Otis Swingers in Louisiana

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Why the male side of Couples are here...? - I will admit I am hoping to spark some heated debate on this.... - (from Terry) And now I'm starting to understand why Evil and I seem to have senses of huimor that sometimes run in the same direction. It's because, in at least some pretty important ways, we see the world in the same way. I'm here for two reasons. First, I was doing this for a while back when it was one Hell of a lot harder than it is now for single men, they were very nearly completely excluded from the lifestyle which, then, was usually called, by both those inside and outside of it, "wife swapping". The very title, and the basic premise of things then, essentially disqualified single men. Now I'm talking about the late '70s and early '80s. Actual "hippiedom", and the free love philosophy was either diminishing, dying off, or dead, depending on where in the country you were. But we'd managed to change society's general view of some things, and sex was one of the biggest. The attitude change, especially on the part of women, who were no longer automatically "sluts" if they enjoyed sex and didn't need to be married, or engaged, or even "going steady" to indulge, together with effective and easily available birth control (illegal in every state until sometime in the early '60s, even condoms were ostensibly sold as and were labeled as being specifically for "disease prevention", and no worries about deadly and/or incurable STDs had changed the world, and birthed what is often referred to as a "sexual revolution". It was almost like falling off a log to go out on a weekend and find an amenable girl. So why the Hell was I bothering with the "wife swapping" world, when it was so damned difficult to even penetrate, let alone to "get something"? For the same reason I was one of those long-haired (except for my 3 years in the Army) hippie freak. I LOVE people who ignore what the rest of the world is telling them to do or not to do, and I want to be around them. Yeah, there are all sorts of individual exceptions, but, for the most part, as compared to the vanilla people, swingers are more intelligent, more likely to use their heads for something besides a hat rack, and, despite the various complaints about certain kinds of people or actions that pop up here, a Hell of a lot less judgmental and intolerant of people who aren't the same as they are. They, again as a general rule, think for themselves, and don't just latch on to the currently popular opinion about whatever. Why I'm here now is that I'm married to a girl 24 years younger than me, who happens to enjoy a couple things I can do but which I'm not really into, and she's at that so-called female sexual peak point in her life. And I figure that my main purpose in the world is to do everything I can to make her as happy as she can be. Being witches, we don't have the standard "you belong to me and only me" attitude about our life partners, we don't think sexual fun with some other person does a damned thing to diminish our relationship; if I have sex with Jane Doe or she has sex with John Smith (and maybe Jane Smith, too), we are still the same people afterwards that we were beforehand. So getting back into it, and bringing her into it, was a great way to help her have the kinds of fun she likes, and for me to hang around with a group of people that I really like. And meet and play with girls I really like. I'm one of those weird guys who does read the profiles before looking at the pics, and even once in a great while even send off an email before I've even seen any of the pics besides the main profile pic. It's just a lot more important who she is and what she's like than it is what she looks like. And I'll find lots more girls that I like and respect here than I ever could in the vanilla world. One thing about what Team said, though. Swinging can bring out and amplify problems in a relationship. But avoiding that is just a question of attitude. First, you have to absolutely trust in your partner's honesty with you. Even though the Mrs. has a hall pass, the only provision being that I meet any guy she might play with before she does, so I can feel like she's going to be safe with him, I know I'd be really upset if she ever started messing around with someone on the side without me even knowing it was going on. But In don't ever even worry about that actually happening, because I trust her completely. Just like she trusts me, not only to not start a secret "affair" with someone, but to never try to even influence who she does or doesn't play with. She knows that when I meet some potential playmate of hers, even if for some reason I think he's a total jerk, I'm not going to say anything. She's the one who will be playing with him, not me, so it's her job, not mine, to decide who's worth playing with. She knows the only time I'll have anything to say about whether she should or not is if I get an impression somehow that the guy can't be trusted to treat her well, and not ever hurt her, ever do or try to do anything she doesn't want. Point is, if you both don't totally trust each other, you're likely to have problems, even if neither of you ever actually does anything sneaky. The second thing is that you can't have the "normal" attitude about your partner, where you feel he or she is in a way your property, and if anyone else uses your property, you're being stolen from. You can't have that feeling that sex equates to love, the kind of love that makes someone want to permanently be with someone. else. If you feel that way, you'll end up worrying that having sex with another person might make him or her decide they've found a better companion, and leave you. Sex is something that goes with that permanent relationship kind of love, but it isn't what determines it. If you can't truly see, and feel, that sex itself is just another enjoyable activity that you do with people you like, just another form of friendship based intimacy like discussing some problem you have with a friend, you're probably going to have problems. If you're at all, in any way or for any reason, at all uncomfortable with your partner having sex with other people, or he or she is uncomfortable with you doing it, then you're probably going to run into difficulties. So it's all a matter of attitude. If you and your partner are truly completely fine with the other having sex with someone else, and if you both trust each other completely, swinging isn't going to destroy your relationship. If both of those attitude type things are not really and truly true for either of you, then it just might. And about that 70 years old thing, Hell, I'm only 6 years away from it, and I haven't yet run into any indications of decline. So far, the girls I've ended up in the bedroom with have been happy with the results. While I haven't yet (thank the Goddess), had to just rely on that ages old bit of wisdom, the one that says "when you're too old to cut the mustard, you can always lick the jar", it ain't everyone that can tie a cherry stem in a knot with his tongue, and I suppose that might be helping me out, but, then again, that always helps out, no matter how young you are [em]Emo_4[/em] But just in case that needing to be taken care of bit is one of those things that happens all of a sudden, like maybe it hits you at one minute past midnight on your 70th birthday, I think I better get Evil to hook me up with those friends of his, so we can have that room all arranged for and booked. Only Evil's limiting himself. I want 3 if those insatiable 22 year olds, one redhead, one blonde, and one brunette. When I commit suicide, I want it to be a truly memorable event, even though I won't be around to remember it. [em]Emo_45[/em] I mean, we can set up cameras and stuff in there, then my wife can get it all edited into a good porn flick, and the proceeds can help her out, in case we haven't managed to find her a nice sugar daddy by then.

