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what if I want to but he doesn't - - [quote=NU2THEGAME]the worst part is that I consider myself intelligent with good common sense, so why can't i repress this- why is this so important to me right now? my hormones are taking over my common sense!! don't want to ruin a marriage for a cheap thrill- but also know that sex is a very important part of a marriage... part of it i'm sure is that I've been with him since i was 14..... i know this.[/quote]
There are many little things that we all do without that do not really affect our lives to any degree. But sometimes the little things turn out to be really big things. I would say that you have found one of yours.
I sounds like you are telling us that you everything your husband wants sexually. But there is something you need that you are not getting sexually. We could guess as to what that is but it would not help to guess. You need to examine and define what it is that you are lacking. Otherwise all we can do is talk in generalities. Some people only feel safe when things are neatly defined and unchanging.
I think that most swingers will tell you that sexually we get into a rut or pattern with any lover and that for many of us that is like the end of life. Most will also tell you that this lifestyle helps to keep you feeling alive and part of the world. You learn knew things from different people and your world opens wider.
Marriage changes how many think or act. Why that is would take many pages off topic. A marriage like good government should be one of give and take and compromise. Once one side had decided not to compromise or find a solution that makes their partner happy, then they have decided that the marriage is no linger important.
As an example: A woman once told me that after marriage her husband only touched her once a year on a specific day. The rest of the time he was a cold fish. That is all he wanted and what she wanted did not matter. In a way that was sexual abuse of the worst magnitude. To choose a celibate life for one
Xmas carols for swingers. - - ...or pawn stars.
Question for women - Bi sex - Sooo let me get this straight... your on a swingers site (since 2002) and your just now looking to hook up but yet your wife is afraid someone might find out about a F/F encounter??
We're confused... so its ok if someone knows or finds out that you are swingers as long as there's no F/F play??
What we're saying is, you state " We are both high profile types in our little pond and she is afraid that if she acted on her urges it would get out." so, do you not actively swing already? or have you been a member this long and never had an encounter? because if you have had a M/F encounter before then what would be the difference?
Just our 1/2 cent
Please don't take it the wrong way.. just inquirering minds... ;)
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - I take none of this seriously man. This is just a means for me to express myself at the time I happen to be writing.
-D-
911 THE REAL TRUTH - - Please take this idiotic banter to a diferent venue... This is a swingers site and both of you are simply fucking with words that, if we were lucky and Japaneese or some other nationality we would disregard as simply noises made with letters. I think that if you wish to keep this crap up simply go out and do the impossible... and get off this flaming party. You are both like a Japaneese Zero trying to make the enemys carrier deck so as to kill any pilot still in the air because he cannot now land. Problem with this is that neither of you will ever hit the other's landing deck.. and maybe all you two are doing is taking your penis' out and flailing at each other with limp members. Aren't at least one of you big enough to put your dick back in your pants and get on with the business at hand.......Fun Fantasy and sex, real sex, not this impotent flailing of limp rhetoric.. Get off my channel and the channel of every other serious swinger in here. Take it out back somewhere.. Go meet in Vagas or NYC or how about New Orleans. Theres plenty of shit down there to throw since the waste treatment plants overflowed.. Isn't enough, enough. Grow UP
NUFF SAID!!!!! BY me and definitely by both of you...Piss off
"Swinger Robots"?? - WtF?, Now, on top of everything else, we have to worry about Robot Swingers? - Ah, give the guy a break. He might just have thought it was funny like some lady's boob flopping out of her dress in an incredibly public situation, and isn't NECESSARILY transphobic. I'd suggest that there ought to be a term for folks who think someone inadvertantly embarrassing themselves is funny, except that I fear it'd probably end up being something like "normal".
As Valentine Michael Smith said, "Perhaps I don’t grok all its fullness yet. But find me something that really makes you laugh, sweetheart … a joke, or anything else – but something that gave you a real belly laugh, not a smile. Then we’ll see if there isn’t a wrongness in it somewhere and whether you would laugh if the wrongness wasn’t there.†“I had thought – I had been told – that a ‘funny’ thing is a thing of a goodness. It isn’t. Not ever is it funny to the person it happens to."
~Terry
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Small Town - Speak Out -
That\'s a shame. I have pictures posted, but they are in my private folder. This way I can (to a degree) manage who has access. My employement is in a field where if the wrong person ever found out I could lose my job. Richmond being a small city like it is; word of mouth and my lifestyle would never be a secret again. I\'m sure there are lots of other people that feel the same way. Heck just look at the lastest episode of Nip/Tuck where someone making a point informed a commanding officer of a bisexual within their ranks.
I use to have a private webpage meaning it was hidden so you could not find it by chance. I posted the link in a few lifestyle clubs and yes someone at my work did find out. Luckly they were just giving an FYI and warning me that a few other non-swingers knew that worked in my office. The person did not include their name so they also were afraid of fall out. Luckly nothing came of it, but I do consider myself lucky and have been more careful since.
It would be nice if none of us had anything to hide from, but sadly it\'s not the world we live in.
Friends with out benefits? - Is it possible to find friends on here who dont want to fuck? - Btw, we even have a name for couples like that. We call them "swirls" (not entirely vanilla and not entirely swingers...). [em]Emo_12[/em]
Cosplay ? - - bjkk;
[quote=EVILDOERS]I'd post the pics of us dressed as Marv and Goldie/Wendy from Sin City but our family has seen those pics and we'd prefer they not know we're swingers.
Anybody ever "played" (swinger-wise) while in costumes? I'm thinking it would take Cosplay to a WHOLE new level! [em]Emo_49[/em] [/quote]0
I kinda think that folks into playing as furrys fits that description. ~ Terry
Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - We have met plenty of people here and had lots of fun, There is a very big cross section of UT here, from the young and fit to the older larger folks like us and every combo in between.
If you put forth the effort you will find like minded folks to play with.
TJ.
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