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Single Males - - [quote=CTA313][quote=EVILDOERS] ...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote] Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopter”. Call me old-fashioned. [quote=EVILDOERS] I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote] Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait. I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to. [quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote] This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging. [quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote] If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did” chestnut. [/quote] Yes, I agree, "finesse" was a poor choice of words. In my defense, I was at work and rather in a hurry to make a point...that apparently I didn't make well (and my attempts to also be humorous apparently fell flat too). Rereading my post it does smack a little of mild gender bias but I can assure you that it wasn't my intent in any way and most certainly is not my outlook on women, relationships or life in general. My intent was simply to advocate approaching swinging as a mutually desirable activity that two partners desire and share equally in. And not that it matters, but I've shared my wife with probably over a hundred men, married and single, and I've never thought of any of them as competition. But I never thought of swinging as "sharing" my wife either, but instead as her deciding to be sexual with another person and me being totally okay with her decision to do so. Sharing her, to me, almost denotes some sort of ownership or at very least some kind of permission that I would have to give. Both those ideas are not a part of our relationship. Perhaps the concept of "competition" in swinging interactions is a single male attitude? I don't know. And I didn't mean it in any way, shape, or form as a "you must suffer as I did" trope but simply as the idea that we invested a LOT of hard work and time making our marriage what it is and together deciding to risk opening it up to the excitement and also the possibility of harm that is swinging. I think, perhaps, that sometimes single people in the lifestyle don't quite understand the very real possibility of permanent damage (or worse) to the relationship that couples who swing are flirting with. For many (most?) of us, our marriages/relationships are THE most precious thing we have. What, if anything, are you risking? A bruised ego?

Pictures all over the web - - just did a search for our profile name and it's on like 10 different sites that we didn't sign up for. here's a link as an example http://swingers.letsmeetup.com/profile.aspx?user=ripbecki Does this mean swingular is selling our profiles to other sites or what? If not can we a expalantion or what's going on?

Oh for fuck's sake! - Really? - It's not enough that gonorrhea and syphilis is making a 'cum'back? Now we've got a NEW STI to worry about? Take me now, Jeebus! [em]Emo_79[/em] [url=http://www.fox4news.com/news/83981891-story]New sexually transmitted disease scares the actual fuck out of Utah swingers and other perverts :-p[/url]

Utah? - - Hmm.. anything beside swingers? Grocery stores that can't sell wine or liquor, lots of people that support Bush, mini-van drivers bearing testimonies in the left lane on most freeways, a few clubs and bars with last calls around 1-am, hi poser to swinger ratio, no anti-smoking laws, no off premise clubs, no on premise clubs, KSL swing reports, lots of people having sex in really odd underwear, Church controlled politics, less than 1 hour from Vegas or Denver via plane, and totally hot blondes with weekend fun temple recommends!!! But there are truly some fun LS parties, sexy bods, and the most amazing outdoors in the USA! Oh, and awesome skiing on Sunday cause everyone is in church repenting to their Bishop. ;-)

Single guys and emails... - Answering all emails - except from single men who don't seem to read our profile - OK here's another post from another "Narwhal" (single male vs. "unicorn" single female) Valance I think you coined the moniker in another post and hope it sticks because it's comparative nature of desirability even with a 10 ft. pole. I really don't understand couples attempt for the exclussion of single males as not being"swingers" without also excluding the single females as swingers with statments like "stay out of the clubs, your not swingers"or" get a woman first" This is a lifestyle not an exclusive club and there are all types and interests. I admit there are many rude crude and impolite males out there but there are also the same in the couples and single women catagories too. What are my odds of finding a woman into and interested in similar sexual activities in a regular bar or dating site? I'm here mainly for the social aspect(and yes maybe sex!). My reasoning being if one can be open and honest about sex they can and usually are more honest about all other things and this has been a general experience with most of the people I have met. Yes there's sometimes drama .(90% of the time it's either insecurity or honesty related and you'll see me headed the other way..lol) but for the most part I have found all of you folks to be great to be around. I don't ever expect any replies to any email contcts I initiate or receive any initial contact,the good old days of letters of introduction and subsequent curtious replies are regretfuly long gone. The internet just makes it easier to ignore or not acknowledge someone. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone replied without fearing nasty rebukes for rejection issues? The single males are just looking for their needs and desires to be fulfilled just like all of you and don't deserve to be bashed for being single. Being rude, vulgar,overly aggressive or impolite is a different matter. All in all I say have fun and play nice no mater what your preferences are.

Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=LVDREAMER]THANK YOU, HOTTIEHOGANS....there are some single guys out there who are NOT ASSHOLES. Sadly though, we get clumped into the bunch who are. Nice to see someone knows the difference![/quote] Your Welcome! I love single guys. They are fun most of the time. Only a few I have met are totally weird lol. But overall we have had a good experience with the ones we've met

Toga Party this Saturday in SLC - Venus Game Nights - Roman Toga Party for Venus Game Nights - Friends, Romans, Sexy Swingers... Time to bring out your inner Roman! This game night will feature a Roman Toga theme with some accompanying Roman games. The afterparty will be even more eventful and really be something you don't want to miss! If you don't have a toga, you can either make one (instructions on Google) or buy one. If you don't have a toga and can't get one before Saturday, come anyway, it will be totally fine! To RSVP go to https://www.meetup.com/Venus-Game-Nights/events/259608771/ Space is limited so reserve your space early! RSVP on Swingular as well by going here: https://swingular.com/events.php?_a=details&_EID=3397 As usual, the first part of the evening will be the game night portion of the evening and will be pretty laid back, giving everyone a chance to have fun, chat with others, and just have a low-key good time. The second half of the evening will be for those that really want to let their inner Roman out to play. We will have some icebreakers to help everyone bring out their sexy selves. We have rented a house for the evening that will work out very well. With a built-in theater room, we plan on having some great movies playing to keep things hopping. Make sure to dress in your best Roman Toga wear as we will be having a contest for best male and female costumes. Again, if you don't have one, you can still come! The location is in the South part of the salt lake valley. We will provide the address, as well as the house rules after you RSVP and the date draws nearer. Couples and single women are always welcome! No single guys, however. If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to email us here, Meetup or send us a Kik. Our Kik is CalianaZ. See you Saturday! Mr. & Mrs. Caliana

Combining Lifestyle & Non-Lifestyle Friends - - This seems a bit more "adventurous" than I would likely try. There are just such different standards ... comparing swingers and vanilla friends. Recipe for possible embarrassment, trouble ... or whatever, if you ask me.

Stabbing at swingers party? - - A stabbing in Herriman over the weekend has the media reporting it was a "swingers party". I am assuming this is because as the news reports a few couples "got frisky" in the basement, causing several people to reportedly leave and return less than an hour later and stab the party's 22-year old host. The three suspects were all 20 to 22 years old, also. Does anyone know anything about this? Was it a vanilla party gone wrong in a drunken moment, causing some guys to get extremely jealous and now the media is blowing this up to be a "swingers" party? Or was it really a swingers party?

Lake Powell 2013? - - [quote=JIGGY601]We would like to join the trip timing sounds good. We have a boat and truck to pitch in we can have couples ride with us if need be. was just curious because we new to the swingers thing. is it balls to the walls or what happens happens no push or a free for all lets hang and have fun.Would also like to know what to bring so can plan. [/quote] It's a fun time with a chance for a hook up if you are looking for one. No group I have ever been with would put pressure on anyone to do something they didn't want to do. Last year was very low key and people hooked up but it was never a wild crazy party. Lots of nudity and fun flirting but never any pressure to do anything. PLAYNW3 thanks for dragging me behind your boat last year, hopefully I can get you to do it again.