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Preconceived Ideas - - It's been a long time, but I'm not sure that I had any preconceived ideas. I'm poly and responsibile non-monogamy was nothing new to me. On the other side of this relationship B knew I was Poly and she didn't quite understand it but trusted me. She was "curious" that is to say if she saw FF play in a flic she got so gushing wet.. but because of her catholic upbringing, she couldn't be Bi....that's a sin.....??.... Well we went to a party and luckily a couple and staff members sat down and talked to her and she watched people and talked to others and found out they were not pervs. Nurses and medical personel are probably the largest group in swinging. Cops, (police for the people who don't like the other term) truck drivers, mechnics, architects, contractors, engineers etc... So a good cross section of the general populaion are represented.. When she found this out...she embrassed the lifestyle and she loves to dance and... let her libido run. She was no longer curious after a couple of parties.... So she can get nude do whatever she wishes and even have orgasms on the dance floor dancin with herself.... WOW... So her preconceived ideas was that swingers were pervs... Oh...and I guess we are... By the vanilla world.....Give em time... pretty soon maybe everyone will cum over to the lifestyle,,lol
Taking one for the team - Yay or nay - Here Here DARKNLADYJEDI Aka Barbi :p
but yeah alot of swingers on here are becoming so picky about the physical they forget all about the sexual side.
Its a fuck just like gettin drunk and pickin up a pratical stranger in a bar pratically.
wife with other men - ahhhrrrggghhh - If you are going to be swingers the first thing you need to do is set boundaries for each other, if you are worried she is going to something you may not agree with sit down first and talk about what is ok and what is not!!! You can both enjoy this life style and not have to worry about jealously for example only play together. Go to parties, have another couple over or go to there place, etc. If that would be easier for you then you both are there and both in the fun. To be in this lifestyle you MUST TRUST YOUR SPOUSE!! you can't look at this as cheating because you are both committed to each other you are just sharing you sexual lives with other to fulfill a need no one in this lifestyle is looking for a new life long love just friends and fun. Make sure you talk to each other and express why you are worried set limits you both are comfortable with!!!!! If you don't think you can over come being jealous this life style is not for you!!!
Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? - "Well regardless of what some folks say, age is a determining factor, especially when you reach the, "remind me of my dad" attitude, or even "you could be my grandfather""
So, what advice would hand those that are told they remind other couples of their kids?
Youth seems to be as much of a stumbling block from what I have observed as agedness.
Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - Aquarius - yes that is exactly what I say... "Have more time? I just thought of a new position" :h . We also tend to cuddle after and bask in the glow. Gives us a moment to come up with something new to try. LOL
Swingers of Color - - We're here too AND sent you an email awhile back...never got a response from you...Oh well...So maybe you just arent looking?
Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - I have been ask to perticipate in both ,yes it has ben with close friends it was wonderfull ,hope you find the right cpland in time youn will good luck. J.P
Yahoo name and status - - Most the swingers we have meet use yahoo to talk and such quite regularly. COnsidering the chat room here is empty and the instant messenger isnt that great. ANy way in the profiles we could have a spot for thier yahoo anmd if the are on your frined list and maybe even a small little status icon for when they are online.
Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Dress code for unspoken
Single Males - - [quote=EVILDOERS]
...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote]
Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopterâ€. Call me old-fashioned.
[quote=EVILDOERS]
I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote]
Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait.
I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to.
[quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote]
This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging.
[quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote]
If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did†chestnut.
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