Laurie Swingers in Missouri

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The New Neighbors Are Swingers - - That was awesome. I've been missing the button up shirt, F#@K!

Calling all losers! - LS and club scene - ...........................................I am bored on a Sunday, so going to waste a bit of time. :) I have said this before and I will mention it again here. Often times people are looking for a black and white answer, a "this" or "that" or they tend to pigeonhole themselves into a place that feels comfortable to them. It is great that people can search for and find people of similar interests. The original question was why is the Utah scene so closely related to the club scene. To me, that isn't necessarily the way things are and so I am responding to shed a different insight into the question. How big is the club scene in Utah? I don't feel it is that big. We have the Moose Lounge on Fridays on a regular basis, we used to have Habits and then we have the parties that happen once a month or less frequently, such as the Sinful parties. Give or take a few other club locations and attendees. The average attendance at the Moose Lounge is around 80 people every Friday. My guess is that this number is well under 10% of the swinging population in the area. Just estimating. This only happens once a week. If we only consider the weekend as play time (Friday and Saturday), which is also an inaccuracy since people do meet weekdays and Sunday as well, that means that only 5% of the population of swingers is actually attending the swinger club scene on the weekends. Certainly not a majority by any means. Sinful is definitely a club scene. And maybe we should define "club". I will say that is an environment where there is a DJ or another form of music, often times on the loud side as people like to dance, has a dance area for such activities, and typically doesn't open until 9 or so at night. Sinful probably hosts on average 150 people on average (S&A, don't get mad if this number is off,lol) and these happen maybe once a month. Lets just round this high and say that is 20% of the swinger population. However, many that attend the Moose and other clubs are the same that attend Sinful. Similar crowd and often an overlap. So still nowhere near a majority, or even a large percent. In fact, quite the opposite. This scene is well in the minority. So I am submitting that this really isn't and accurate assessment of the situation and based on more of a sense or feeling than actual fact. What this tells us then is that most of the people in the lifestyle are not meeting at clubs and are not necessarily dancing and staying up until all hours of the night but are finding other avenues where they meet. What other options are out there. Venus Game night, Kandy K, Sensual Massage... These venues are not club scenes, are a relaxed place and quiet enough to talk without "using hand signals". There still might be music and a dance floor, but there are certainly quite areas to talk, socialize and sometimes even fuck, if that is your scene. I would estimate that as many or more people attend these type of events and for most of these it is an older crowd who is more apt to be in bed at an earlier hour, though that is also an assumption and assumptions are obviously a poor way to derive information or determine a truth. I would question if any of the people in this forum have attending these more mellow parties and what they didn't like about that. The loud music is gone, it is a great way to meet many nice, non-pushy people with similar interests and since the crowd is a bit more mature (probably not the Venus parties) then there would be people of similar interests there. Now it may be of benefit of the party hosts to start earlier, say 6 or 7, so the activities can finish up earlier and I'm sure the hosts would entertain that if it was a common complaint. Apart from these types of parties and club scenes the only other way to meet people in a group setting are house parties, although keep in mind the Sinful hosts to things outside of the club but the crowd will usually still be the same people who attend the Sinful Club parties so are probably younger and okay with staying up late and partying, so probably not for the majority of people responding on this forum looking for an early-to-bed group. Let's talk about house parties. The ones we host sometimes have upwards of 60 or 70 people. These are people we have met before, for the most part, and we don't invite random people to these. We have an area to dance, music, but also areas that are quiet. The party starts around 7 and goes until... whenever. 6 am at times, but many leave before that. These aren't orgy parties and people don't show up expecting that. We also do game nights where we have 3-5 couples over for games, drinks, no dancing, hot tub, etc. Also people we know. We have been to many house parties as well and it is usually people we have met before. We are very leery of parties where there is some expectation to show up and fuck. We avoid these. Not our scene. But these house parties are out there. The doors close at 9, naked by 10, fucking by 1015. You are expected to fuck someone. Definitely not for us but definitely an okay and acceptable thing for others. Judgment is such an incredibly hypocritical thing in the lifestyle and I am astounded by how many people judge others. It is one thing to not enjoy a certain thing and to stay away from it, but it demean it, negate the validity of it and try to reduce the people who do it is completely asinine. My point is there is a variety, a full spectrum to every aspect of the lifestyle. From people looking only to make friends to people only looking to fuck. There is no right and wrong or black and white. We have so many good friends now that we feel super fortunate and blessed every day. But how did we meet those friends. Here is the key. Through hard work. Through dinner dates, clubs, social events, house parties and networking. Remember, this is my opinion, so please, readers, don't get offended. If you limit yourself to one avenue your success will be limited and you will have very few options in finding that fun couple that you click with. Many of our friends that we have met at a club typically like to be in bed at 10, or sometimes like to stay up late. Some of the people we have met in the most casual environment turn out to be crazy, fun party animals. I'm not saying if you don't attend the clubs you won't find what you are looking for especially since we have already determined that the club scene is so small. What I am saying is that if you are expecting a one-stop shop, or a fix-all, your success will be super limited. Your goal, I believe, is to meet as many people as possible and then sort through those you like and don't like until you are satisfied with your results. If you label the "club scene" as negative in your own mind, you might also be inadvertently labeling other fun activities and only reinforcing the confirmation bias you already have. Don't limit yourself to one way of finding friends, especially since it sounds like it isn't working that well for you now. We have found friends in every imaginable situation. Single dates, group dates, vacations, house parties and yes, clubs. I know our way works simply by the amount of amazing people that surround us and we call friends, and yes, some friends with benefits. Taking the time to start a topic is a good idea. The people on here all seem to have a similar interest and maybe some of you will take advantage of that, meet, and if things align, you make new friends. Maybe there is a need for a group to form that meets around 6 and finishes around 10 where only wine is served and only soft music is playing in the background. If so, take the initiative and form such a group. Create your own success. Maybe there needs to be a better way to post smaller events where only a few couples are going camping, coffee drinking, or similar. And maybe it is on Swingular and just not being utilized correctly. I'm sure with enough feedback the site could be fitted with such a feature. So don't despair. There are many, many people with similar interests and needs. You just have to find them. Each scene and venue has positives and negatives. Try to focus on the negative and utilize the resources that they are and you just might find your holy grail of FWB or what else it is you are looking for. Good job on the topic and hopefully that perfect couple is just around the corner. Mr. SRO...................................................................................................

