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Utah - - We like the fact that as swingers in Utah we have this dirty little secret that we have and we can sneak around (not unlike a cheating spouse we imagine) behind our neighbors, family and the Church's back doing all sorts of evil deeds and loving every minute of it. We've met TONS of Mormon "refugees" like ourselves who are so happy and excited to finally have the yoke of the Church off our backs that we go quite wild and enjoy our debauchery all the more. Other areas we've lived and "swung" don't quite have the same naughty feel as though we're getting away with something quite forbidden. So yeah, a lot of living in Utah can be a compromise and some of it downright sucks but overall it's extremely fun being EXTREMELY bad here. ;-) The Evildoers

Swingers In Uniform - Pay your memorial day respects here. - Um, Red Hun. I completely get all the points in your post but the one thing that that jumped under my skin, is the statement that this Don Juan asshole is a "fucking" Democrat based on his fucked up views. My husband (and others in my family) serve(d) in the military too and WE ARE DEMOCRATS. Being one, I do not agree with the shit he said in his post and it serves him right for the backlashing that he received for what he said. I completely support our our troops and is very grateful for what they did and are still doing. I also know plenty of Dem. who feel the same way I do, just as I know a few Rep. who has that dickwads same point of view. But to place him in our category in such a derogative way, offends me. Its like saying "Oh shit, you smell like a wet dog when you get out the shower...You must be white" or "Damn, your nose is big...You must be black". See how offensive that is. Not to spark a heated thing in this positive thread, I just wanted to let you know. Now back to our regularly scheduled thread...lol Plain and simple...We don't wanna claim him....try pushing his ass off onto another group... :p

Mixed Lifestyle Parties - - [quote=Cpl4Fwb][quote=WEWNT2PLAY]Although for those that would be concerned about being outed in the LS, what is the overall concern? I mean if I'm considering this type of party it's not like the bishop or pastor is going to be there, and the likelihood of being seen elsewhere would be slim to none. None the less they are valid concerns and now I have to decide what to do.[/quote] We are only speaking for ourselves here ... Discretion - we would prefer to choose to whom we reveal our lifestyle actives with. Even on lifestyle sites and other social media sites, we enjoy a level of anonymity. We control what and to whom we reveal more identifying information (face pictures, names, contact info, etc). Yes, there is a risk in going to lifestyle events and parties. However, most people in the lifestyle believe in mutual assured destruction. If someone tells their vanilla friends, "Hey, I saw Dave & Danna at a swinger party.", their vanilla friends would probably ask, "What were you doing at a swinger party?" In our time in the lifestyle, we have run into three co-workers, two high school classmates, the mother of a child on our child's athletic team, and a woman who we shared a daily commute with on public transportation. So yes, there is a good chance people may run into others from their vanilla lives in the lifefstyle at some time or another.[/quote] We agree with most of these comments. Vanilla people have absolutely no reason to keep LS peoples secrets, and I think they’re more likely to gossip about something relatively foreign to them (like a LS party they attended). I’ve had two vanilla coworkers in my office talk about going to The NYer to people watch swingers, and that just made me cringe. I would not trust a vanilla person to keep our secret, and even less if we saw them at a “mixed” type of party where any conclusions could be made. We would rather keep our vanilla friends and our LS friends completely separate for privacy’s sake. No matter how hard vanillas try, most of them cannot wrap their heads around our LS, and just avoiding vanillas while pursuing our LS hobbies is our safest bet. Being fully open to the world about being a swinger is absolutely not something we want in a couples friendship either. We would avoid that as much as we would avoid any chance of vanillas finding out about us. Guilt by association could be just as harmful to our personal and professional lives. As was said above though… your party, your friends. Just make sure all your LS friends are aware of what you’re doing. Some may not care, some could absolutely care if vanillas were there.

What is your main lifestyle insecurities? - - Probably for the two of us it's our ages and how that may affect our sex appeal and just below that our lack of consistent availability. if you fill up your life with positives, like starting a family, those positives eventually fill up your life so much that you just don't have much time left for swinging. If you live a life where there is so much positive opportunity and companionship, and not enough time for everything you might want to do then you are lucky. We are lucky! Swingers often want playmates that they can see weekly. That's not something we can promise.

Swinger & 🦄 Bait - An experiment to attract swingers and unicorns. - [quote=1404allin]So I see the posts with the black ring and the comments that you have worn them that way for years with no luck. May I point out that you have them on the wrong hand. In the lifestyle the black ring goes in your right hand. People probably just think your marries with a job that won’t let you wear gold 😂[/quote] Haha, it just feels too weird wearing it on the right hand. And I can wear gold but a gold rubber/silicon band doesn't look that good so I just stick w/ black and/or silver. You don't want a hard material that has a higher breaking point than your finger in my line of work.

Sex vs. Guilt - Atheists have 'better sex lives than followers of religion who are plagued with guilt' - [quote=EVILDOERS]I'm still trying to figure out how/why they "preyed" for forgiveness. Interesting topic after watching swinging evolve here in Utah for the past 25 years and seeing those coming from strict Mormon backgrounds (ourselves included) either abandon the faith and/or faith in general or try to rationalize their adulterous activities. We've met quite a few people who while fucking suddenly decide it's getting too late since they have church in the morning. Gives new meaning to the term "Fast Sunday".[/quote] When you consider that the largest religious group in Utah is the LDS faith it is not surprising that the largest group of swingers is from that faith. I was told by mother that the fly boys of WWII used to say that Mormon girls don

Swinging and LDS... - Are the two compatible? I know this is a huge can of worms... - We were talking to someone we thought was a "vanilla" friend last night. She has told us in the past how she is a total LDS member and "very religious", yet we just found out that she is and has been in the lifestyle for quite a while. We are a bit perplexed. While we are not LDS, we assume the church would frown on the lifestyle. Is this not the case? Or are LDS'rs living a "double life"? We all do to a certain extent, we don't advertise that we are swingers. But, to you who are active LDS members, how hard is to maintain while attending church? To those who are not and have dated LDS members, is it difficult to have poly relationships with members? What are some of the obstacles? We do like her very much.

PICTURE SURFERS HANG A 180 LOL - - Here is one for ya......Has every one been seeing those ads , on swinger sites mind you, that say "We are looking for friends MAYBE more". Did they forget what site they were on. This isn't the place to be "wishy washy". If your here you need to be serious and not waisting serious swingers time. If your saying MAYBE you should take a little more time and be very sure that this is for you. Does anyone agree?

Swingers now officially a high risk group for STDs and STIs - Do your own research - [quote=ABCMAN] yeah, I do know several woman who use dental dams [/quote] Really? I've never met a single one.

The statistics of swinging - Relationship longevity in the lifestyle. - One thing we've noticed (and even had a few close calls with ourselves) is that, once the initial thrill of swinging/swapping wears off a little bit, many people look for the NEXT big thrill...usually separate play. And THAT, if you're not really prepared for it and don't go into it with your eyes wide open, is when things can get really sticky. I have an acquaintance in the lifestyle who is a professor of physiology who likes to talk at length about the "love hormone", oxytocin, and how powerful it can be in some lifestyle circumstances. I guess a subset of this issue might be how many swingers who break up do so because they fall in love with someone else in the lifestyle. One particularly insidious behavior that we've, unfortunately, encountered are men, both single AND married, in the lifestyle who attempt to ply Ms. Evil by saying things like, "If you were mine I would never want to share you.". There are probably a fair number of women (and probably men) who might be susceptable to that type of talk if they're insecure in their primary relationship.