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Bitchfest here...... - - Having been in this lifestyle for quite some time, I've seen more than my share of drama. I think the most common misconception is that everyone is on the same mindset.
This is not the case for most. You would think that going to a meet and greet set up on a Swinger's site would be a license to "Act" like swingers to anyone you recognize from the site in a public setting. However, I've learned quickly that because everyone responds differently, it is best to assume nothing and take nothing for granted and put on your thickest skin and expect drama. If nothing happens, and you make a connection with some one or both, then build from there and have fun. I have more fun when I go with no expectations and have them wildly exceeded, than to go full on and have the evening ruined through taking drama filled responses personal.
However, I don't think that because some people may have jealousies, that they have the right to treat people rudely. I think there are many who can work on this a bit more and realize that we are all in this to have some fun.
Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - We just really do couple to couple time according to schedules, Tiffs parties when we can ;) there's plenty of people to meet, and haven't planned our full moon summer party yet..lol
If only you could tell in public who is and isnt in the LS - - [quote=fourplay][quote=DARINTRICIA]There are phone apps that can show when others are nearby. I use one for hunting with the people I hunt with. So someone just needs to develop an app.[/quote]
Super good idea![/quote]
Several apps like that HAVE been developed. One was actually offered to members of another swing site we're on. It failed miserably because people wouldn't, for various reasons, use it. We never used it personally. Some people apparently thought the potential for being outed as swingers was too great to risk using it. Another app was written by a friend of ours and it supposedly had some safeguards in it that he had designed but Apple wouldn't allow it in their app store...I guess because it's purpose was to help people swap spouses. \_(ツ)_/¯
Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - [quote=BENT]SUMINDYFUN: To attempt to better answer your question, this is what we've experienced/learned in our poly-type relationships...
This is so much more of a complex subject than just a quick "blurb", we like to compare it to guessing a 4 combination lock, you know at least 1 or 2 of the correct numbers... but do you really??? You find out an amazing amount about YOURSELF through this process!
We have seen just about everything emerge, from complete unbelievable bliss to complete unbelievable hurt. However, what we've learned is TOTAL honesty, trust, respect, patience and absolute untethered communication are key! These things can either make or break it and breaking it earlier rather than later is a good thing, because if it breaks later then it usually means one or more people missed one or more of the fore-mentioned items and will cause much greater hurt because of all the time/work that was put in by the others.
BTW, apparently the bliss is much more powerful than the hurt because we keep trying and trying for some reason? Yep, its like a drug and we're addicted! This is why we dont fault any one for not wanting to "step through that door" so to speak. We suggest to any one that they open that door very, very slowly and even walk away for a bit before entering fully.
ABCMAN: You hit the nail directly on the head... from our experiences, social conditioning is extremely difficult for most people to overcome.[/quote]
Thank you BENT! We agree with you 100% on the honesty and communication aspect. We have been so happy in the year we have been with our couple, but there have been some bumps and mis communications along the way. Fortunately we were able to deal with them and learn from them rather well. We realize that a Poly relationship is very complex and risky, but the rewards outweigh the risks for us. Wishing you guys good luck in your search!
Christain Swingers? - - We are both of the mind that being a christian, or following any organized religeon, usually means that you would try to live your life to the best of your ability. Respect your body, your mind, and others. Treat them the way you yourself wish to be treated, right?
Swinging should not have any bearing on these things. In fact, if more swingers treated each other in this way, we would not see threads titled, "Rude or disprespectful people." or "Interracial swinging" etc etc. I agree with the person who said that you can be a good "christian" and also be a swinger.
Its all about the way you conduct yourself. Its all about moderation and balance. You can drink but you shouldnt drink to excess. You can have fun, but not at the expense of others. I think that it should be a no brainer for all of us.
But it is harder for some than others. LoL.
Luvbugs! (mR.)
;)
Games - - I recommend any of the Sex is Fun line. They're very well made, many, if not most with swingers in mind. I've got most of them myself. I'm not familiar with the ones you mentioned, but if they're any good I'd love to hear about it.
First Meeting - - After about 5 years of being in the lifestyle that is still a problem for us on knowing when is the right time to take it to the next level. Our first time was unexpected. It was back when then web cam became popular and we played on cam with some friends of ours. One evening we went out to have a few drinks with them. After an evening of drinking we said our good-byes at the bar and drove home. We didn't realize that they followed us home and pulled in the drive right behind us. She asked can she use the bathroom and when she came out of the bathroom she was naked. And we have been swingers ever since. We are still very close friends with them and hang out all the time.
Swingers Kickball Society - - Our next Meeting will be Thursday July 8th...
Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - It sounds like a great idea, we too are also looking for people that we can trust and let it all go. Count us in.!
Why are there so many swingers from Utah? - - It always seems like the big groups of swingers are somewhere else! ;)
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