St George monthly Meet N Greet - A monthly meet up to mingle with and have like minded conversations with LS people. - We hope you have a successful turn out. We have a few friends and acquaintances that identify as poly more than swingers. This group used to have weekly get togethers, for whoever showed up at a coffee shop. We went ever so often and it was fun. Sometimes maybe six people showed up, including the two of us, and sometimes there might be more than twenty. We enjoyed a lot of great conversations. The absence of loud music kind of helped with that. We made some new friends. Informal opportunities, early in the evening, where you can just show up, whenever possible are really cool.

Swingers now officially a high risk group for STDs and STIs - Do your own research - I think everyone has got your point !!!! And yes it is smart to be tested and have safe sex but just because you have safe sex there is still a risk ...... I mean really there is a million ways to die so choose one . I say if you have been monogamous for months and you tested clean then its a great time for you to get out of the lifestyle . But why scare the hell out of everyone ??? In life with no risk then there is no reward . Just my thought ( To each there own ) Badboy

Mixed Lifestyle Parties - - [quote=Cpl4Fwb][quote=WEWNT2PLAY]Although for those that would be concerned about being outed in the LS, what is the overall concern? I mean if I'm considering this type of party it's not like the bishop or pastor is going to be there, and the likelihood of being seen elsewhere would be slim to none. None the less they are valid concerns and now I have to decide what to do.[/quote] We are only speaking for ourselves here ... Discretion - we would prefer to choose to whom we reveal our lifestyle actives with. Even on lifestyle sites and other social media sites, we enjoy a level of anonymity. We control what and to whom we reveal more identifying information (face pictures, names, contact info, etc). Yes, there is a risk in going to lifestyle events and parties. However, most people in the lifestyle believe in mutual assured destruction. If someone tells their vanilla friends, "Hey, I saw Dave & Danna at a swinger party.", their vanilla friends would probably ask, "What were you doing at a swinger party?" In our time in the lifestyle, we have run into three co-workers, two high school classmates, the mother of a child on our child's athletic team, and a woman who we shared a daily commute with on public transportation. So yes, there is a good chance people may run into others from their vanilla lives in the lifefstyle at some time or another.[/quote] We agree with most of these comments. Vanilla people have absolutely no reason to keep LS peoples secrets, and I think they’re more likely to gossip about something relatively foreign to them (like a LS party they attended). I’ve had two vanilla coworkers in my office talk about going to The NYer to people watch swingers, and that just made me cringe. I would not trust a vanilla person to keep our secret, and even less if we saw them at a “mixed” type of party where any conclusions could be made. We would rather keep our vanilla friends and our LS friends completely separate for privacy’s sake. No matter how hard vanillas try, most of them cannot wrap their heads around our LS, and just avoiding vanillas while pursuing our LS hobbies is our safest bet. Being fully open to the world about being a swinger is absolutely not something we want in a couples friendship either. We would avoid that as much as we would avoid any chance of vanillas finding out about us. Guilt by association could be just as harmful to our personal and professional lives. As was said above though… your party, your friends. Just make sure all your LS friends are aware of what you’re doing. Some may not care, some could absolutely care if vanillas were there.

