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Why the male side of Couples are here...? - I will admit I am hoping to spark some heated debate on this.... - (from Terry) And now I'm starting to understand why Evil and I seem to have senses of huimor that sometimes run in the same direction. It's because, in at least some pretty important ways, we see the world in the same way. I'm here for two reasons. First, I was doing this for a while back when it was one Hell of a lot harder than it is now for single men, they were very nearly completely excluded from the lifestyle which, then, was usually called, by both those inside and outside of it, "wife swapping". The very title, and the basic premise of things then, essentially disqualified single men. Now I'm talking about the late '70s and early '80s. Actual "hippiedom", and the free love philosophy was either diminishing, dying off, or dead, depending on where in the country you were. But we'd managed to change society's general view of some things, and sex was one of the biggest. The attitude change, especially on the part of women, who were no longer automatically "sluts" if they enjoyed sex and didn't need to be married, or engaged, or even "going steady" to indulge, together with effective and easily available birth control (illegal in every state until sometime in the early '60s, even condoms were ostensibly sold as and were labeled as being specifically for "disease prevention", and no worries about deadly and/or incurable STDs had changed the world, and birthed what is often referred to as a "sexual revolution". It was almost like falling off a log to go out on a weekend and find an amenable girl. So why the Hell was I bothering with the "wife swapping" world, when it was so damned difficult to even penetrate, let alone to "get something"? For the same reason I was one of those long-haired (except for my 3 years in the Army) hippie freak. I LOVE people who ignore what the rest of the world is telling them to do or not to do, and I want to be around them. Yeah, there are all sorts of individual exceptions, but, for the most part, as compared to the vanilla people, swingers are more intelligent, more likely to use their heads for something besides a hat rack, and, despite the various complaints about certain kinds of people or actions that pop up here, a Hell of a lot less judgmental and intolerant of people who aren't the same as they are. They, again as a general rule, think for themselves, and don't just latch on to the currently popular opinion about whatever. Why I'm here now is that I'm married to a girl 24 years younger than me, who happens to enjoy a couple things I can do but which I'm not really into, and she's at that so-called female sexual peak point in her life. And I figure that my main purpose in the world is to do everything I can to make her as happy as she can be. Being witches, we don't have the standard "you belong to me and only me" attitude about our life partners, we don't think sexual fun with some other person does a damned thing to diminish our relationship; if I have sex with Jane Doe or she has sex with John Smith (and maybe Jane Smith, too), we are still the same people afterwards that we were beforehand. So getting back into it, and bringing her into it, was a great way to help her have the kinds of fun she likes, and for me to hang around with a group of people that I really like. And meet and play with girls I really like. I'm one of those weird guys who does read the profiles before looking at the pics, and even once in a great while even send off an email before I've even seen any of the pics besides the main profile pic. It's just a lot more important who she is and what she's like than it is what she looks like. And I'll find lots more girls that I like and respect here than I ever could in the vanilla world. One thing about what Team said, though. Swinging can bring out and amplify problems in a relationship. But avoiding that is just a question of attitude. First, you have to absolutely trust in your partner's honesty with you. Even though the Mrs. has a hall pass, the only provision being that I meet any guy she might play with before she does, so I can feel like she's going to be safe with him, I know I'd be really upset if she ever started messing around with someone on the side without me even knowing it was going on. But In don't ever even worry about that actually happening, because I trust her completely. Just like she trusts me, not only to not start a secret "affair" with someone, but to never try to even influence who she does or doesn't play with. She knows that when I meet some potential playmate of hers, even if for some reason I think he's a total jerk, I'm not going to say anything. She's the one who will be playing with him, not me, so it's her job, not mine, to decide who's worth playing with. She knows the only time I'll have anything to say about whether she should or not is if I get an impression somehow that the guy can't be trusted to treat her well, and not ever hurt her, ever do or try to do anything she doesn't want. Point is, if you both don't totally trust each other, you're likely to have problems, even if neither of you ever actually does anything sneaky. The second thing is that you can't have the "normal" attitude about your partner, where you feel he or she is in a way your property, and if anyone else uses your property, you're being stolen from. You can't have that feeling that sex equates to love, the kind of love that makes someone want to permanently be with someone. else. If you feel that way, you'll end up worrying that having sex with another person might make him or her decide they've found a better companion, and leave you. Sex is something that goes with that permanent relationship kind of love, but it isn't what determines it. If you can't truly see, and feel, that sex itself is just another enjoyable activity that you do with people you like, just another form of friendship based intimacy like discussing some problem you have with a friend, you're probably going to have problems. If you're at all, in any way or for any reason, at all uncomfortable with your partner having sex with other people, or he or she is uncomfortable with you doing it, then you're probably going to run into difficulties. So it's all a matter of attitude. If you and your partner are truly completely fine with the other having sex with someone else, and if you both trust each other completely, swinging isn't going to destroy your relationship. If both of those attitude type things are not really and truly true for either of you, then it just might. And about that 70 years old thing, Hell, I'm only 6 years away from it, and I haven't yet run into any indications of decline. So far, the girls I've ended up in the bedroom with have been happy with the results. While I haven't yet (thank the Goddess), had to just rely on that ages old bit of wisdom, the one that says "when you're too old to cut the mustard, you can always lick the jar", it ain't everyone that can tie a cherry stem in a knot with his tongue, and I suppose that might be helping me out, but, then again, that always helps out, no matter how young you are [em]Emo_4[/em] But just in case that needing to be taken care of bit is one of those things that happens all of a sudden, like maybe it hits you at one minute past midnight on your 70th birthday, I think I better get Evil to hook me up with those friends of his, so we can have that room all arranged for and booked. Only Evil's limiting himself. I want 3 if those insatiable 22 year olds, one redhead, one blonde, and one brunette. When I commit suicide, I want it to be a truly memorable event, even though I won't be around to remember it. [em]Emo_45[/em] I mean, we can set up cameras and stuff in there, then my wife can get it all edited into a good porn flick, and the proceeds can help her out, in case we haven't managed to find her a nice sugar daddy by then.