Escort Couple - - If you are doing research as to the viability of the concept as a business opportunity or just because you think it might be exciting then I think that yes it would work. Swingers would not be your target market. Really, someone who is interested, but cannot be associated with the lifestyle would be your most likely client. Of course, we understand, this is all just erotic fantasy. This is of course just fun and games. Bedtime stories more than bedtime realities. There probably are, right here in Salt Lake City, more than a few ultra wealthy, attractive, intelligent men, deeply affiliated with the predominate religion that might just really go for it. Repressing a desire, over many years often lets it take control. So a descendant of old pioneer stock whose family life, social life, economic life and sizable inheritance are all contingent upon maintaining the appearances of absolute adherence to church standards, with a frigid wife, might be willing to pay bank rolls in return for certain experiences and discretion. The fact that you look quite upscale and are educated would most probably make you, as a couple, almost irresistible to just such a person with certain desires. Having once worked for a bank at a executive level (another life) and also having been part of church society (Also a former life for both of us) I still know quite a few tie wearing church going sorts that work for or in some cases are the

Are we really as judgmental as vanilla people? - - [quote=THOUGHTGARDEN]Are some people perhaps confusing "judgemental" with "selective"?[/quote] Right - some people seem to think that because we are swingers we have sex with anyone and therefore they view a rejection as a personal snub. I think they forget that "just not that into you" applies as much in swinging as vanilla relationships.

