Bergen Swingers in New_york

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When You're Shopping the Scene... - - Yeah, it'd be kinda cool if there actually WAS some kind of universal accessory or a signal that swingers could use to ID each other out in the vanilla world. And many have tried over the years but nothing has ever really caught on (back in the day, more than a few women wore necklaces of an apple with a bite out of it). And even if something DID actually catch on, and people wore it or whatever to identify other swingers, how long do you think it would take for the internet to make that fairly common knowledge? We went to a swinger's convention in San Diego a number of years ago. The group had taken over the entire hotel and property and nobody was allowed in without a special wristband. It took about 4 hours for most of the hotel staff to learn what those wristbands meant. By the next day, people at nearby hotels, restaurants, and shopping centers had heard the news and as you passed people they would glance at you and then immediately glance down at your wrist. By that evening, most of the swingers were becoming so self-conscious that they were attempting to hide the wristbands beneath watches and bracelets. A few even pulled them off their wrists, if they were loose enough, and then put them back on when re-entering the property. So, as nice as it would be to know for sure who other swingers are, it would kinda defeat the purpose of what many of us state in our profiles...that we're discreet. I suspect that about 10% (if even) would wear a black ring and about 90% wouldn't for fear of being outed as swingers. YMMV

Why the male side of Couples are here...? - I will admit I am hoping to spark some heated debate on this.... - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET] Frankly if you wrap your self image and your relationship etc., etc., around it and make it a big priority you very well might end up wondering what happened to your life. [/quote] Not that it means much of anything, but this is why I always took exception (with few very dedicated and very successful and very happy exceptions) to people calling this a "lifestyle". Most of the swingers I've met would honestly lose their shit if they made this a big priority. Most of the ones I knew that did so, did lose their shit. And much more.

Rules to hooking up - - [quote=FUCKCHASTITY]Maybe we all ended up swingers because we don't play games. Sounds like everyone was as surprised by these revelations as we were. We are all here for the same thing, no need to dance around it.[/quote] I for one, am grateful.... I'm too lazy to try translating code... It takes up time that would be better spent actually tasting new friends.

Swingers - a couples only lifestyle? - Are singles considered to be swingers? - We agree with the Original poster, singles by definition can not by themselves be swingers. swinging has always meant the exchanging or swapping of partners. BTW using wikipedia as a source is a joke.

Swingers Party - Doesnt mean who ever is there is open to everyone elsa - WISH YOU LIVED CLOSER WE COULD RIDE TOGETHER...WHO KNOWS DAYTONA BIKE WEEK RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER...;)

