow board member and her husband were also swingers. We had gone to church for years with swinger friends and 1/3 of the people at the First Communion of their youngest child were swingers. NOT MILDLY suggesting that our way was the only way but it CAN work. GREAT Topic

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - We think the problem is that people see the equation "sex = love". IOW, if I have sex with you, I must love you. Therefore polyamory and swinging are the same. After all, if I don't love you, I won't be having sex with you. The way I see it, swinging is like a game of golf or tennis. I might play a game with you but I don't love you. Similarly, I might have sex with you but I don't love you. Poly, IMO, is basically having a relationship with that other person and sex is involved on some level. Kinda like "I'm in love with you and oh, BTW, lets make love" The way we see it, swinging is about exchanging sexual partners for recreation sex. In an orgy situation at a party, you can have sex with that person with zero words exchanged. In a poly relationship, there is a real connection going on besides just sex. Sex becomes incidental just like it is with married couples. With swinging, there is no emotional attachment. Is that a good thing? Well, it depends. We need to understand the very simple nature of things. We do this to avoid that. That is human nature. Many swingers DON'T want emotional attachments and avoid them because of the complications they cause in the first one. Are there benefits to the attachments? You bet. Is there a price to pay for that benefit? But of course. Is it worth it to you? That depends on your viewpoint. In our life as a couple, the problems poly cause BASED ON OUR OPINION (your's may vary and no right and wrong here) do not outweigh the payoff. IOW, we don't think the benefits of a poly relationship are worth the problems it creates based on our opinion. YMMV

KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - Gasp! Tens of thousands of swingers here in Utah. I believe Utah now has a slightly higher-than-average divorce rate. The national divorce rate is 3.4% with Utah slightly higher at 3.6%. The percent of divorced residents in Utah is reported as 9.3% which is the 18th lowest in the nation. Don't ask me how those numbers reconcile. It has something to do with immigration into the state I am guessing. New Jersey reports that 8.5% of it's residents are divorced and that is the lowest in the nation. Well what do you think? Did more than 3.6% of all the swinger couples, that you have met end up getting a divorce? Was it over swinging? Are more than 9.3% of the swingers population divorced? This would include all the singles now swinging that were once married. One woman telling the media how swinging ended her marriage is anecdotal at best. Do I believe she is telling the truth? Yes I do. Do I personally believe swinging ads an extra element of jeopardy to a marriage? Yes I do. Do I believe there are quite a few people that would be happier staying away from the swinging lifestyle? Yes I do. Never-the-less, most of the couples, we have personally met, that are swingers seem to enjoy swinging and frankly enjoy doing it together. Do I believe there are quite a few couples who will enjoy swinging? Yes I do, we certainly have enjoyed the lifestyle experience as do a lot of swinging couples we have met. In the end if you are a married couple you have to make the decision based on the two of you, as to whether or not swinging is a good thing in your lives individually and as a couple. As for statistical models as to the divorce rate within the community of swingers well there aren't any. This isn't really a news story it's sensationalist journalism designed to attract viewers. Anyway, the divorce rate has been going down since the 1980s and swinging has been on the rise since the 1980s so you could make an analogy that swinging is saving marriage. Yes it would be a bunch of anecdotal bull shit just like this story.

real members? - - I think you need to grow a new sense about people. Do you feel confortable with them over the net before you do anything. Do they seem to be real.. Can they spell simple words, is their grammer adult, how do they phrase things. Many times one can ascertain quite a lot by how and what someone says. Then we have kind of an unwritten rules: 1. Talk with people via the medium .. IM... the site we're on email and give no personal info until you feel that the people are at least stable. 2. Don't meet people or find people over an hour or so driving time 3 Meet very informally... We've found that a mall with a food court is a great place to meet. If the other couple fail to show take the misses shopping... 4. Once you meet you can exchange phone numbers or addresses as you feel comfortable doing. Maybe after the informal meeting meet at a local swingers club or dinner or bowling...what ever works to make sure they are a good match....and trustworthy. 5. The fun is open and go for the gold... As for certifying couples... what does it mean other than there are really 2 people on the other end of that computer unless it is done by your peers who have met and or played with you. Certification is about as valued as is the pictures on a web-site. They could be the people or maybe they aren't who they say they are... Ray

LS vacation - looking for suggestions - We posted this the other day in another forum but thought it might help you out... If you ever get a chance to do the Young Swingers Week at Hedo (especially in March) do it! In March they take over the entire resort and limit the guests in age and only couples...no single dudes. One member of the couple has to be 45 or under. The people that go are amazing! We made friends all over the US and Canada and have places to stay if we are travelling. Just spent Halloween in Denver with a couple we met at YSW at Hedo. They have theme nights every night, play rooms, top shelf alcohol, good (not great) food, day time activities (including free daily scuba trips if you are certified), four or five on resort restaurants (as well as the buffet), no tipping allowed and a lot more. We like spending our days layng on the beach or partying in the nude pool where you have hundreds of fully naked people around you all the time. The resort has a mandatory nude side and a clothing optional side. The resort is designed for swingers instead of just being lifestyle friendly especially when YSW takes over. It is truly an amazing experience that we highly recommend trying at least once...and once you have been, you will go back. We can not recommend it outside of YSW weeks because we have heard there can be lurking single men.

A paradigm shift - polyamory - Your thoughts? Here are mine... - This is a big big topic... good one. It is true to say that an amazing thing about being human (thank any God figure you'de like :)) is that we have an INFINITE capacity to love. It is most obvious in women but exists in us all. I understand all of the comments about walking a path together, finding the one and only, etc and that is a great way to live but the fact is, we can love more than we do. We can choose to want to be with a certain person more than any other but we can love many. The easiest way to show this is that when a child is born they make the parents feel as if they could never love like they do this first beautiful child but when others come along what we experience is an expansion of our capacity to love. It is limitless. As mothers and parents can love many children so can we all love many others. We dont need to, some dont want to, but some feel it is a natural and Godly way to live. The biggest obstacle to it is jealousy or feelings of ownership which Swingers have largely learned are "lower thinking" attributes and, at least as far as the physical goes, they are beyond jealousy etc (of course I mean the healthy ones). Big Love is a real deal. It scares many people, even swingers but it is the next and logical progression in the more enlightened thinkers out there, which many swingers are. We swingers have at least tackled the threat that comes from "physical" sharing but many are scared to death to hear their loving sharing spouse express feelings of love for another man or woman. A great book on this topic is "The Future of Love" by Daphne Rose Kingma. It's excellent. Im sure this idea (polyamory) is not for everybody but it is natural and can be as rewarding and freeing as swinging is I'm told...(Jealousy, guilt and ownership are unnatural 'learned' behaviors). I already know I cant be 'everything' to my loving partner but am I strong enough to allow her "love" someong else? Oh wait... is that really my decision? Thats my 2 cents... Dave

sh*t swingers say - to preach to the choir - This is brilliant and totally hilarious!!!!! LOVE IT! LMAO!

Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - Sounds amazing!

Nightclubs - - Area 51 is great! So is Hukka bar and grill. Not many swingers there, but it is really fun. Their rules are more lax, so it's easy to catch a quick kiss or fondle. I have not been to Habits yet, but I hear it's a great place!