Sanborn Swingers in New_york

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Where are the Midwest Swingers? - - As a couple from Utah, there is quite a surprising amount of swingers here in the state. For whatever reason, which I can't explain, other than "we're just freakier here" there definately seems to be a higher concentration of Utah swingers on this site than some of the others. I guess the moral of the story is "come to Utah!" LOL Just Kidding, good luck finding midwestern swingers, I know they're out there. When you live in Utah, the kink just comes out I guess!

Question - do you talk about other swingers? - Never mention names! One thing we've found over the years is that people who swing, particularly those who belong to clubs, have too much to say about other people. I don't want to hear about it.. The people who are typically being trashed may be friends and we may have had different experiences with them. Best thing is simply the illustrated comments about what your version of swinging is. Descretion means or should mean what happens with others stays there and is not discussed. People may mesh differently with others and your experience or theirs is irrelevant. So MUM's the word. Ray

Single Males - - [quote=CTA313][quote=EVILDOERS] ...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote] Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopter”. Call me old-fashioned. [quote=EVILDOERS] I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote] Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait. I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to. [quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote] This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging. [quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote] If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did” chestnut. [/quote] Yes, I agree, "finesse" was a poor choice of words. In my defense, I was at work and rather in a hurry to make a point...that apparently I didn't make well (and my attempts to also be humorous apparently fell flat too). Rereading my post it does smack a little of mild gender bias but I can assure you that it wasn't my intent in any way and most certainly is not my outlook on women, relationships or life in general. My intent was simply to advocate approaching swinging as a mutually desirable activity that two partners desire and share equally in. And not that it matters, but I've shared my wife with probably over a hundred men, married and single, and I've never thought of any of them as competition. But I never thought of swinging as "sharing" my wife either, but instead as her deciding to be sexual with another person and me being totally okay with her decision to do so. Sharing her, to me, almost denotes some sort of ownership or at very least some kind of permission that I would have to give. Both those ideas are not a part of our relationship. Perhaps the concept of "competition" in swinging interactions is a single male attitude? I don't know. And I didn't mean it in any way, shape, or form as a "you must suffer as I did" trope but simply as the idea that we invested a LOT of hard work and time making our marriage what it is and together deciding to risk opening it up to the excitement and also the possibility of harm that is swinging. I think, perhaps, that sometimes single people in the lifestyle don't quite understand the very real possibility of permanent damage (or worse) to the relationship that couples who swing are flirting with. For many (most?) of us, our marriages/relationships are THE most precious thing we have. What, if anything, are you risking? A bruised ego?

Black Ring - Who has theirs and how have they caught on? - We both have black rings and have worn them in public and to places like Habits, etc.. And we've done this off and on for well over 10 years (when we first became aware of what seems to be more or less a swinging urban legend). To date we have NEVER been approached by another couple and asked if we were swingers or anything close to it. Maybe we're just fugly and nobody wants to fuck us but the whole black ring thing is a big FAIL IMHO. Even if it ever did catch on it probably wouldn't take more than a few days to a few weeks for it to get out on social media, etc., and everyone would be looking for swingers with black rings in public (not unlike times we've gone to takeovers and had to wear wrist bands and it quickly got out to hotel staff, other guests, etc. that people wearing wrist bands were there for a swinger event). Most people (not all) involved in swinging really don't want their vanilla friends, family or coworkers...or even strangers to know they're swingers. Most vanillas pretty much classify swingers as worse people than Ashley Madison cheaters and used car salesmen. Much easier in our opinion to "meet" people at dedicated meet and greets or parties or here and other places online than to hope for serendipitous encounters out in public.

looking for a fun gal - dating more - "any ideas are greatly appreciated" Ok.... I have a lot of lady friends that are very open minded but they would never be found on a swingers website and would not be interested in swinging. If you are just looking for a "cool chick to hang with" and are not looking for a single female swinger I'd say check out the regular dating sites. If I suddenly became single you would NOT find me here....I'd look for a regular relationship FIRST....

Mexico! Come with us!!! :) - Trying to put together a group of Swingers to go to Mexico with us! - We have a little one but shouldn't be a problem, hopefully there's alot of hot babes!

april 2011 swingers cruise - - We're doing our CruisErotica Pre-Cruise stowaway night again for the April cruise too. We'll have the rooms at the Hampton Inn in Ybor city same as usual. Just give us a shout. cheers Char & Jim Char Travel.com

april 2011 swingers cruise - - we are booked on the april cruise out of tampa. We are wondering where everyone is staying the knight before,and if there are any groups or forums where we could meet online before the voyage. C @ M

After Holloween Party! - Nov 7th at 7pm party! - Club Insomniacs, located in the same plaza as Bourbon Street in NPR is having a PRIVATE party for swingers Sunday Nov 7th starting at 7pm. Single females are $10.00, Single Males are $30.00, and couples are $20.00. There will be Karaoke, Games, Contests with prizes, and a buffet. Oh and it's a THEMED PARTY! Naughty Nighties *for the ladies* & Unusual Undies *for the men*!!! Hope to see you there!!! Josh and Meg!

New Years Party (1/2 In Pocatello) - Let's celebrate 2015 and welcome 2016!! - Well, it is that time of year for us all to look back on the year that is just about over and reflect upon it as it has been an interesting year for our group of sexy friends. It is also time to look ahead to 2016 in the hopes that it will be an even better year for us all. So come on out and join us for a chance to get together some of our sexy friends and welcome in the New Year together. This party will be on Saturday, January 2nd in the Jasper Room at the Clarion Inn in Pocatello starting at 8:00 pm. We will have full bar service and some hors d'oeuvres available. In addition to that we have reserved 2, 2-room king suites for those who wish to break away from the party and have some sexy fun. Due to the nature of this party and the arrangements we have made, there will be a cost for admission. Tickets are $25 for a couple and $15 for single males and or females. Due to the size of the room we have rented for this party, there will be a limited number of tickets available (30 couples tickets and 15 singles tickets). Tickets are available for purchase online at Ticket Leap (http://idaho-swingers-r-us.ticketleap.com/2016-new-years-party). We hope to see you there for a good time!