Who is going to Younge swingers week HEDO? - anyone going? - [quote=SEXYCPLNWYO]Oh but you look so young and sexy!!! [/quote] Its all about how you feel! Yep, left the apostrophy off because too lazy to put it in!!!!

Swinger Cruise - Fun for all - We are going on a Swingers Cruise in April. It is a full ship Swingers takeover (1000 couples) cruise out of Tampa to the Caribbean. Go to www.theswingercruise.com. They have a couple of cruises per year.

hall passes - valid? - What the lying scoundrels don't understand is that people of integrity usually have a lot more sex and a lot more enjoyable sex, with no regrets, whether they are swingers or monogamous, married or single because of their honesty. I am not saying that we all should go tell everyone, everything about our sex lives, when that information, is irrelevant in our communications and interaction with them. Our sex lives are not everyone's business. It frankly is however, relevant information, for anyone you are trying to develop a sexual and or romantic relationship with, and lying or leaving out information makes the person that does it a scoundrel. As for the two of us, we hope to avoid any sort of sexual proximity with scoundrels. We would also like to avoid people that knowingly give sex and sexual safe harbor to scoundrels. Scoundrels get a bad reputation, and a bad reputation is a barrier in life, sexually and otherwise.

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - I would like to point out one thing, when you are a single male you and you are straight and you want a couple then you bring nothing to table. You have nothing to offer the husband of the couple aside from a show but you are asking the man of the couple to share his wife with you with nothing more then a thank you in exchange, in most cases single men have a gf or wife but simply do not want to risk sharing them because they are afraid of losing them, having them leave or know thats what you want to start doing or will be trying to do or they do not want to take the effort and risk and time to get their partner involved. There is also the point that alot of people have fetish's but I do not know alot of white couples that are interested in black men, not every woman like a cock over 8" either, there are some but we have not met very many and it seems to be a very select group and type of swinger. We have had single men in the past but those single men had the highest respect for our relationship, they also did not get anything right away and had to show their merit as a sincere person that wanted friendship but no emotional attachment. In this day and age of disease we also are very selective with the people we swing with for obvious reasons. As a final note, if and when you find a female partner and she lives with you in a commited relationship if you are already not in one will you be willing to share her with another man with nothing in return? Ill be willing to bet like most couples you will seek only a single female to join you in a threeway.

Date for a party.... - - Hi all. Sometimes we see an invitation for a party on this website. You see: Coming to xxxx this weekend? Please add a date for that weekend. Now you cannot see immediately if this weekend is history already. A swingers hug from The Netherlands.

Taking one for the team - Put a picture of your male half in your profile! - First of all, NOBODY should fuck someone they don't want to fuck. Having said that, though, we've found that "taking one for the team" is usually somewhat relative. It seems to quite often be the case that if you actually LOOK hard enough for attractive qualities in other people you are apt to find them. At least one or two qualities! LOL We've almost never encountered another couple where one of us was attracted to one of them and their partner was completely unattractive. I guess if someone is reasonably attractive they're pretty unlikely to end up with someone who isn't attractive at all. But we've also found (and yes, we're guilty of this sometimes as well) that many people sort of get in their own way, so to speak, when it comes to looking for people to play with and, often, almost look for reasons NOT to play and, in effect, end up talking themselves out of playing. When we first started in the lifestyle it was FAR more labor-intensive (no internet swingsites) to look for other couples and there were far fewer swingers as well so if you were extremely picky you pretty much didn't ever actually end up playing. By the time most people jumped through all the hoops you had to jump thru to find other couples most people were pretty predisposed to playing, unless they were really turned off for some reason. Now, it seems like there are just so many options, literally right at our fingertips, that perhaps it's just a little too easy to keep swiping left...always looking for the bigger, better deal. Again, don't fuck someone you really don't want to fuck but also, maybe, consider digging just a little deeper and see if you can't find something compelling about a person that could lead to a really great time in bed. What's that old saying about sex and pizza? [em]Emo_70[/em]