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If you are looking
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Explain why you like being a swinger - - Can't really answer as to the exact question posed, as I am a single guy and, therefore, I suppose I can't really be categorized as a swinger, per se. But as to why I like being part of this site with it's potential for associating with swingers: It's because I have never really fit the standard model of sexuality (if there really is one) and the opportunity to associate with people who have broken out of the "mold" and experience something new and bring something new to the scene is very interesting and exciting to me. Hopefully I will get to do a little more than theorize about it.
Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - SUMINDYFUN: To attempt to better answer your question, this is what we've experienced/learned in our poly-type relationships...
This is so much more of a complex subject than just a quick "blurb", we like to compare it to guessing a 4 combination lock, you know at least 1 or 2 of the correct numbers... but do you really??? You find out an amazing amount about YOURSELF through this process!
We have seen just about everything emerge, from complete unbelievable bliss to complete unbelievable hurt. However, what we've learned is TOTAL honesty, trust, respect, patience and absolute untethered communication are key! These things can either make or break it and breaking it earlier rather than later is a good thing, because if it breaks later then it usually means one or more people missed one or more of the fore-mentioned items and will cause much greater hurt because of all the time/work that was put in by the others.
BTW, apparently the bliss is much more powerful than the hurt because we keep trying and trying for some reason? Yep, its like a drug and we're addicted! This is why we dont fault any one for not wanting to "step through that door" so to speak. We suggest to any one that they open that door very, very slowly and even walk away for a bit before entering fully.
ABCMAN: You hit the nail directly on the head... from our experiences, social conditioning is extremely difficult for most people to overcome.
is it true about swingular??????????????????? - - We will ask that question on the Aug the 16th (Swingular) is coming to Club Elite and parting with all the Tampa Bay Area Swingers....should be a Hot Time.
Preconceived Ideas - - It's been a long time, but I'm not sure that I had any preconceived ideas. I'm poly and responsibile non-monogamy was nothing new to me. On the other side of this relationship B knew I was Poly and she didn't quite understand it but trusted me. She was "curious" that is to say if she saw FF play in a flic she got so gushing wet.. but because of her catholic upbringing, she couldn't be Bi....that's a sin.....??.... Well we went to a party and luckily a couple and staff members sat down and talked to her and she watched people and talked to others and found out they were not pervs. Nurses and medical personel are probably the largest group in swinging. Cops, (police for the people who don't like the other term) truck drivers, mechnics, architects, contractors, engineers etc... So a good cross section of the general populaion are represented.. When she found this out...she embrassed the lifestyle and she loves to dance and... let her libido run. She was no longer curious after a couple of parties.... So she can get nude do whatever she wishes and even have orgasms on the dance floor dancin with herself.... WOW... So her preconceived ideas was that swingers were pervs... Oh...and I guess we are... By the vanilla world.....Give em time... pretty soon maybe everyone will cum over to the lifestyle,,lol
Playboy TV's new show SWING.... - So who all caught the first episode? - We had a ton of fun doing the show and it was very unscripted. They would of course plan the games etc, but what happened, happened. Nothing was forced as far as interaction. What you DONT see on the show is the hours of sitting around and answering the newbies questions and making them understand the mindset and how we live life. In fact, they actually did a good job at minimizing the drama and making a very comfortable situation for all.
The funniest part of the show was actually the crew...they came in with a lot of pre-conceived notions about swingers and by the end of taping we had made some great friends and their minds had changed dramatically about the lifestyle and the people in it. In fact we kept joking about interviewing them and getting their feedback.
Kudos to PBOYTV for showing our lifestyle in a very positive light.!
Permissive still requires permission. - Permissive still requires permission. - [quote=WildNomad]I could go on for days about the misogyny and objectification I have experienced in the swinger world. I'll try to be concise. Here's a quick guide on how to not be part of the problem at lifestyle events. (And when I say "you" below, I mean everyone)
1) Don't objectify women at every opportunity. If my tits are out, they are not out for you to stare at and make comments on every time you interact with me. They are certainly not out for everyone to touch without permission. They are out because I enjoy being naked. Even when I am naked I am still a strong feminist woman. I am not a toy for your to objectify. Treat me like a human.
2) Ask for what you want. Never presume. Do you want to hug, kiss, touch or fuck me? Ask. It's as simple as that. Here's an example. You: "Can I kiss you?" Me: "Hell yes" See? Easy.
3) If it's not a Hell Yes, it's a Fuck No. If all parties involved do not feel 100% Hell Yes! about the situation, it's a no. I see this a lot in one partner "taking one for the team". That is never ok.
There is more but if everyone would do those 3, swinger events would be vastly improved. [/quote]
Just because an actress or actor chooses (Hopefully it was their choice) to be nude on camera, and or act sexual, as in acting, does not mean they owe anyone anything, and they are not granting anyone permission to take sexual liberties with them.
Same can be said for nudity, or sexual behavior at a swingers event. Or on a web site for what it's worth. We suppose, that if we get naked and behave sexually, in a semi public venue, that we cannot completely control who might see us. Granting permission to view, through proximity, does not grant permission to touch, or take any other sexual liberties.
weight approperate - -
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Then Don "De Libertine" said...
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Well, like age, lifestyle, hygiene and other physical attributes, weight is subject to an individual's taste. We are all unique in what we desire and while some do not mind overweight people, some do. Should we fault them? One should think not. We should just find those we are most compatible with.
I am a bigger guy (230) and I do not expect any woman to "get" with me just because they show interest in being friends. The sex part of this is a reward that comes after both parties have established where they stand in the meeting or friendship. Just because we are all "Swingers" doesn't mean we lack taste. Swingers couple are single people X 2 in regard to sex. Meaning as a single you don't look for any ole piece of ass that comes along. You try and find what you consider a hottie. Same goes if you are looking as a couple. Can you be friends without fucking??? SURE! Can you be friends you are not attracted to??? YES!!!! I say again... Suck up and drive on. There's a couple out there for you. Keep diggin :-)
-D-
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Disabled Swingers - - My best friend was disabled, and while up until the last month of her life she was not confined to needing mobility assistance, she was active in the lifestyle and very upfront with people about her disability. She was always a BBW, struggling with issues from severe depression and diabetes, her weight fluctuated up and down as a side effect of various medications and changes in medications to manage her primary illness, that being bipolar disorder. Sometimes she had zero sex drive as a side effect of some of the medications for her depression, and sometimes she wanted sex 24/7 (Manic side of the bipolar disorder). She always told anyone that contacted her about her illness from the first contact/reply and would leave it up to them if there was ever to be an in person meeting knowing that she may or may not be able to play. We were friends for over 8 years, and while we were active in the lifestyle as a couple for 2 years we always let others know there was a possibility of the other one of us being around (especially when she was having bad times from her mental illness). She always had a good time when she was able to play, and we met a lot of really good people.
So just hang in there, be honest and confident. You will meet people that are willing to play with you once they understand your situation and limitations, and you will have some wonderful times.
Larry
age versus pics - - We have always had pics with our profiles, and we don't mind letting people see who we are. We've never had any problems yet. We figure if someone sees us on a swingers website, they must be there for the same reasons we are, or they wouldn't be looking in the first place.
We have pictures from last week, and we have some from several years ago. I doubt if anyone could really tell the difference. We're one of those lucky couples who have looked the same for a long time. We feel that if our pics are an accurate view of what we really look like, it really doesn't matter how old they are. We'd never try to fool anyone about what we look like. That would be dishonest, and that's just not us.
Gary & Paula
swingers helper... - I know some of us need this every now and again... - OMG FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!
BTW A car battery charger works great too...........lol
(So i hear) :z
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