Ways to point out Swingers in public - - We were thinking of designing and making a black ring to wear on your right hand. Just like a silicone band. Not sure how many of us would be interested

Looking for Las Vegas fun - Looking for other swingers in Las Vegas - We also live in Vegas. There are several meet & greets every week. Send us an email if you are interested in learning more about them

Mansion Massage Mixer reviews/info? - - Their ad. states "Single males must bring a date or be accompanied by a hosting couple". We've only been to one so we're going back tonite & see if our 1st impression was correct. #1 The Mansion is a super cool place, well worth visiting. #2 - seemed to be couples in the 30's - 40's. Not many of us "more mature" swingers there. #3 Didn't see much playing, a little in the hot tub, but the massages looked awesome! #4 We left about 12:00 so the party may have warmed up after we left.

Butterfinger commercial - Was that a swinger add? - Absolutely thought it was a swingers ad.

Obama's Roadtrip - - [quote]Fair enough. Then why rely on them for anything that likely wasn't adequately studied?[/quote] Likely just does not do it for me...When the numbers are given AND shown how they were gathered, I tend to believe they are fairly accurate. [quote]Let's take your Pepsi/Coke example. There is likely nothing befuddling about your scenario. Just one possibility: Where are the two Florida products bottled? Maybe it's the water.[/quote] Both bottled locally, it is chalked up to being a preferance thing. In WI, lived there for a while, it was called pop or soda, unless a VERY specific thing was needed, a Mountain Dew for instance. In the south, it is a Coke no matter what it is. If someone in the south offers a Coke, it could be Pepsi, Mountain Dew, Diet Rite, Sam's Club Soda, etc. [quote]I'm glad you agree with the logic. My Bachelor's is in Social Welfare (Psych Minor). Human nature is only a bitch of a thing when you get out there a few standard deviations. The bulk of us are as predictable as rats.[/quote] Believe it or not, I have 2 BA's (econ and int. rel.) with a minor in social work. So I am very aware of social science standards and SOME believe that we're predictable. If you have a smaller sample, we are fairly predictable, especially when the sample is taken from a specific group of people (swingers for instance, better yet, swingers in a specific region), once you get to the larger populations (nationwide for instance), human behavior is not easily quantified. Try being the ONLY conservative in all the social work classes, it was fun! Then again, opinions are like assholes, everyone has one. [quote]I propose that as an economist you are simply looking at things with a limited perspective. [/quote] Possibly, but I also have a rare ability to look at it from an outsider's view.... [quote]There is simply no question that if a person's basic needs (food and shelter) are met, there is less motivation to risk the consequences of violating societal rules.[/quote] I can see the logic of this, however, we are Americans, we always want MORE, we are constantly bombarded with images of MORE, we are constantly told that without MORE we are incomplete, etc. What are the consequences of violating societal rules? Food, shelter, clothing, TV, etc? Really tough there. Look at prisons in Mexico, if your family does not provide, you starve, more than likely. THAT is consequences, it is a deterrant (sp?). IMHO, one of the reasons for our increased crime rates is the lack of public punishment. If every time you turned around, you saw a group of people in black and white stripes mowing lawns, trimming trees, etc. on the side of the road in leg chains, it would cut crime considerably. If they did public executions, it would cut crime dramatically. Then again, I am a staunch supporter of heavy penalties for crimes, especially when they are repeat offenders, most of the social scientists are not. They want more rehab and such, which I also support, BUT only for first timers, not for repeat offenders. Anyway, I am thoroughly enjoying our debate... Next!

Hey, a bunch of us are going to the American Bush tonight!! - - Not all swingers, a bunch of single girls too, but should be a lot of fun! If you want to meet up with us there and get acquainted, let me know!! Respond if you would like the details. I think about 12 of us are going so far. M & D LVSTRIPPERBABE

What sets you apart from other swingers - Lets see whos looking for what. - What sets you apart from the crowd? Who does what to put some couple above all the rest? Single guys/girls, your in this too! What do you have to offer better than others? What do you think gives you the edge on other couples, singles, hard, soft? Is it bodies, technique, skill, age, oral, toys, knowledge, popularity? If your a guy that says"I gotta big dick" thats lame...WTF do you do with your "Big dick" besides slap it around on a cam. Ladies, do you pretend on cam?, or do you give good head?..trust us guys, we have all had good and bad head! or do ya got a pussy that makes any man scream? Whats your talent? Whats your weakness? Wheres the spot that someone can hit, and you can no longer walk?..lol What do you do that makes legs quiver? Time for an interesting thread here...something thats useful and ya may get a hot date out of it!!;) ~D&T~

Why are there so many swingers from Utah? - - We were just noticing that alot of the posters on this forum are from Utah, is Utah like a hotbed for swingers or something? just curious :)

HAS THIS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU? - - There are a lot of swingers out there that 1) should consider themselves Poly. meaning they want a meaningful relationship with others. or 2) they have spent so much time and energy in trying to find a match that once they do they make bad judgements calls in regard to how to handle the relationship. The best thing to do is lots of communication. However if that does not work run fast. Some people do have attactment issues.