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swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - You have to love the forums. They truly bring out the 'best' in people. What better way to know what lives below the superficial covering we put forth in our profiles. Keep it up ;)
Ways to point out Swingers in public - - We’ve also heard the black ring on right hand thing (no middle finger, that signifies asexuality). Mine is a black version of The One Ring from LOTR but I’m a geek.
tired of the B>S> - - u know, i don't think we're validated or certified or whatever they call it here on this site. we've been on so many it's hard to keep track. anyway, we're very real and we just don't give a hoot about validations anymore. i guess u could say we've progressed thru maslow's hierarchy of needs for swingers to the self-actualized phase. that's a clever way of saying we no longer give a rat's ass what other people think. ;)
we've been swingers since 2003, and we really only went to a lot of parties and sought out new experiences with regularity for the first 2 years. now it's just another "thang" we dabble in from time to time when the mood hits us...mostly on vacation, weekend getaways, and stuff like that.
and we really have no ego stake in how many unsolicited emails we do or don't get from people asking us to hook up or inviting us to parties. if we get the itch, we'll look around, find something that piques our curiosity, and send them a message.
it's all really no big deal. and we have found that folks who get wrapped around the axle about this stuff are not the kind of folks we want to hang out with anyway.
Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - It's on our to do list:)
Swingers Kickball Society - - i could wait on bench!! lol
Discretion, the better part of valor - I love that saying - It's a tough one. Women will ALWAYS get more action here than men. Sex is theirs when it comes to power and control. The "you can only get as much as I can get" has never worked for us. But our situation is a little different in that I travel a ton for work so when I'm home I can't see spending what little time I have with someone else. And being on the road, I don't have time to get any action. So the equality in playing separate isn't there. As a result, Mrs. Sexperimentor doesn't play without me unless it's another woman. That's her choice and a bone thrown to equality, which I appreciate.
As for the issue of not playing because you're afraid you'll run into a playmate in your vanilla life... To me that's horse pucky. The person you run into will be at just as much risk as you of being "outed". You'll have a lot more in common than a whole lot of other people you meet. And if you have a little discretion about who you play with, you'll have similar attitudes on how to conduct yourselves in a vanilla situation. Actually, I don't think we have EVER, in all the years we've been doing this, just run into anyone we've played with. There are people we've known to be swingers but haven't played with that we've run into, one lady I run into frequently, but life in the lifestyle has never even been discussed in vanilla settings.
I hope this isn't your situation, but the last couple I knew that would play separately but not together, with a story told essentially the same way you told yours, didn't end well. She was more interested in having other romantic relationships than she was in maintaining her marriage. Frankly, while playing without my wife is fun, and we share the tales and details afterward, I'd really rather play as a couple. Our playing together has enhanced our relationship and that's what I'd encourage you to do.
Mr. Sexperimentors
Swingers Vacation Spots - Help us - Hi all.
Our swingers holiday experience is SAILING! Have a look at www.swinger-reisen.de!! At the moment in German and Dutch only, but if you want more info just ask us.
A hug from The Netherlands.
Polyamory, Swinging, and the Single Man - - We know a few people that associate with the poly community, as in consider themselves poly and we have been to a few poly pot lucks ourselves. The poly people we know are all very nice people. None of the people we actually know that that consider themselves poly have ever actually been in a long term full on poly relationship as in everyone involved ending up equally as committed to each other and the relationship. We have known people where a married couple, with a bisexual wife had a live in relationship with a bisexual woman but in the end it did not last very long and the couple and the woman went their separate ways and we have know a few couples that have been in exclusive relationships with another couple where part of the equation wanted to basically make it as permanent as their primary relationship and part of the equation did not. Relationships with commitments, especially those that are the most rewarding are life altering and if you are not really, all in, heart and soul the advanced level of commitment and the corresponding obligations will eventually become a burden you may be unwilling to bear. If what is looking for as an individual is deep passionate friendships without expectations and obligations, that you feel reduce your freedom, then a poly relationship and marriage may not be in their best interest. There is nothing wrong with that. If a deeply pair bonded couple wants the freedom to enjoy deep and passionate friendships with others, including sex, without the same level of obligation and expectation they offer one to another then are they poly or are they swingers? Probably more swingers than truly poly-amorous or maybe they are poly light or swinger intense.
The secret may be to figure out who you are and then be true to yourself. A lack of understanding of self can lead to disappointments in relationships. Intentionally misrepresenting or misleading someone for sex rarely and probably never ends up all good. We all on occasion may unintentionally end up misleading someone when we try and be what we think others wants us to be and in the end we just do not have it in us.
We can say for a certainty that we are not poly in the truest sense of the word or really even poly light. Our relationship as a couple is paramount and we willfully and joyfully commit to all the obligations and commitments and even the disagreements that accompany living our lives together and with our progeny. We both inherited genes that seem to have targeted both of us to seek out a life long partner, have and raise a family and to express ourselves sexually mostly together as a couple. We have been in a couple of longer than usual not really exclusive relationships where we were seeing the same people pretty much weekly. We discovered that we are okay with having good friends with sexual benefits but the ability or the desire to be in a poly relationship is just not within either one of us. Self discovery and relationships often requires a bit of experimentation and a lot of self examination. Affiliating and seeking to self identify with a group to achieve acceptance friendship and sex is pretty common and pretty normal. Many of the people we know that self identify as poly are not unwilling to enjoy a little sex for sex sake between friends so long as they understand that is all that is happening.
Good luck and have fun!
Vegas: Swingers circle or couples oasis? - Which do I prefer - Never been to swinger circle. We were told about couples oasis when we lived in Vegas by other locals. WD have been to the green door , red rooster and couples oasis. And out of all three couples oasis was the one I liked the best. It is the only one that does not allow single guys. Nothing against them but in that kind of setting they tend to give off that creepy feeling. Anyways it kinda like the manor there is a cover and it would is BYOB. There's a bar with a dance floor. Pool tables with a snack area. A group play area and some private play areas also a outdoor pool. During the summer I think they have pool parties on Sunday. Out of the 3 it is the only one I would go back to.
Are you a Swinger or Liver? - - Lmao 😂 wow!! This post…. The problem your having isn’t that your lifestyle as a “liver” is wrong, it’s the fact that you are contradicting yourself . You can’t expect others to not have have rules but have them yourself. It’s not single males that are the issue either, rather the lack of respect/socialization. Everyone is here to have a good time and not everyone is going to be your cup of tea. A lot of swingers I know are mature, respectful and want the same thing in return. Maybe just your experience and what your looking for is the problem.
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