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BUSTED! Your Kids Found Out Your Swingers. Now What? - - IMO, you wouldn't explain yourself about your monogamous "vanilla" sex life or activities, so why would you about this?
The subject of this thread was about your kids finding out. I'm not sure what age group of kids we're talking about and that can make a big difference. If they are adult children, you can simply tell them you are sorry they had to find out about it and regret that it makes them uncomfortable but it is your private life and will leave it there...in private. I think it is wise to reassure them that you will not do anything to embarrass them (start acting differently around them or other family members, etc.) and that nothing between you and them will change. Before they found out you were still the parent they loved and this will continue now.
If they are young children, it can be a little more complicated. The questions aren't just about the lifestyle but also about sex since they are probably learning and curious about the topic in general. But, you could keep it very simple (& age appropriate) and explain that sex is something adults enjoy privately and that if they have any questions about sex (emphasis not on swinging) you will be happy to answer.
If they pursue asking about swinging, I would just share that this is something better explained when they are a little older and that honesty and communication are valued so you will try to be as honest as you can be. However, you don't need to go into detail IMO. Often, kids are looking more for your reaction and some reassurance and aren't quite as concerned with the actual "words". They want to know their world isn't being disrupted.
The rest of your post mentioned family members, etc. Again, you would never feel obligated sit around and discuss the details of a vanilla sex life so it isn't necessary to discuss the details of swinging.
You could share that if someone has a private question they would like to ask they can if that's the kind of relationship you have with them. But, you can also add that you will only do so if comfortable.
I might stress or emphasize that you and your partner have an open and honest relationship that you enjoy together. There are a number of factors that go into enhancing that relationship making it so special and that they've stumbled onto one area that you've incorporated/explored. You appreciate that it might not be for everyone and you wouldn't expect everyone to understand but that you sincerely hope they would also be as considerate to not judge the two of you. I might add that while you've tried to be candid when answering their questions, you only ask in return that they respect your privacy and not share what they've learned or discussed with anyone else. Include them into the agreement by explaining that you will extend to them the same discretion they extend to you.
Who knows...one of them may have been curious about exploring the lifestyle and you might just be that one person they feel comfortable asking about it.
At the same time, people can be very judgemental so protect yourselves. However these family members found out...it could happen again if that avenue hasn't been fixed. I'm sorry this got so long-winded and I could write so much more. Whew!!! Good luck with this!
Interesting Last or Maiden Names - Names to remember people by - I knew a mechanic by the name of Dick Peters his wifes name was Sharon. They would have been great swingers...well her anyway. LOL
swingers defined - - [quote=KIDSATPLAY]How would you define yourself? How would you defend yourself if a respected vanilla challenged your lifestyle? [/quote]
sex is sex and love is love... one has nothing to do with the other, but together they are amazing! the way I see it, he is mine and any girls who may come along are just fun sex toys for him.
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - 2001 Toyota Echo. My husband says its a babe magnet.
Small Penises in the Lifestyle - - Being a guy who is 'blessed,' I can tell you a few things:
1.) I am [b]NOT[/b] user friendly...A little bit hard to handle for some.
2.) THere are some playgrounds I am not invited to, anal is [b]NEVER[/b] offered nor OK'd.
3.) Once people know about my size, I become a walking penis.
4.) Do NOT believe what people say about size, the ruler used by swingers is missing, on average, about 3-4 inches on them, so a 12 incher is really 8 or 9...
Habits tonight?? - We would love to dance - [quote=BMSHELL]How many of the people at habits on a given Saturday night are swingers? How do you know who to hit on? =)
[/quote]
That's part of the fun...always wondering and watching. We usually let the girls decide ... if there's an attraction ... we take it from there.
How to find other swingers - - Are there any codes that help to identify other swingers.
asking your swinger friend if you can join them. - - Honestly, a lot of people here are being negative about single men. Don't let it make you feel like you are a leper. A lot of couples seek out single men. Everyone has their own preferences. If your friend confided enough in you to tell you that he and his spouse were swingers he obviously is open enough with you to not be upset you asked something like that. What exactly are you looking/interested in doing with her(them potentially)? Threesome, voyeurism, DP, DVP, or are you just wanting to take his wife alone for an evening of some great swingers sex lol?
New Rating System to Match Couples - This will take care of the - +10 points for Gryffindor!
+50 points for BUMMYPUS!
.... and +5 points for our new friend from Kamas who finally got all "good natured" and showed some love. (although, even with the extra 5 points, you're still way at the bottom of the swinger food chain... along with the toll-booth workers, orangutans, bicycle seat sniffers, and other assorted undesirables)
I know its tough being a single male... trying to score some wild poontang in the wonderful world of the swingers. You'd think with this smorgASSborg of fine pussy around here, there'd certainly must be some extras lying around waiting for a fine fella like you to dip his twig into??!!
I feel for you, man (not really, but work with me here). But you've got to bring a dish to the potluck (baked roadkill doesn't cut it) if you want to sit at the big kids' table.
Suggestion: grab a girl (human), and a shower, and join the rest of the swinger party. One thing we don't need is extra 'swingin' dicks' at the HO-down. .... Extra bunny tail, that's a different story now, isn't it? Like my one-eyed pappy always sez... "Son, life ain't fair"
He also used to say "Boy, there is a 22.5% chance I ain't yer real Pappy" I'm not sure what that exactly meant, but I'm sure he loved me as much as that old Chevy pickup of his.
Cheers!
BTW, Whenever I get all jazzed up, my good friend Mike always asks me...
WWJD ... for a Klondike Bar?
MERRY XMAS TO EVERYBODY - WE WOULD LIKE TO GET A GROUP TOG FOR PLEASURE PALACE DEC 18 - I JUST WANTED TO WISH EVERYBODY A MERRY XMAS !!!!!!!
I WISH EVERYBODY A SAFE BUT LOTS OF FUN HOLIDAY WITH FAMILY & FRIENDS .
WE ARE GOING TO TRY OUR DAMNEST TO GO TO PLEASURE PALACE TOM . NIGHT DEC. 18 .
SHOULD BE A HUGE AND TONS OF FUN PARTY . CANT WAIT TO SEE EVERYBODY THERE . IF ANY OF YALL CAN STOP BY THE PALACE PLEASE SAY HI .I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT EVERYBODY IS WEARING .
FROM WHAT I HEAR ALOT OF PEOPLE ARE GOING TO THE PARTY . U KNOW HOW IT IS THERE . ALL THE SWINGERS GROUPS THAT GO THERE TO PARTY PLEASURE PALACE STYLE .
SEE EVERYBODY THERE ..................
NAUGHTY DREAMS
FREAKY KITTY
WWW.SWINGERSOFAMERICA.COM
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