Is this one of your rules? What is it? is it fear? or something - Does everyone feel this way? - Don, I completely agree. I'm not suggesting "friends first" folks are wrong. I'm just explaining: 1. Why WE don't use that phrase...and folks often make offensive assumptions about us because we don't. 2. Why WE are always a bit uneasy about contacting couples who DO use that phrase. FYI, around where we live, we have this whole "lifestyle clique" who run around protesting WAY too much about how friends is all that matters and they aren't in it for the sex at all, and labeling anyone who disagrees with them as "bedpost notchers." Mostly though, the way you get in their crosshairs is by telling one of them "no thanks." So this is a bit of a sore subject for us...as we DID tell a few of them "no thanks" and we aren't about to lie and say we didn't become swingers for the sexual aspects. Duh! LOL

Difficult in finding Couples or single Males/ Females - - join a local group. you're in utah for crying out loud, thats where all the swingers are. seriously, don't knock it till you try it. one of our most sucessful swinging encounters was with a couple old enough to be my parents.

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - 2003 Chrysler Town & Country Limited MINIVAN...now that's a "babe magnet" if ya ever saw one! LOL! We're always joking around with our Harley couples that we can at least have an orgy in our vehicle. Bwahahahahaha! ;) One time for my birthday, Candy gave me a FMF for my birthday. We had to go pick the girl up which was 1 1/2 hours away. We took the middle seats out and layed down a double sided mink blanket. Within minutes of picking her up, the girls were kissing and had each other's clothes off in no time. Needless to say...The Longest Drive In My Life!!!!!!! LOL! But STILL, the best birthday present EVER! ;)

Help us out.. Take this Survey - For Utah Swingers - Done, would be interested in the results.

How to find other swingers - - We're working on various items for the 7946437. Vern and I own a full service printshop and we have those bands in stock. Also we would love the opportunity to print for C2S. We love working and networking with those in the lifestlye. Feel free to contact us. Missy & Vern

Do your friends and family know about your lifestyle? - - Well... does our families know? 12 years ago Kelly and I went to our first swingers party. I was nervous and it was made worse by seeing my mothers boyfirend there with his wife. No my mother did not know he was married. Am I going to go tell on this asshole..... no. He told on me!! My mother came alll the way into to Salt Lake (which she has only done 3 times in the 13 years I have lived in Salt Lake) to give me a rash of shit over it and explained that was the reason her and my dad got a divorce (I assume he wanted to do it and she didn't). She said the Kelly and I were going to end up the same way. I of course told her it was a one time thing and we didn't plan on ever going to another party. I know how very small this world is, and it is very small, I like to think that I have kept it secret enough that the only people who knew were fellow swingers and the ones I have elected to tell. Do my friends know? Well I have a good friend who I have told yes.... but the operative word being GOOD friend... and her and her hubby have decided to give it a try. See if they like the extra spice. In a snese if I tell someone I end up promoting the lifestyle.... but it is very few that I have told. Do co-workers know? I say only the sexy guys at my job know.... and I mean the really sexy guys... with the brown eyes and brown hair and mustache and goatee and a dick that knows how to pleasure me.