Single male in this lifestyle.. - I have questions for couples and single females. - [quote=jv666playful]sorry Evildoers but stupid people get my goat [/quote] Look, I hear where you're coming from. But I sort of know this guy. Never actually met him, but there was some, I guess you could say, interaction through emails. And he sort of screwed something up, kind of embarrassed me with someone else, and pissed me off. For a minute. And the reason it was only for a minute (the fact that she thought it wasn't a big thing helped, I'll admit) was that he'd made an honest, but sort of clueless, mistake. And that he really wasn't aware that not doing what you say you're going to, and not letting anyone know until the very last minute when you could have let them know a lot sooner, is a much bigger thing here than it is in the vanilla world. But now he does know, and I'd be amazed if he ever did anything like that again. And my read on him is that he isn't stupid, just ignorant, a basically nice guy trying to figure out how to navigate in an unknown territory. And yeah, this is a topic that keeps coming up. But you know what? I suspect that the guys that bring it up are actually serious about the lifestyle, and that the ones who try it and find out it wasn't the "all the girls want to fuck" scene they thought it would be just shrug their shoulders and go back to the bars. I I suspect that a lot of swingers didn't get into it until they were a couple. And I also suspect that they might not realize what it's like for a single guy, if he's one that isn't just trying to find a quick and easy way to get laid. Believe it or not, not all of them are. Me, it's a case of been there, done that. Back when "free love" was all the rage, before Herpes, AIDS, or any other really serious STD, when any guy who couldn't go out on just about any Friday night and end up in bed with some girl had to be either the Hunchback of Notre Dame or a complete and total asshole,I was a single male in the lifestyle. I sure as Hell wasn't trying to find an easy way to get laid, in those days it didn't take much of an effort at all. And you'd think swinging was easier then, with sex being such a casual, no big deal, thing. But it was actually even harder and more complicated. As Evil said, it was called wife swapping, and it was a seriously bad thing as far as society was concerned. Swinger functions, like Sinful Saturdays, Risquee Soiree stuff, Meet n Greets? No way, Jose. There were only private, invite only, parties. There wasn't any internet, if someone was silly enough to try to set something like that up and advertise in the papers (the only avenue available then), no paper was going to take the ad. Everything was word of mouth, and that word pretty much only went to couples. It was actually dangerous. There were cases (not a lot, thankfully, but some) of the local police somehow finding out about a wife swapping party, raiding it, and hitting everyone there with morals charges. Which could even cost people their jobs. That was in the '70s, it did start to sort of loosen up in the '80s, which is when I left the country and the scene, but it was still more complicated than it is today, with no internet and everything word of mouth and single men by invitation only. So why did I bother, when sex was so damned easy to find everywhere? I LIKED these people, that's why. They were ignoring what everyone thought they should or shouldn't do, and were doing what they thought was right for them. Which is how I've believed, since I was maybe 15, that everyone should be. Point being, not all single males are JUST trying to get laid. So if someone comes along who takes the time and effort to ask how he can navigate what are some pretty treacherous waters, I think he deserves to be treated as if he's serious, just a little clueless, and not be ridiculed for it. Hell, even Evil, who's quicker than anyone I know to jump on utter stupidity with both feet, and ridicule the Hell out of it, gave the guy a break and some good, if blatant and not sugar coated, advice.

St. Petersberg, Florida - - I am sure you will find some place to party at....Love the pics: too funny on the captions. I think there is a place called Taste-Buds not sure if it is still kickin or not? There is also a place called Playfull Swingers. These are two Clubs in the Florida area we know or knew of. Playfull Swingers is a pretty cool bar with theme rooms and a nice dance floor. BTW. maybe you can hit them with an email and see what is happening over there? If these are not in the area you are going to be you can google swingers and the city you are going to be in. We tried to contact some folks on here before we went to Florida to find out a few hot spots but no one bothered to write back? I guess looks are important even when giving someone a heads up or point in the right direction? Regards, HandM

First Meeting - - After about 5 years of being in the lifestyle that is still a problem for us on knowing when is the right time to take it to the next level. Our first time was unexpected. It was back when then web cam became popular and we played on cam with some friends of ours. One evening we went out to have a few drinks with them. After an evening of drinking we said our good-byes at the bar and drove home. We didn't realize that they followed us home and pulled in the drive right behind us. She asked can she use the bathroom and when she came out of the bathroom she was naked. And we have been swingers ever since. We are still very close friends with them and hang out all the time.

We are wanting to host small intimate parties - - [quote=UTCPL]Wow, the amount of emails we have received I think maybe we will just rent the convention center. Whoever is interested send us an email. also thinking maybe we should organize some kind of regular play party & rent out a block of rooms somewhere. Anybody want to talk about that mail us. The whole idea was to get away from the meet n greet & just do what everybody really wants & have a play party. [/quote] That sounds like what we've started doing here on this side of the river. You want to come sit and BS that's fine. But we're going to get naked and do what real swingers do. Believe it or not, some people are actually shocked by that.

Profiles? - - I think for most of us that live outside of the greater Salt Lake area its about location. We live in Southern Utah, which is a swingers wasteland. Do people even read profiles? I think they just look at pics and if they like what they see they may read part of your profile, but not really pay attention to it. I think in light of Mr Uthot's advice I may need a profile makeover too! Ours is as generic as the next one, but nobody really reads it anyway, except to pick at it when I post a controversial thread in the forum, then they read every word, mix it up and spew it back at me! ~K~