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Swingers - a couples only lifestyle? - Are singles considered to be swingers? - Swinger is defined by the one defining themselves a swinger....
Isn't It All About Marketing? - Interesting what people post in profiles and pictures - I find all aspects of the lifestyle interesting. One of the most interesting is what swingers post on these types of sites - who they are, what they are looking for, and their public and private pictures.
Isn't it all about market ourselves? I will not make any judgmental remarks here, because we should not be judgmental in the lifestyle; however, sometimes I wonder what they are trying to communicate.
Because I am a professional website designer I probably look at things differently, also because I am a voyeur I like to see good quality images - ones that show me something about what can be expected in sexual play.
I also wonder if I am reading/seeing more in things that are posted than are really intended - i.e., personality, intelligence, playfulness, etc.
Thus my questions:
Do people take the time here to make a good impression?
Are they trying to open doors or to close deals?
Do they do well at marketing themselves?
Do you have opinions about what is good marketing on a swinger site?
Cheers,
Charles for Lauri and Me
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - It's unfortunate that you've had this happen to you, and apparently twice with the same couple, no less?
While unfortunate, it's also par for the course. Perhaps one of the most cliche and over-used phrases we see appear on profiles is "drama free", and we always take that with a grain of salt.
The truth is there is no such thing as 100% drama or issue-free couples.
Even if they insist on their drama-free status, we also realize that we are all human, and these things are bound to happen from time to time.
The key is not to find the ideal couple but to find the couple that deals with life (swinging) ideally. Find couples that are efficient and adept at dealing with issues between themselves, and are not so selfish to let things get as far as the bedroom before unresolved issues they have in regards to swinging arise during play.
We've had a few situations like that...and they've always been deal-breakers for us. We simply don't have fun if we have to work that hard at making something happen.
However, as a consequence, we've become very successful at filtering and weeding out those couples from the get-go. It's really not that challenging, because there is so much that you can read from people simply by observing them, their body language, how they interact with each other, how they compose themselves while you talk about a potential play dates with you, etc.
Even if they're not inclined to be verbally honest up front with you two in a direct fashion, it's typically obvious in their behavior what their true expectations are.
Asking direct questions about expectations has been mentioned and is always an excellent idea. We've found little things along the way that we take for granted as being non-issues for us are actually huge issues for other couples.
Preferences for foreplay, whether or not kissing is allowed, and if so...kissing with tongue. What about oral, is that acceptable? You see, for us they are acceptable, but we must establish that they are with other couples.
We've also found that more drama tends to be centered around the males in couples (sorry fellas).
I'm not stereotyping here, but this has been our experience. We've had more than our fair share of guys that are ok with everything from girl on girl play, to my girl on him play, to both girls on him play, but once his gal plays one on one with another male besides him....oh Lord, the drama starts!
Swinging has been one of the funnest decisions we've made, cuz we've made it that way, and we elect to avoid the drama at all costs, and that keeps things light and fresh. We know for every couple or bad experience we come across, there are 10 more good ones just around the corner. :)
~J~
Lifestyle Resorts - Which is best in your opinion? - A lot of good descriptions have been given. I don't want to rehash what has already been said, so I'll stick to a few new ones that I can add. Somewhat conflicting opinions have been given about Sea Mountain. If you want a detailed description of that place, please PM me.
In California, you also have Black's Beach, just below Torry Pines golf course & glider port. It's a nude beach that is physically stressful to access & generally fairly sparse with people. If you like privacy, it can be a great place. Laguna Del Sol in California is probably the single largest nudist resort in the US. Play here is mostly on the down low.
Florida's east coast has several traditional swing clubs that are close to Haulover nude beach. There is also a less traditional place called the Roof Top Resort in Lauderdale. It's a nude property where play is common. It has a pool on the roof & some play rooms as well as many overnight rooms. Deenies Hideaway is a low key on-premise place not too far from there where you can hang out by the pool or the pool table all day & all night. It's low key & frequented by moderately attractive people. It's usually not too packed. Trapeeze is an action packed club that is frequently packed & generally has a fairly pretty crowd. Miami Velvet is more of a dress to the 9's swing club. All of these are on-premise.
The west side of Florida has a large concentration of clubs in Pasco County, which claims to boast the largest per-capita quantity of nudists in the US. Some facilities are laid back hippy type places. Some are very upscale & boast a wide variety of facilities. Some have large live-in communities. None that I know of in this area have an actual beach that you can use. The one that has a fresh water beach also has signs warning of alligators. Some have very active swingers in residence. Let me know if you want more specific details.
Holland has some excellent clubs, including the single best one that I have been to.
Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? -
Don said...
We view the lifestyle as a multifaceted creature. The sex part being a benefit. In order for a person to want to have sex, they have to be attracted to the other person in some way shape or form.
For some, age is an issue. Should we fault them?? I think not. Just as we've discussed in other threads about D&D, Smoking, Sexual Practices etc. The list is long. I think this has to do with preference. Are some people picky yes. Don't let their decision hamper your good time. There are many couples that this is an issue. Most people's taste doesn't change because someone complains. I say move on.
We don't have an issue with age so much as we do attitude and personality. As some of you well know, I (Don) am very opinionated and love to say what's on my mind. Some don't like that. Some thing I am a prick. For those of you that think that...
Anyway, as we say in the Army, suck up and drive on. Don't let rejections rule your outlook, let your successes. Good luck.
-D-
Question for the ladies - - Just asking them their size does not work. They are not truthful about it. It was not MY wife who laughed at the guy. She has been very patient with the guys so far, even though she hasn't gotten what she wanted. I hate to see her disappointed. We are exclusively looking for singlemen, we do not go to house parties or swingers clubs.
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - -
Lifetime Member
Location: SALT LAKE CITY, UT
Join Date: Nov 18, 2004
Posted By: XXXTASYX2 Reply posted on:
Jan 8, 2008 - 1:59 pm
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I guess that means if we were hanging out with you, you would be ok with us talking shit about Rednecks.
thats right you can say what u want
we are friends,not just for the good times but also for the bad,
i get pissed of at my we guy and cuss him out and we got over it,,
because we are friends and have been for 2 years
thats what friends are
Having a Swingres day at lagoon - Swingers at lagoon - We think it would be a fun time count us in. Pick a day early so we can reserve a camping spot for some after hour fun. We put together a campout up at Echo Reseviour a few years back also that was fun. We would be interested in any campouts, bike rides and traveling to any fun destinations also. Keep us informed.
Thanks Dave and Jackie
Meet swingers in Tooele - Where do the swingers hang out in Tooele? - We Live in Tooele and so far nothing for swingers that I have heard of?
What are swingers really looking for ?Are they looking for frien - Has the happen to you. - Punctuation. Try it. It's cool.
Do what's best for YOU. Don't justify yourself to others. Don't explain yourself. Chock it up to a learning experience and move on. Pondering motives in the lifestyle is a waste of time.
-R
